The topic, “what are you worth”, seemed to inspire many to voice their thoughts and feelings about every aspect of this dance field. But there seems to be a correlation between how women really feel about their self identity and what they present to the outside world. But as I found out, maybe belly dance brings out those hidden anxieties that whisper what we lack, what we aren’t or what we’ll never be. How can anyone come into this dance form and not eventually show her true neon colors that give away her diary of thoughts in the most intimate ways. Worth can be a double edged sword because we are the ones defending our worth and asking for proof at the same time. As I look in the mirror, I teeter totter from the obvious crux of my convictions. It’s not easy defending  oneself from well…oneself. There seems to be so much in the eye of the beholder and worth seems to be close to the top of a self created list of worth versus insignificance.

How we project our female image, sensual flirtation, sexual innuendos or explicit emotion, says so much about the journey of our self identity as women. Self identity is locked in with the physical body perception each individual dancer has of herself and with this being said; worth in the eyes of the dancer can be slightly warped. It’s this peculiarly warped sense of self that I think sometimes the audience can’t get enough of because seriously, people love to see drama unfold within a woman because women are definitively dramatic.

“I will not be “famous,” “great.” I will go on adventuring, changing, opening my mind and my eyes, refusing to be stamped and stereotyped. The thing is to free one’s self: to let it find its dimensions, not be impeded.” Virginia Woolf, -A Writer’s Diary

Many who wrote in talked about the issues of our dance and the consequences of change happening that in many respects, feels out of their control. How can a woman who has been in this dance field for multiple years even begin to understand the new mind set of this emerging generation of dancer’s? As I have stated before, when creativity is in the forefront of a woman’s desires, she will most likely not ask if her version, style or ideas are acceptable to her peers. Freedom of interpretation flashes it’s brightly colored lights within the artistic mind. Here lies the conflict; freedom versus tradition.

Our type of entertainment is a very peculiar career choice because it’s risky at best and with so many people hopeful of being the next celebrated dancer, it’s a lottery type gamble that may not pay off in the end. How much we put into dance can’t necessarily be measured in money but realistically it does need to meet some criteria that pays back monetarily. Belly dance can be a bottomless pit that devours money, time and attention. In the world of paying bills, entertainment is not always the best bet but it does do one thing, it satisfies a spiritual hunger that requires sustenance that can be insatiable due to lack of outlets. Most women will speak of a fulfillment that is better than anything monetarily and I agree, but I found that eventually my worth had to bring in money so that I could feed my spiritual needs.

So let’s look at feeding our spiritual needs. Worth means so much more when we gamble; perhaps it’s the unknown outcome of our efforts that intrigues us. Since life is full of twists and turns the unknown factor of the outcome of my efforts sometimes became just as exciting as a positive outcome. In many ways I see myself as s risk taker especially since my dance didn’t offer me the bottom line. The bottom line as I found out become elusive almost masking itself in probable outcomes that intrigued me sometimes more than making money.

Worth becomes a piece of the puzzle only after experience turns us inside out, worn and exhausted.  Stepping up to the plate means placing experience where it belongs and no longer bartering for your art.

“I am not a little bit of many things; but I am the sufficient representation of many things. I am not an incompletion of all these races; but I am a masterpiece of the prolific. I am an entirety, I am not a lack of anything; rather I am a whole of many things. God did not see it needful to make me generic. He thinks I am better than that.” C. JoyBell C.

My concern for belly dance is how it’s definition is changing and how that affects my worth as a dancer. We know the issues we face but I wonder in ten years if we don’t become proactive in a addressing them, will our dance form become unrecognizable. Okay…maybe I’m exaggerating here and yes I know it has to change but the changes have to do with individual interpretations of creativity, ideologies and self image. This means that within a blink of an eye, I am no longer walking my path the same way as I did 15 years ago. I am in unchartered waters and I’m finding my compass isn’t working.

“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in; their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.”  Elizabeth Kübler-Ross

After writing my book, “The Divine Unrest”, I realized something had happened; I had morphed and evolved along with all the experiences of my belly dance path. My worth was in the pudding because I created a definitive career based on my beliefs and ideologies. So I have to say, is it even fair for me to have issues with changes when I walked my path just as many are doing today? There were steps I took that helped me understand how to mold my craft making it what it is and maybe it’s the steps some dancers aren’t taking that I have issue with. I don’t want to go into what the steps are because we’ve been down this road before but I will say that worth is an investment besides and accomplishment. Dancers who take short cuts will ultimately find they are at a disadvantage compared to dancers who take their time learning appropriately the skills needed to succeed.

“There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.”

Beverly Sills

This topic of worth in dance needs to be openly discussed amongst all dancers and I encourage dance teachers to make this an essential part of their teaching methodology. It’s vital beginner students know the road ahead of them. They have to know that what they put into their dance will ultimately be what they get out of it. If belly dance represents how we live life it would behoove anyone to give their best, no short cuts included just a desire to make dreams come true the old fashioned way called hard work, happy work and the tenacious will to succeed.

News

My choreography book is done and the cover is being worked on now. It will consist of combos that I teach in my classes and I am hoping it will give you all ideas for your dance choreographies. We will send out a post letting you all know when it’s ready.

I am editing a new video for Belly Dance Village with Sakti Rinek. Barbara Harmon joined in and I have footage of Sakti’s dance class. So it should be an exciting video and fun to watch.

Jareeda’s next issue is going to be coming out soon so don’t forget to subscribe, www.jareeda.com

The post What are You Worth Part 2 appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

A friend of mine was initially hired for a workshop in another city and like many of us, she excitedly started to prepare her curriculum for her future  weekend excursion. As preparations were in place, the topic of her worth or in other words what she charged became an issue for the officiating hosts. They didn’t want to pay what she felt was a fair price and they countered with a much lower amount that made it impossible for her to make any money. Does this sound familiar? It does to me so I thought I would talk about the worth of our dance training, the worth of our efforts and the underlying problem of wanting something for nothing.

Dance is a way to express our inner desires and it seems to be designed to help us figure out our worth as women and dancers. As time passes eventually women have to decide if they want to make money with their dancing and if so what the worth of their dance is to them. This is where there needs to be a pay scale for our dance field and it needs to go according to experience and skill not convenience or affordability. If a dance gig costs more to dance at then a dancer is being paid, obviously there needs to be a reality check. Either a dancer doesn’t mind losing money (which is nuts) or she hasn’t figured out her worth. It’s wonderful to be invited to dance but if you don’t understand what your time is worth in this business, then you will set yourself up for being taken advantage of and you will have nobody to blame but yourself.

If dancers want to bring in a professional dancer/entertainer, there is one obvious rule to follow, if you can’t afford to bring her in, don’t hire her in the first place. In my friends case after starting to get the word out, she had to bow out which did sting a bit because the reality  hit home that her years of experience and worth basically weren’t a considering factor. This type of situation can hurt the resiliency of most hardened and seasoned of dancers. So the question needs to be asked, “What the hell were the workshop hosts thinking when they wanted to hire a professional dancer in the first place?”

Dance is an intrinsic part of the definitive feminine that constantly changes through out history and to be honest in this scenario, it has changed so much so, that it is nothing like when  I first came on to the belly dance scene. But like women, belly dance can alter her appearance and I believe this is one of the  many reasons why women resonate so much with belly dance. It’s for this very reason we enjoy the rapturous emotions of the stage,  movement and the freedom to choose our individuality in our dance field because all the above make us feel unique. But even the romantic notions of what belly dance is has to be placed in it’s appropriate compartment.

What is necessary in the marketing of any type of entertainment is a clear cut application of income versus expenditures. And yes, this takes away from the,” it’s fun time” but after it is all said and done, nobody in today’s day and age has money to throw away even if it’s considered recreation, passion or “me” time . Studios take money to run, costumes take money to buy, gigs cost money for gas and workshops cost the professional dancer for their time, expenses and expertise while the host pays for said services, space, advertizing etc. There’s no getting around the business aspect of this dance form because in the end if any dancer wants to make a living, partial living or break even, eventually reality has to make an appearance. Worth has to be figured in to any given decision and if a dancer settles for less than she is worth, it will eventually down the line affect her psyche or worse wear down her self confidence to a place of self doubt, depression along with no money or benefits to show for her efforts.

So let’s ask the question why would anyone willingly put all their time and efforts into dancing on stage and do it for “no” pay? I do it occasionally for children’s benefits and my family or family friends who ask me  but outside of that I have stopped in the last 6 years doing performances for free. I know there are many dancers out there who would ask why I would do such a thing because after all the joy of performing is the payback. That was true before I officially made dance a full time endeavor that is now paying the bills without a second job. My worth became meshed in with the family business and accepting gigs wasn’t just my decision anymore, it became a family affair.

This dance form has a few draw backs and one of them is the fantasy aspect of its weight in gold which is decided by the individual dancer and student. It can’t be a fair judgment if we are in the middle of individual allowances versus economics.  I can remember years ago when I saw a costume that was to die for…I decided in my mind how I could swing the hefty price of $900.00. In my head with the kind of math that I do, I always make sure that everything comes in the green so I justify my purchase…at least to myself. When I was dancing 4 nights a week, I could make up the difference quicker but now I work on videos, books and teaching classes so I don’t make money like I used to. If a professional can figure in weekly classes, gigs and the club and restaurant circuit, there’s a chance if she is constantly promoting herself that she can make money. Self worth has got to be factored in at this point because “free” can’t pay the bills or allow for spending the amount needed to look the part of a professional. In other words, in today’s economics what we used to get by with doesn’t cut it anymore.

Another issue that we all have to contend with is the ignorant assumptions that we can come in and teach for hourly wages. Let’s face it, if we can charge, 10-12-15 for a class per person, why would we agree to an hourly wage? If I’m paying for space and part of that money is coming out of what each individual student is paying, it makes sense to teach and market my own classes instead of allowing another entity to market my class in a general listing for an hourly wage. I exclude colleges and universities here because they give a teacher prestige that she can apply to her resume. In the end, the bio or reference factor for each teacher has a lot to do with how much she values her own worth.

It seems like I talk about self worth quite often and I’m not trying to repeat myself here, what I am trying to do is to address a problem we have in our dance field. There are so many dancers now and everyone obviously wants something from this dance. Some want to learn and the chance to enjoy themselves in an environment with women. Others are looking for recreation that’s fun besides good fitness. But more often then not there are those who are so enchanted with the dance, they want all that comes with it…fame, fortune, globe trotting and beyond. So while the latter may not happen for everyone, it’s the lottery mind set that gets the imagination rolling, engaged in all the possibilities of being the one that makes it.

Reality has to play a part in any aspect of life and while most dancers will spend a majority of their dance lives intending and manifesting the creative fruits of their labor, they also need to understand that a good business outline will help the process flourish too.

Worth is the inner dialogue that speaks to the outside world in a subtle and cryptic language. If any conversation doesn’t converge with a strait forward message that is candid, then it can get muddied down with misunderstood innuendos that will manifest themselves at inopportune times and with unnecessary problems. I know this one well with some of the shows I’ve produced because it felt like my inner dialogue speaking another language and I had no clue how to interpret what was coming out of my mouth. I learned that the more strait forward I was, the better the results were even if some fiasco or unfortunate situation happened. If my intentions were clear at least to myself then my inner dialogue made more sense to me and I then could speak a language that made sense to others. I have always felt that it’s better to get the truth out because in the end it says a lot about a person’s self worth. When everyone knows where everyone is coming from, problems can get fixed and creative ideas flourish which for most performers means the best outcome for all involved. After all is said and done, it’s the audience’s applause we yearn for saying, “well done.”

Today I know what I want for my time and I don’t bat an eyelash when I ask my price. People will either say yes or no but the bottom line is I don’t compromise on my dance anymore. There is no negotiating my worth because I learned a long time ago that once I was willing to barter with my dance, it no longer was a precious commodity that I was supporting. Unknowingly I made it a product up for the highest bidder or in many cases the lowest. Lesson learned; the measuring stick of my accomplishments has to come from me. The one thing that I would hope dancers remember is that if they don’t want to be talked down on their price then don’t do it to another dancer. It’s really not that hard to accomplish anything you want as long as you understand and know your worth along with others.

Check out:

www.jareeda.com

www.bellydancevillage.com

www.leyla-najma.com

The post What are you Worth? appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

Okay, I’ll be honest here…I can whine about a lot of stuff but I really do enjoy life and her magical ways. So I thought I would write a bit about the whimsy of women considering we really do make the world more colorful, visually beautiful and vibrant!  Sometimes it’s taking a siesta and enjoying the sunshine encircling you like a blanket or it’s the wind swinging the hammock, either way the point is, there’s always something to appreciate about life. So if any of you are feeling the blues…let’s make a little whimsy!

Now and then we all need to make a splash, make some noise so we can feel alive. If the winter blues occasionally take hold of me, making me feel blah inside, every once in a while for whimsy sake; I wear my hip scarf with my gypsy skirts and walk around the grocery store making a jingling noise saying out loud, “here I am!”  We are entertainers after all and it’s only natural that when we aren’t on stage, we still want to be the center of attention or maybe it’s me because I’m a Gemini but I doubt this…

Day in and day out we can get stuck in the same clothes, jeans or pajama bottoms…comfy clothes that can be thrown on in a moments notice. Winter can make goose bumps a fact of life and because of this, why would anyone even want to wear something that could expose an inch of flesh? With this being said, come on girls, if we don’t occasionally dress up we’ll set ourselves up for those middle of the week blues, Sunday blues or whatever blues. I have a red velvet top that I can pair up with a couple skirts and I feel like a sexy vixen every time I wear. I’ll share a secret with you too, it’s even gotten me out of a few tickets so it’s Dan’s favorite top!

Coming out of winter can be comparative to a car running on empty. Getting to the gas station can be a bit daunting when you’re running on fumes. I highly recommend getting whimsical with a banana split, hot fudge sundae or your favorite ice cream to wake you up from your winter slumber. Yes I know what some of you health food enthusiasts might say, but I’m only recommending this for every once in a while especially now that we are getting out of winter. Ice cream takes me back to my childhood and along with it are those amazing memories of  laughing, licking my ice cream before it melted on my dress then playing in the park. All three of those memories go together like a milkshake so it doesn’t hurt to start a good mind set for the beginning of Spring in order to get our inspiration and creative ideas flowing.

Lipstick is my whimsical signature mark that finishes off my make up, almost like an artists final stroke that finishes off a painting. Red lipstick is the sign of rose blossoms, poetry, sensuality and some saucy fantasies. Pink lipstick reminds me of ice tea, garden parties and running barefoot in the house. Purple is the color of wine, song and laughter and I like to wear a combination of pink and purple for no other reason than I just like to. It’s the color of the Sandia Mountains here at home when the sun is setting on them, lighting them in all their glory. I guess like all artists I like to imitate nature at her finest. My burgundy lipstick is for those special occasions when I go out for the evening and feel like a million bucks! I have a variety of shades of this particular color that I save for those special moments when I feel the evening will be like a fairy book romance. After all, as women we have to occasionally feel like the heroine in a novel that is swept away by her hero.  As a result of my chameleon ability I recommend to all my friends to  wear a color that isn’t normal for them or one that they usually don’t wear at that time of the day.  I think we should all wear colors we  normally don’t wear. All we have to do is smile our beautiful smiles and believe me, people will wonder what we’re up to.

Preparing for Spring is something I think all women should do and the best way to prepare is to get a massage, facial, pedicure or manicure. Working out the slow months with a massage can rejuvenate any dancer and doing the prepping and primping is the natural telltale of womanhood. We know that our skin needs to be soft to the touch and our hair shiny and healthy just like we need meditation for our soul so we can wake up the muse within ourselves who inspires us to dance and create  great choreographies . Pampering is a must for dancers and entertainers alike because we are more physical than the average person and working with our bodies. Bottom line is, for whimsy sake, take care of your body and enjoy the fruits of your labor in a body that glows.

Because of the mundane schedules of today’s working woman, I feel it is imperative that dance be required at the most inopportune times for all belly dancers! Dance around your desk at work, the hall to the copy machine, a wiggle in the break room and a twirl around corners. Dance to your car and blast your favorite song as you go to lunch or head home. Let the world know that under those work close a belly dancer is alive and ready to burst forth dancing. After all the belly dancer in us never sleeps, she waits for the seasons of creativity to come and go like the cycles of mother moon. Finger cymbals, drum music and a favorite song that gets the blood flowing is a way we show the world we are not mortal women but belly dancers through and through.

One thing my daughter and I do that always makes us feel good is to go see a good movie on the big screen. Popcorn, candy, hotdogs and let’s not forget the pickle, is like being a kid again. I’m a pickle junkie and for some reason pickles and movies just go together for me. The whimsy in me feels it’s good to take a break from reality and enjoy being taken away and entertained. This is especially important for people who are in their own right, entertainers because being a constant muse can exhaust even the stalwart of dancers. Taking a break just adds more fuel to the creative fire and  I always find that ideas come to me that I wouldn’t think of otherwise if I didn’t take a couple hours break.

Whimsy isn’t just a word that means dream, desire or fancy, it’s also a way of living life so that we don’t get bombarded with reality. Whimsy is chocolate in all its sugary, rich and decadent glory that reminds us one mouthful of delight at a time that life is to be tasted, savored and enjoyed even if the alarm clocks of our lives can’t be ignored.

News

Jareeda Belly Dance magazine’s next issue is Health and I know there are many of you wondering how to stay healthy during this flu season or maybe you’ve always wondered about your shakras and how they relate to your belly dancing and so much more…if so find out by subscribing to: www.jareeda.com

My book, “The Divine Unrest-My Stories and Views on Belly Dance” is now available on paperback. It’s only $12.99 so if you have a birthday coming up get my book as a gift. https://www.createspace.com/4181322

I’m finishing up on the choreography book and we will send out a special announcement when it’s available. I’m hoping it will be a good companion with “The Divine Unrest,” and my videos that are out already. Remember to check out my membership site, www.bellydancevillage.com

The post Making a Little Whimsy appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Have you ever wondered how long forever is? As a belly dancer forever is over the horizon and beyond the distant star. It’s just a saying that is until the day comes and you find yourself literally over the horizon and the distant star is the neon signs of yesterday.  What is too old in this business?

The biggest question I get asked by more people than not, even those who aren’t dancers, is what is the oldest a dancer can dance. It’s a good question and one that I never really gave much thought. Why? I mean, belly dancers in their own minds are immortal beings with ageless imaginations and creativity that is endless, bottomless and omnipotent. Who thinks about the end of something when it’s just begun or it’s running its do course.

If the mind isn’t in-sync with the body, issues can crop up even if you are in your prime as a dancer. Some of the biggest drama queens I have ever seen have been belly dancers. It’s the one drawback to drinking from the well of creativity.

I saw a dancer in Egypt who was in her late forties or early fifties, out dance a bunch of dancers half her age.  I talked about her in a post a long while ago. She was dancing with a candelabra on her head and had the most exquisite hip work I have ever seen even to this day. The audience loved her and when she was done dancing, they gave her a long applause. I have watched my dear friend Barbara Sayre Harmon dance in her studio and she had the exquisite body gestures of someone half her age besides the agility of a ballet dancer performing Swan Lake. To this day, I love watching Barbara dance because she moves in a way that is timeless. Maybe that is the key; the mind thinks there-fore the body is.  Philosophy can go hand in hand with dance because in the quest for finding the perfect moves, we end up discovering treasures that take us on adventures beyond the immediate, a journey of unforeseen answers. Some answers are more confusing than the questions, leading us further into a plot of twists and turns. A dancer’s tutelage is more than drills and combinations; it’s a quest into the deepest part of herself. Sometimes the deeper a dancer goes, the more lost she becomes. This is where instinct comes to the rescue.

A while ago I was teaching a beginner student privately. She was a beautiful girl just turning 19, with a heart of a belly dancer or so I thought. After weeks of drills, I worked on a choreography with her so I could help her understand how to place in the combinations into music. She videotaped her classes and when she would go home, she would watch the two of us dance together to help her practice. After about two weeks of being filmed, she started to come to class moody and unfocused. She told me she felt that she should have been able to dance as good as me especially since in her mind, youth played a big part in who should dance better. She thought being younger and spritier than me would be her edge and I told her that I had been dancing for years and that learning belly dance takes time to learn so that it feels natural in the body. The last class she took from me, she told me that the dance was just too hard and that she should see an improvement that was comparable to my way of dancing. I just couldn’t get through to her that she had to practice the moves and make them hers. She wanted to dance like me and I was trying to help her dance like herself by feeling the movements her way. I wanted her to copy me up until a point but then as she understood the moves, I wanted her to show me them…her way. She could do this for me in class but at home, I think her family made it difficult for her by making fun of her.  It was an uphill battle that exasperated me to no end. She ended up making an excuse for not coming to class the following week and then no contact after that. She wouldn’t return my phone calls and by that point all I wanted to do was go find her and kick her in the butt.

In the end of this particular situation I found that having years over someone younger than me was to my detriment. Actually this is a first for me but it just goes to show you how irrational some people can be when it comes to age. So in the real world of age the scales can tilt either way. As humans on this planet, age has become enemy number one. The body isn’t something we embrace with an open mind. Funny that the mind though it dwells in the body opposes and criticizes the very thing that carries and protects it. Maybe we need to take the mind out of the equation and look at the body for what it is…home.

The statement, how old is too old doesn’t make any sense in many ways. When does a painter stop painting or a sculpture stop sculpting? Some of the cowboys I worked with years ago were in their 80’s, yes that’s right, I said 80’s and nothing kept them off their horses. I always had a feeling that as soon as they decided not to ride anymore, that would be the day they died. You can’t put passion and desire on a shelf and leave it to wither away. Life doesn’t work that way.

Sometimes little signs that come from the Universe will tell people when it’s time to put the horse out to pasture and hang up the spurs. Three years ago my ex-husband who was a lot older then me decided it was time for him to pass on and leave this planet. He was a medicine man and sometimes they have this uncanny way of knowing when their time is up. He dug his own grave and within a few months after digging it, he passed away, was placed in the grave with his cowboy boots on, chaps, spurs and cowboy hat. The things in life that meant so much to him represented the life he had lived and as I thought about his life, I realized that everyone wants to be remembered for how they lived, what they did, represented and who they loved.

My mortality hit me square in the eyes when he died and I wondered how long I would dance, teach or choreograph belly dance. Would I die being buried in my belly dance costume or would I die dancing in my belly dance costume? Interesting to think about but it is a bit gloomy.

How old is too old depends on the mind set of any given person and how they feel about themselves. I actually had a friend who quit belly dancing because she thought she was too old at age 30. Can you imagine what turning 40 was like for her? I’m going to be half a century old and I feel half a century young. I’m just getting the hang of this dance form and maybe just maybe, at 90 I’ll have it licked!

Photography by the amazing Vivien Skrupskis

News

My Choreography book which will be a small book full of combinations is almost finished. It will be for the professional dancer who knows belly dance verbage but wants some combo ideas for troupe or solo performing. I thought I would share my ideas so I hope you all enjoy it. I will have it finished  by the end of this week.

Remember to subscribe to Jareeda Belly Dance Magazine. This coming issue will be on health! So just click on the link to get the longest running belly dance magazine in the US! www.jareeda.com

My book, “The Divine Unrest-My Stories and Personal Views on Belly Dance” is now available in paperback for $12.99 on Amazon.  Or, you can get The Divine Unrest on Amazon as an ebook for your Kindle. You can also read a Kindle book on your computer as well as on your iPhone, or Android by downloading the the Kindle App. 

The post How Old is Too Old? appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

It was obvious that with some of the emails I have been getting regarding my book that I felt I should talk about a topic that kept coming up which is, the art of teaching dance. The emails were full of dancers speaking openly about what my book, The Divine Unrest, did for them. Some changed studios, others left teachers that were abusive and limited. I was very surprised to get these emails and wondered what on earth was going on with teachers in this dance form. When did this start to become a common problem or has it always been in our midsts.

Years ago when I started out dancing, it never occurred to me to take class from someone who wasn’t qualified. Usually I heard by word of mouth about a dance teacher from other dancers and most of the recommended teachers were exceptional. If anyone I was paying to teach me, tried to intimidate me or belittle me in class, I would have said, “Hasta la vista baby.” Maybe it’s because I’m feisty to begin with but I wouldn’t take class from anyone who I thought was abusive. That being said for some strange reason there are women out there who are obviously get away with teaching aggressively. I have news for them; this dance form has nothing to do with intimidation or belittling. To be able to teach dance is an art and I’m wondering with so many women getting into belly dance if this isn’t creating a problem with inadequate and unqualified teachers. I’ve seen it happen in public schools because I had to face a few bad apples with my daughter through out her elementary and middle school years. The question is, is this becoming a trend and if so what can qualified dance teachers do about it?

I was watching a documentary a while back called “Miss Navajo” and was blown away by the requirements each contestant had to meet. They were judged on how well they were able to fulfill each requirement.  They had to speak their own native tongue. They had to kill a sheep and skin it because sheep are an important staple that feeds the tribe. The contestants had to then cook the meat and feed the judges and families watching. They were questioned on important dates and what different insignias meant for them as a tribe. I realized that a big problem we have is the fact that there are no tests or guidelines for teaching our dance form.

The bottom line, we need to seriously figure out a teacher training course for dancers who want to teach so that the art of the dance isn’t lost, forgotten or turned into a money making scheme. We can’t afford at this point and time in our dance history to allow anyone to muddy up the dance especially those who are not qualified to teach it to begin with. Maybe this is where certifications come in but if so there needs to be new guidelines set down especially for teaching learned content. One of the problems with our dance field is that anyone can say they are a qualified teacher, have business cards or a cheap website, and wham bam thank you ma’am, they are teaching.

Remember my issue with the teacher who stated she could make anyone a professional in less then a month? I feel sorry for anyone who buys into the delusion that learning any dance form is possible in that short a period of time. It’s a scam plain and simple but more than that she is adding to the problem by placing herself in a position of authority without asking her own peers especially those in Egypt what they think of her offer. The student who buys into any scam artists scheme, ends up not only misinformed, but sold a false education that in reality takes years of training to master. Who pays the price for poor teaching skills, the student, the community or all the above. My next question is why don’t more professional dance teachers and performers stand up and talk about this problem? Unqualified teachers will tarnish our image in many ways. The two of the biggest problems are, the uneducated dancers who become unqualified teachers and the uneducated dancers representing not only communities but cultures.

One email I received just recently really struck a cord with me. This woman was older, pretty much a senior citizen and she had been dancing for many years. She took from two teachers. Her first was verbally abusive so she left here and the second one while she really enjoyed studying with her, was smothering her creativity. What happens to a flame when it gets no oxygen, it burns out. If a teacher doesn’t allow students to create their own choreographies, they will never understand the relationship between music and movement. It can’t be learned by just watching, it has to be learned by doing it and not just taught choreographies. After the fundamentals are taught, it’s important to get students to that place where the creative juices are flowing. Her teacher wouldn’t allow her to perform in certain venues and her creativity was suffering for it. What kind of teacher doesn’t allow her students to express themselves? Her teacher never gave her a good reason why. Why do we give our power away to those who don’t deserve it?

The only way a beginner can grow in any dance field is to learn the dance or studio curriculum by moving with dance, listening to music and then moving and listening to music at the same time. In the beginning it’s in the understanding of how a student learns to extend and restrain the body in movement and from this she be able to start to understand how to feel and react to music. But what if the teacher is afraid her students will eventually come up with something better then her? Limiting students will do one or two things, it will cause them to look else where to express their creativity or they will stay as limited as their teacher.

Dance teachers need to research, travel and explore their dance not only for their own sake but for the future education of generations they are teaching. This isn’t a self absorbed dance form, it’s based on community and keeping alive an ancient art form that has been passed down for multiple generations. It’s about going outside the comfort zone of the known into the unknown and finding that everything you learn is familiar to you already. It’s about relearning our heritage as women and understanding that it’s not about one person but about all of us sharing our joy of dance so we can go out into the world with a little more laughter, a little more light and an abundance of confidence.

What do you think?

 News Update: 

“The Divine Unrest-My Stories and Personal Views on Belly Dance” is out in paperback! The black and white paperback is only $12.99.  Here’s the link on

https://www.createspace.com/4181322

Remember to go to www.bellydancevillage and discover the wonderful art of belly dance!

The post The Art of Teaching Belly Dance appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

After writing my book, I got to thinking about how important it is for dancers to reassess their belly dance careers and why it’s even necessary. I guess it’s because I came full circle after writing my book and realized I didn’t have anyone say, “What do you think of belly dance now that you have been doing it for so many years?”

This past week, I have talked to two friends who have been in the belly dance business a long time and they are finally coming to terms with their mortality in this business. It’s almost as if experiences and memories are squashed away by fears tumbling into their protected sanctuaries, crashing into the walls of accomplishments. A woman seeing herself for the age she really is, will unintentionally find holes and cracks in the once flawless and alluring representation of her image and career. It’s always been the feminine faux paw to have such an uncanny ability to be able to see what isn’t there or to see what no one else can. This has nothing to do with age but more so the feminine quandary of social standards, expectations and unrealistic beauty. Age is thrown in there as the final blow or better yet the last nail in the coffin. So what’s the difference between too old in this business versus old school?

How many dancers think about ten years down the road in their belly dance careers? I’ll use myself as an example, I didn’t because I was dealing with the day to day and week to week opportunities that presented themselves to me. I thought that each opportunity would somehow magically hand hold me up the ladder of success. What each opportunity did do was take me on winding and twisting roads that sometimes were going in the wrong direction. I took the long way around in making decisions that should have been obvious choices for success. Success doesn’t always show itself in a white carriage and it doesn’t stop at your doorstep just because you are dressed for the ball. Most of the time decisions are made with the hope that the outcome will not only be positive but lucrative. Belly dance can be a gamble because for every woman out in the world who wants to belly dance and be successful, there are thousands of dancers wanting the same thing and many of them are more aggressive and determined.

So for reasons that make themselves known in their own good time, it’s important for any of us to address where we are in our dance careers. When I first started out dancing, if anyone would have told me I was going to be a writer for belly dance magazines, have my own blog post and write a book, I would have looked at them cross-eyed and said they were crazy. But that is only because I was so focused on learning this dance form that it was all I could see. And to think about it, this is precisely why many young students of belly dance don’t understand the opines of older dancers because their fresh eyes only see the immediate lure of hope and aspirations that tease them with glimpses of what could be or what might be. The unknown is vague and with nothing written on the walls yet, anything is possible.

I’m not saying have a check list for everything you have done and go down it checking it off with yes or no. I’m  really talking about the bucket list that is important too because while both lists are apart of society, the latter is created from the explorer and curiosity seekers desires. Egypt was the ultimate highlight as was climbing one of the queen’s pyramids but dancing for the Gypsy Kings was up there too. Dancing for Egyptologists Salima Ikram, Bob Brier, Aidan Dodson and Kara Cooney (Discovery Channel, Out of Egypt) was beyond what I ever thought I would accomplish. Now, I have my book that is my pride and joy so who knows what’s next.

The writing on the wall becomes a testament to a dancers life that even she has to stand back from so she can see it in it’s full entirety. And I must say that standing back and seeing accomplishments, failures and everything in between means really just two things…that you lived and you did it your way.

Divine Unrest to be Available on Paperback

We are really excited about getting the book made into a paperback so for those who prefer to read and touch the pages, it’s coming. I’m like that myself, I love to touch the pages and smell new books. We will let everyone know when the book is available but if you are interested in getting a paperback contact Daniel at: bellydancehusband@leyla-najma.com

Podcast, Traveling the Silkroad with Leyla Najma and Jareeda

My podcast show will be called, “Traveling the Silkroad with Leyla Najma”  and I’ll give you a hint…pajama’s, hot tea and messy hair. Well that’s me while I’m talking.

I am now officially a staff writer for Jareeda Belly Dance magazine so go check out the newest issue that just came out by going to www.jareeda.com

The post Reassessing your Belly Dance Career appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

I knew if some of you read this, you might be wondering why I would even ask such a question, but I am asking because there is so much more to belly dance that as you get older and seasoned, you understand. Skills like anything take time to polish and shine and let’s not forget years to understand but does knowing how to extend and move with no effort come from skill? A thought can be so much more when the body takes it and expands on it. What of body language? Do we live our lives speaking verbally or do we express ourselves through a look, a feeling or a gesture? As a woman I know that I can get across a particular feeling to Daniel with one look. So I think body language is a natural evolution that comes with being human.

Performance skills are a very personal matter because everyone’s skills differ depending on what they value and deem important. And we have to remember that who we learn from in any aspect of instruction, shares their view on what skills are most important to them. We learn to train and practice according to what our teachers instruct and we take home the first component of skills that become apart of our dance. But what about natural ability and the creative license to dance an individual expression that takes the dance, say in this instance belly dance to a different direction than originally accepted? We have Goth, and Burlesque mixed in with belly dance along with jazz and tap. Performance skills can be unfair especially when a life long dancer comes in and trains with the Olympian speed of Hera and enjoys the fruits of her labor faster than the average student. It can get disconcerting studying along side this type of dancer especially when a student is putting her all into learning how to dance.  It’s hard not to compare oneself with someone who not only gets every move down but does them with a pros proficiency.

Personally as a dance teacher, I love life long professional dancers coming to class but then that is only because I have spent years learning this dance and I don’t have to compete with them. When I take workshops it’s another story, my right becomes my left and I look like a clueless zombie. I love learning new moves and combinations but as I have always stated, I don’t like learning a full choreography within a few hours. My skill level goes out the window and my ego takes a beating. I had a student who was taking a workshop class with me and she was able to get the moves instantly. I on the other hand fumbled through the choreography finally getting it at the end. She laughed at me as I gave her a cross eyed look but I have to admit I was really proud of her besides being impressed and a little envious. She came over to me and put her arms around my shoulders and told me that  because of all the drills and oppositions moves that I made her do, she was  able to catch on to choreography a lot easier. That did make me feel a little bit better and I realized something after I chewed on what she had said. I was so busy choreographing moves and combinations on a day to day basis that to move to music with someone else’s inspired ideas, felt strange to my creative process. Don’t get me wrong, I love to watch and see how dancers put together moves but I realized that because I do this day in and day out, I had isolated my learning ability. At workshops, I would do the combinations asked of me but at the same time think to myself, “But wait, you missed this beat and oh, oppositions moves would work beautifully here.” So it occurred to me that I had to turn off my internal dialogue and just enjoy being in the midst of creative expression no matter who it came from.

How much do props help out with performance skills? I watched a dancer do a beautiful veil dance years ago, one that is probably the prettiest I’ve ever seen. Her articulation was amazing and it felt at times as if she was flying or floating over the stage. Once she was done with her veil dance, she did a drum solo. The performance of one versus the other was day and night.  I couldn’t believe she was the same dancer who I had been watching previously with the veil. She missed the boat on her drum solo and as I watched her struggle with her hip work, I realized that the first prop a dancer should master is her body. If we can’t showcase the skill and training with our bodies to the audience then it doesn’t matter how well we do with a veil, sword or candelabra, what a dancer lacks in ability will be magnified ten fold on stage.

I was at the ten year mark when I saw this dancer perform and I realized that I had to get back to the basics so that my body felt like my work of art, my creativity molded from one combination to the next. I didn’t want to do an incomplete performance especially since I was working with live bands at that time. This is where studying Taheya Carioca, Naima Akef, Samia Gamall, Suhair Saki and Nagua Fouad came in handy. I thought to myself, what was it that all these women had in common that not only made them stand out but become stars? After watching them for awhile I came to this conclusion, they had this amazing ability to bring their audience in with their movements and the subtle innuendos of their body language. Even if they were only moving their hips, they made it look like what they were doing was the coolest thing anybody had ever seen. They lived in their movements, they emulated this joy on stage so that everyone focused and lived in their performance, impatiently waiting for the next move. It was within this ability to tell a story with their hips alone that made me realize movement wasn’t just a skill, it was a thought, a feeling of inspiration caught into a thrust, maya or figure 8. The movement had to come from the storyteller herself and how she emulated the move and expressed it to the audience, demonstrated what kind of storyteller she was. The mind set was, “I think therefore I am.” So it occurred to me that if I am true to my feelings on stage and I emulate how I live life in my movements, than half the battle has been won. Skill takes this thought process and magnifies the movements in a way that becomes a beacon to the audience. So I ask you, can it be so simple to think that thought felt in movement can make all the difference?

What does a professional have over a beginner dancer, confidence obviously. Isn’t confidence a thought or feeling that comes from experience and experience makes movement look skilled and flawless. So my question in the very beginning isn’t so much a cut and dry answer as it is contemplative. Performance skills don’t come from technique alone because  becoming a robot isn’t what most dancer’s have in their minds when they perform. We can follow each other to the best of our ability but eventually down the line movement has to become one with the body. When you have a technical dancer perform side by side with a storyteller, the difference is one feels her movements and lives in them while the other demonstrates verbatim a technical choreographed copy. Now I know there will be some of you who are technical dancers who won’t agree with me and I have seen technical dancers do beautiful dances on stage but the difference is in the pudding when you watch the old black and white videos of Egyptian dancers. Technique is needed and a major part of learning any dance form because it helps dancers lay down their foundation. As time goes by technique builds layer upon layer to strengthen a dancer’s foundation but at the same time it can take away from the spontaneous elements of feeling creativity.

Performance skills are in the eyes of the beholder meaning  the appreciative audience or the beginner student all the way down the line to the seasoned dancer. Let’s be frank, I’ll use myself as an example, some people think I suck at dancing while others think I’m the coolest thing since sliced bread. It all depends on their view of what performance skills represent and I am no different here. I have seen professional dancers that were lukewarm on stage while others gave me goose bumps.

So for me, I like to see technique in the background in performances and I prefer the story told by the emotional joy of a dancer up front and center. Performance skills represent the journey a dancer takes to get to her goals and aspirations. Skills take a dancer to the jump off point but eventually the dancer has to take a leap of faith knowing in the end she has always known how to fly.

Tell me your thoughts on this topic…I always enjoy different points of view!!

News

I am excited to let everyone know that I am writing exclusively for Jareeda Belly Dance Magazine and that I am focusing all my interests and abilities in order to write the best articles I can for Mezdulene the publisher of Jareeda. I feel rejuvinated and inspired this year and I’m ready to shine my diamond a little bit more!! Remember, when you subscribe to Jareeda, you are supporting the longest running belly dance magazine in existence today.  Go to www.jareeda.com

Also remember my book is out, “The Divine Unrest-My Stories and Personal Views on Belly Dance” and it’s available on Amazon. Just click on the book cover button to the right. I am getting ready to do more interviews for Belly Dance Viillage so be on the look out for them down the line. If you haven’t checked out my instructional videos go to www.bellydancevillage.com and get the best for all levels pf belly dance instruction!!

The post Are Performance Skills Overrated? appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

Imagine this, you walk into a dressing room with five belly dancers standing in front of mirrors and you wonder what do they really see or what do they really think…of themselves. Within these past 25 years of dancing, I have always wondered what the little voices in everyone’s heads were saying especially in a room full of women. Remember the movie, “City of Angels” with Meg Ryan and Nicolas Cage? There was a scene where people’s private and most intimate dialogues could be heard and each Angel listened in trying to give comfort where comfort was needed. What would it be like for any of us to really take a good look at our own dialogues and see what we constantly say about ourselves? How do we know if the image looking back at us from the mirror is a true representation of who we really are?

Have you ever wondered why we make New Year’s resolutions each year and by the years end our outcomes are immensely different than our original thoughts and intentions? I think it all has to do with those little voices in our head telling us that no matter what, we are still the same person year after year and the end results will never change or if they do, take a tenacity never before seen. Is it really the ego talking or is it the insecurities of our self image that sabotages our well intentioned efforts. One thing I know for sure, the belly dancer on stage is not always the same woman back in the dressing room looking at herself in the mirror. Dance allows us to put up a façade that allows no secrets to escape because once a dancer is up on stage the entertainer in them takes over. The safety net is the performance, the in the moment pull of the audience, lights and music that helps to keep the entertainer on top of her game.

But what happens when we walk in the front doors of our homes and plop down on the couch…are we really the same person that was up on stage just hours ago? I have left the house half pissed off about something, drive to my restaurant gig, perform and come home with a different attitude. So obviously dance can help in different areas of a dancer’s life but how many times do we separate the dancer from the every day woman because we don’t want the two mixed together? Could they help each other? The dancer in me always had her $#it together and I knew how to dress and enter the front doors of any establishment, engage in any number of conversations and end with two shows under my belt and drive home. But my question is, is the dancer really me or another personality coming through? Many times when I was “off” from being the celebrity belly dancer, I would crash at home exhausted. And I often wondered was it because I was selective in my timing, basically making it clear to myself that there was a correct time to bring out the belly dancer and a time to put her away. If I am always willing to put away the belly dancer for more appropriate times, will it leave a mark perhaps a habitual habit that imprints itself onto my self image? I know I am both the average woman and belly dancer but if I look closely to those hidden voices in my head, I tend to favor the belly dancer because she is after all the closest I have ever come to being my ideal of the perfect woman. The rest of the week, I am just me, mortal and in my eyes average and maybe just a bit boring. It’s in this separatist state of mind that the problems start to perpetuate into cracked and disassociated issue that weigh so heavily on my persona that more cracks emerge from the pressure. In the end, the image looking back at me is always disassociated from the true image that I am. When I look into any mirror, I see insecurities, phobias from past experiences, other peoples voiced opinions of what I don’t have or what I can’t do and it’s interesting that the voices that speak the loudest in my head are those from so many years ago.

It’s not just admitting that I see myself cracked because even an alcoholic can admit they have a problem but do nothing more than just admit to it. To say it, is one thing, to do something about it is another. It’s in the actual process of recapitulation and soul searching that we find the answers that make us whole again besides understanding those experiences that lead us to our disassociated place of acceptance. Remember in the “Black Swan” how the mind took images and made them seem to a certain extent, real. I often wonder if the various cracks we see in our mind, mirrors the impacts of yielding to views that are not our own, consequently making the lines that appear before our eyes our own doing. If we look at something long enough, even if it’s not true, we start to believe it is true. The mirror becomes a distorted view of borrowed opinions that become a twisted and grotesque sculpture that is not of our own design.

An entertainer has to know that her or his journey is harder to travel than most because of fans and audiences expectations of great performances time after time. As I have always said, the audience hates to be disappointed and with today’s technology, they can even take on a troll mentality writing comments that sting. For example, year’s ago I remember a writer came to a play I co-produced called, “The Pearl Fantasy.” A year’s hard work went into the production and all of our dancers and actors spent a year working on making the show a success. Yet the writer, who congratulated everyone after the show in the reception hall, wrote a scathing review that made me wonder what his motive was. Perhaps my mirror cracked a bit more that day not because I don’t believe in free speech but because how could I not take it personally when my creative efforts were mixed into the pot with everyone else’s. The show was partially my baby, nurtured day after day with tireless efforts and sleepless nights. The investment into my creativity was high so it’s no wonder I wanted to punch him in the face. When we create a play, dance, piece of art and someone else proclaims that our creative efforts aren’t good enough; we have to find a way so that we don’t look in the mirror adding more distorted opinions to our image. Once creativity is out for people to view, it’s the risk the artist takes. So I finally understood that opinions people make are from their view of the world and sometimes they are just as cracked or fragmented as me.  The difference is simple, how I deal with a situation says so much about who I am and how cracked my mirror is. 

Let’s get real, as women we have different agendas attached to us since birth. How skinny, pretty and talented a woman is sometimes can be more important then how smart and motivated she is. I have been skinny, chubby and back again since my teenage years and I have found that most people don’t treat me any differently. I finally realized that I am the one that reacts differently to people because of my insecurity about being overweight. This is where the dialogue starts talking in my head about what people really think of how I look. I hear what I am thinking and attach it to what they say creating a between the lines problem that doesn’t really exist. So after seeing this bizarre insecurity, I decided to look at myself in the mirror and tell my body how proud I am of it and how thankful I am it’s healthy and able to do all the things I need it to do.   

I don’t think we have to go back in the womb to change our habitual way of seeing life but I do think it’s important for everyone to stand back from the general highway and see if what they believe, see and feel is conducive to a happy, loving and prosperous future. I saw how I blindsided myself in certain areas and I finally came to the conclusion that even though it wasn’t a literal hit or block, I could still feel the residual pain and see how it affected my attitude towards my body image, confidence and business intentions. We have to stop the runaway train that in the end is the ghost of inhibitions that were collected along the way of experiencing life. A good starting point is to see yourself in the mirror and take the time to look at who you are in the moment. How you respond to your image can be a gauge as to how well you are really doing with your relationship with yourself.

 “Home is a place in the mind. When it is empty, it frets. It is fretful with memory, faces and places and times gone by. Beloved images rise up in disobedience and make a mirror for emptiness.”

MAEVE BRENNAN, The Visitor

If we stray away from the comforts of the temple or home, it’s an obvious risk that we will forget our way back to the comforting fires of our beginnings. I understand this because when I was in Egypt, I always seemed to find my way to destinations and I learned quickly how to get to places, even side roads the taxi drivers didn’t know about. I felt I was home the months I lived there so it never entered my mind that I was lost at any given time. I was as content as any woman could be and my body, soul and mind made my emotional state a happy one. My hair grew in leaps and bounds, my nails were the longest I have ever had them and my skin was a healthy glow. I would wake up excited about the unknown journey of the day. I was as complete and whole as I have ever been. The hard part for me now is to bring about those same elated emotions into an every day way of life. Perhaps if we make the journey within ourselves just as exciting, we will always be in a place where we are whole. The image looking back at us in the mirror can be a constant reminder that the cracks in the mirror are only visible if we choose to see them. The bottom line is our image is what we choose to see, either the end result of what we do to keep the illusion or fragmented belief alive or how we glow with the wholeness of knowing we never left home. Home is not only where the heart is, home is where we are guided by our creativity that is unwavering and absolute.

‘Home is the place that goes where you go, yet it welcomes you upon your return. Like a dog overjoyed at the door. We’ve missed you is what you hear, no matter how long you’ve been gone.”

MICHAEL J. ROSEN, Home

News!

Remember that Jareeda Belly Dance magazine is coming very soon, as a matter of fact it went to print on Monday so those of you excited about getting your issue, the wait is almost over!! www.jareeda.com

Also this year I have made some changes and I have decided to write exclusively  for Jareeda and I am very excited to be working with Mezdulene and her amazing magazine. My  focus and efforts will be with Jareeda and Mezdulene so look for new and exciting articles coming up from the longest running belly dance magazine to date!

Also, again I want to thank everyone who has supported my book coming out and for all those people who did the reviews for Amazon. I really appreciate it so those of you who want to buy my book, “The Divine Unrest-My Stories and Personal Views on Belly Dance,” here’s the link: http://www.amazon.com/The-Divine-Unrest-Personal-ebook/dp/B00AB77Y1U

Here’s info on my classes starting at Continuing Ed/UNM in March. Go to DCE.UNM.EDU my class number is 12788 and my class name is, Hip Phylosophy. If you are local the number to register is 505-277-0077 and if you need any help from me just email me at leyla-leyla-najma.com

The post Is the Mirror Cracked? appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

This New Year is going to be a full one with our new podcast show, a choreography book and studio classes starting in March. The podcast will be something new for me and since I like to talk (according to Daniel) so it should be a lot of fun. The podcast will be comparative to an audio blog that is connected to iTunes and will be apart of our app. We’ll let everyone know the title of the show and when to expect the first broadcast. I have ideas in my head of what I want to talk about but if any of you have ideas, send them to me and maybe your idea will be used in up coming shows. I’m not going to stick to just dance because there is so much life that is experienced outside of dance which includes economy, health, weight, people psychology, family issues and values and the list goes on. The podcasts will be anywhere from 10 minutes to possibly two hours, it just depends on the topic of the day.

I have Sakti Rinek coming up for the bellydancevillage video interview. Sakti has been dancing for almost 40 years. I think you will find her life exciting because Sakti lived the belly dance dream. She traveled all over the world performing in top hotels and nightclubs besides creating a wonderful belly dance costume business. BDV members expect the video coming up by the end of this month. Its one interview you won’t want to miss! But remember there are awesome and amazing women who I have already interviewed so check out the videos and sit back and enjoy their stories, philosophy on life and much more!

The choreography book will be a compilation of combinations and drills for intermediate to advanced dancers and teachers. We are doing something different with the book, I am including some of my instructional videos to accompany it. It’s almost done since I already had most of my combinations in text so it’s just a matter of me finishing up the chapter details and organizing the combinations in a way that is understandable. I’m excited and feel that my combinations including traveling steps will be an added spice (chili pepper hot) for solo dancers or troupes.

On another note, my book “The Divine Unrest-My Stories and Personal Views on Belly Dance” is doing great and we want to thank all the well wishers and those of you who did reviews on my book. We really appreciate it and I hope that as the word gets out, dancers will be able to relate it with their own dance journeys.

In some ways I feel a little lost  because editing and re-editing my book was such a major part of my days and long nights. The night owl in me had a great time working on the book but the morning zombie part of me could never get up. And did I mention, I looked like a zombie? My daughter says the book had nothing to do with it…I look that way every morning. But I’ll choose to ignore her comment!

On the class home front, I will be teaching a dance course at UNM Continuing Education starting 3/5/2013-4/9/2013 here in Albuquerque. My dance class will be  based on my curriculum, Hip Phylosophy. For those of you who are here in my area, it will be beginner combos and drills but class time includes  intermediate tid bits plus it goes fast so each class is a good work out. Call me for more info: 505-459-8015 or write me at Leyla@leyla-najma.com if you have any questions. We’ll focus on mirror opposite combos and layering besides some cool traveling steps to really mix the brain up! It will be fun so remember to bring your sense of humor besides your hip scarf.

Update! For local students convenience:

I’m adding in additional info for my classes at Continuing Ed/UNM. If you are a local student or dancer you can register online at http://dce.unm.edu and go to the search button and type in my class number 12788 or my class name Hip Phylosophy to register. The easiest way is to phone in for class and the number is 505-277-0077. Just give them my class name or number.

Embracing the Divine Feminine

Calling all Goddesses, Sprites and women of belly dance, Mezdulene, publisher of Jareeda (the oldest running belly dance magazine today) is offering classes called, “Embracing the Divine Feminine.”

1. Connect to your personal Divine Feminine.

2. Learn how to stay conscious and aware of your Divine Feminine.

3. Learn how to put this aspect into action to create a better life for yourself, for others and ultimately humanity.

4. Become empowered as we learn how to change the world.

5. Experience joy!

Mezdulene’s intent is to help you become a woman of true power, to accept your ability to birth the changes you want in your life, and to support you in this sacred work. These classes will be interactive and will give time for questions and answers.

This would be a great time to bring in this kind of class especially for those dancers who want to give more to their communities and I must say give back to themselves a gift of self love. The best way to dance is from a place of love and light and I feel Mezdulene’s classes would make our dance world and community a better place. For more info contact Mezdulene at: Jareeda@jareeda.com

Let’s create a more peaceful, beautiful and prosperous year and one where I get to meet some of the amazing women who are apart of our dance world. This year, I’m heading out and ready to dance with you and enjoy the creative world of belly dance!

Photo by the amazing Vivien Skrupskis

The post Podcast, Choreography Book, Dance Classes and more appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Free Belly Dancing Instructional Video

Not too long ago we produced a series of very short belly dancing instructional videos specifically for the Belly Dancing Leyla Style mobile app for the Android and iPhone.

This one will be on the mobile app along with the others. I’m posting it on my blog as a way of celebrating the season with you all and to say thanks for your comments, feedback and participation on my blog.

Leyla,

PS: This video is enabled for embedding so feel free to grab the embed code and add it to your website for your visitors if you choose.

The post Free Belly Dancing Hip Combination Video – Goddess Sati appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

The belly dancers dilemma, I think finds its way into the life of a belly dancer eventually, slowly at first but front and center as time passes. For some time, the belly dancer in me has been pondering the idea of just teaching and eventually retiring from dancing publically. It’s only a thought at this point but one that has been on the back burner for awhile. Many moons and pounds ago, I lived to dance and dreamed of dance combinations and choreographies in my sleep. Though I am doing my part in staying healthy, it just seems as if now in my life I want to look at what makes women tick and why we are the way we are.

Let’s face it, most men or partners find us the unsolvable enigma of all time. Sometimes when I wake up in a “mood” I wonder where the hell I came from too. But that doesn’t happen very often and I have come to realize that many of my issues have come from what I have allowed to rule my self image. I’m not a Barbie Doll and to be honest, that would take too much time out of my day to keep up an impossible image that wasn’t mine to begin with. So maybe I’ve gotten lazy in my older age and the up keep of performing is not on the top of my priority list. Belly dancers do take pride in their appearance especially when they are decked out in their costumes and feeling every bit the modern day Cleopatra.

Since I’ve written “The Divine Unrest” I feel I have come full circle and now I am faced with a fork in the road. One direction is to lecture which is what I am starting to do with Continuing Ed at UNM next year or BDV dance workshops starting early spring. Both are very appealing at this moment and to be honest it would be great to have my cake and eat it too. Understanding the drive and desires of belly dancers at this juncture in my dance career is an appealing venture because there is so much hidden and unspoken. It’s not so much that as belly dancers we hide away our desires, it’s the reality of a competitive environment that can cause a few tumbles and pot holes along the way. Let’s face it; drama mixed with emotional stress can drive any normal woman or man to the brink of madness or despair. Passion doesn’t include or allow exasperating elements because its true nature is only to forecast clear skies. Passion is the rose colored glasses of any artist but only because a true artist has to have an untainted view of her or his desires to even gain the courage to pursue their dreams and aspirations.

I remember the day I got on a horse, my heart was beating a mile a minute and I was trying to feel the gait of my horse as she went into a trot and then into a full gallop. If I would have known my horse was skittish to begin with, I probably wouldn’t have had the courage to ride her. I was 12 at the time and at that moment I only allowed my desire and passion to guide me. I wanted to ride like a true cowgirl and that’s all I could see and feel at the time. As I look back at my cowgirl years, it’s amazing I lived through it all. I was caught in a severe lightning storm in Colorado, rode along by default with a stampeding herd of wild Mexican steers in the Big Bend part of Texas, worked with Brahma bulls and dealt with them fighting, taking down trees, fences and each other. I fell off cliffs, was bucked off more times than I can remember and just like in the movies, as I was chasing a wild steer at a full gallop into a brushy area with trees, I was left unceremoniously hanging from a huge branch from a tree that came out of nowhere. My horse galloped ahead without me and I was left trying to figure out how to get down out of a tree that had prickly bushes around it. If I would have known ahead of time all these experiences were waiting for me…well I doubt it would have stopped me but I probably would have been a nervous wreck the whole time I worked cattle.

Belly dance hasn’t really been any different and if you all read my book, you’ll find I have quite a few stories of my experiences in my book. I felt it was important to share the good, the bad and the hysterically funny with everyone. Sometimes it felt like the belly dance bloopers were no different than my skirmishes I experienced working cattle except the only difference was horns coming at me versus cameras, pointing fingers, hysterical laughter. I’m not sure at this point which was worse but at least with working cattle I could call it a day and not think about it. With both belly dancing and working cattle, I know that surviving experiences and retelling stories makes it all seem surreal almost like an adventure novel. Maybe that’s why we love belly dancing because there are no guidelines or a set of directions telling us where to go or what to expect. I think it’s obvious as women we prefer it this way and this is part of that enigma phenomenon that has men and partners baffled.

I’m not saying that dance isn’t appealing anymore just like I wouldn’t say working cattle doesn’t interest me anymore, what I am saying is that sometimes there’s a fork in the road for a reason. There are different aspects to belly dance that I never thought of before which for me are now the jewels that sparkle and gleam. The psychology of women and the artistry of this dance is calling to me. We can bring a diverse group of people together through our laughter which can be considered a calling, an announcement of our dance along with our costumes showcasing and celebrating the feminine in all our glory. Maybe as the years pass, we discover that belly dance is more than just dance; she is a life long calling that eventually presents hidden doors of intrigue, luring us to discover the ancient and historical script of dance. The doctrines of tribes aren’t always written but past down through generations beckoning them with words which is why belly dance can be so interesting. To embark on journeys far and wide, to discover meaning to movement beyond the immediate, to find tradition alive and brought into the modern age, is all apart of the belly dancers quest. Sometimes we have to understand within any quest, passion isn’t just for performing but for understanding the journeys meaning.

The educated belly dancer is more than the finest gem of her community, she is the encyclopedia of information that will keep alive and nurture the reservoirs that will feed the passions of generations to come. Perhaps for a belly dancer, her journey is full of forks along many roads because this dance isn’t about one culture, one people, one tradition, it’s about life and how societies have evolved for thousands of years.

Walking the belly dancers path isn’t always about dance, it’s about taking the time to understand the roots and purpose of the dance, sitting down around a camp fire and re-telling the stories of times forgotten and imparting knowledge that will make a performance on stage not just beautiful but meaningful. So this is my belly dancers dilemma, to explore the unknown regions of belly dance and our feminine heritage or to spread the joy of dance through workshops enjoying the passions of dancers far and wide. One thing I know for sure…either way I win!

News

Remember the Holidays this year especially since it’s the year of new beginnings since the Mayan Calendar is ending. I believe wonderful things are going to happen and so I am excited for the coming New Year. In Celebration my book The Divine Unrest  would be a great gift  to buy a friend or a special someone who loves dance or is a dance enthusiast.

It’s at an amazing price of only $8.99 on Amazon Kindle. Just click on the book cover and get a copy today or click here to get “The Divine Unrest” on Kindle

The post The Belly Dancers Dilemma appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Most of the time when music ends, it’s easy to know how to end a performance but in saying this, one must know how to hear music especially if it’s composed and based on various cultures esthetics, traditions and past history. There have been articles in magazines regarding how to approach a stage, where to position yourself and what kind of lights to use but for me I always wanted to know where and how to end. And I use to wonder, was there a protocol to ending a performance. It seemed like standing there at the end and bowing never seemed to be enough and yet I have ended this way with various performances.

Sometimes allowing the lights and sound to slowly fade away gives the performance more ambiance and meaning to an audience. It’s obvious that there can be more to invoking a response out of people so lights along with sound are a good match. But understanding what kind of lights to use can be confusing especially for the beginner performer. I think with choreography, it’s important to know the ending of a specific song so that an idea can come into fruition. I like turning my back to the audience with the lights slowly fading out. Sometimes I’ve done dramatic drops with a blackout as soon as I hit the floor. One performance I walked off the stage slowly but I didn’t feel comfortable doing this and only did it once but it was good to try it out. It just didn’t feel like me. I guess I’m just one of those choreographers who likes to figure out how to end in a way that lets the audience know, it’s the end of the story. Sometimes people can get really confused if they don’t know an entertainer is at the end of her performance.

Years ago I can remember an early bird show during the afternoon which featured up and coming dancers and first time performers. I really enjoy dance debuts because there is always something so raw about a first performance. I loved when the débuting dancers would end; the smile of triumph always captivated the audience. The ending always justified the means but then there were performances that I never knew when the ending was near especially if they used modern music that didn’t have a traditional ending. I have always felt that if the audience has to work to know when to applaud than the choreographer has slightly missed the boat. There should be no doubt in anybodies mind, the performance has ended.

When I worked on productions, they were a treasure trove of information because dance plays have to signal to the audience that the scene is finished. I remember one gaffe that we had in a scene where we had a live singer come in and sing acapella (without instrumental accompaniment) and because we didn’t do the lighting correctly, the audience didn’t know to applaud for her. The next scene came and she was left with an awkward silence. I always felt like that was one of the main blunders of my learning experience regarding lights and scene changes. There is so much at our fingertips with lights and dance that creating the ambiance, can be like taking the audiences mood, guiding them into a spiral of emotions, accents, with slow paced introverted movements than exploding into a fast paced momentum of turns and hip undulations.

Lights and dance together bring a production into a different category because the audience can pace themselves according to the direction of the ambiance the movements articulate within each choreographed piece. The choreographer whether performing for dramatic theater or dance plays and let’s face it even restaurant performing has to consider the lighting. I think this is fundamental in the entertainment business. Now ending a performance does have a lot to do with this because there usually is a method or idea within the choreography. The space or theme can really bring out elements that help out in knowing how to leave the stage but if lighting is available, it is the icing on the cake. One rule of thumb is to always ask what kind of lighting you will be exposed to and if they will have someone working the lights. Also know what colors are best for you on stage.

Years ago I remember watching an early bird workshop show entitled the stars of tomorrow including dance débuts. I loved watching first time performers because at the end of their performances, their smiles of triumph always brought the crowd to an uproariously enthusiastic applause. It was at this particular show that I saw for the first time a performance that had virtually no ending so as the dancer stood there waiting for her applause, nobody applauded because no one knew she was finished. She had to bow in order for everyone to understand she was done. I saw the embarrassment on her face and I really think that she thought many of the people in the audience would know her music. Which brings to mind, don’t ever think people in the audience even if they are dancers will know your music. I have heard many songs in shows that I knew but when you look at individual choreographies, they tend to give a particular song a different flavor. I learned early on that from beginning to end, the choreography has to include everything so that all the audience has to do is just sit back and enjoy the show.

Something else that comes to mind is how many dancers stay long enough on stage to really enjoy the applause? Sometimes right after a performance, as quickly as I can, I run off stage. How long do we stay on stage? I wouldn’t want to be on stage after everyone applauds so that’s why I think I run off. But it’s important to look out at the audience and with a big smile say thank you. If anything, the audience will remember the dancer who entertained them and thanked them.

News

Remember the Holidays this year especially since it’s the year of new beginnings since the Mayan Calendar is ending. I believe wonderful things are going to happen and so I am excited for the coming New Year. In Celebration my book The Divine Unrest  would be a great gift  to buy a friend or a special someone who loves dance or is a dance enthusiast.

It’s at an amazing price of only $8.99 on Amazon Kindle. Just click on the book cover and get a copy today or click here to get “The Divine Unrest” on Kindle 

The post Knowing How to End a Performance appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

The individual choreographer goes through so much in order to dance her inspiration; it’s almost a daily ritual of trial and error that places her into the realm of the artiste. The first telltale signs that a choreographer is born is when he or she braves the stage performance after performance, knowing that it’s only for a few brief moments each time. It’s not the end result of the applause so much as it is the freedom to express an individual inspiration from beginning to end…their way.

Sometimes I listen to a song over and over again and wait for it to give me subliminal images and ideas for various combinations and hip movements. I have always felt music must be heard in a way that allows it to whisper directly into the ear of the artiste. Combinations and hip articulation work together but to me, they aren’t necessarily one and the same. Layering for example isn’t always brought in on accents because sometimes the melody can call for movement that is the visual beacon that becomes familiar to the audience because it’s repeated. Since the melody can be the poetic expressive part of the music, it’s not always about traveling or hip work. So in order to understand music, I think we have to understand the culture that it comes from.

So when I put together combinations especially for my students, I try to put together different ideas that call to them and inspires them to change them up, their way. The choreographer is born not so much from dancing to someone else’s choreography but from understanding how to feel movement to music in the way they hear it. The hard part for beginners to beginner/intermediates is having the courage to create an individually inspired dance that tells the world how they hear the music. I remember my first choreographed dance emotionally was between a victorious triumph and a horrific nightmare. It was the first time I was responsible for what I performed and if it didn’t pan out or if the audience showed disappointment there was no teacher to hide behind, it was all mine.

The naked feeling on stage is the hardest part to get used to because in the end it’s really about how your body moves to music; it’s your interpretation of how the music inspires you. This is the part of choreography that isn’t easy to discuss because it has to be experienced first hand to understand it. I have told my students the various emotions they might feel with their first debut performance but nothing I ever say compares to what they tell me afterwards. I have found this is because they experience life through their own understanding of fear, elation and for each one; there can be a million meanings to life. The completion and success of dreams that come true, always shows in their eyes but it’s their story of how it all happened. This to me is the reward for being a teacher and the reason for teaching.

So with the joy of remembering my student’s who became choreographers born and dancers in their own right and in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I’m going to share a combination with all of you. Take it and mix it up to your hearts delight and enjoy.

 Thanksgiving Combo:

Right Hip Maya/Backward Stomach Roll/Left Hip Side Thrust/Right Hip Side Thrust/Right Side Forward-Side-Back/3 Step Turn/Right Hip Down-Up-Out/Left Side Thrust/Right Side Thrust

Left Hip Maya/Backward Stomach Roll/Right Hip Side Thrust/ Left Hip Side Thrust/Left Side Forward-Side-Back/3 Step Turn/Left Hip Down-Up-Out/Right Side Thrust/Left Side Thrust

Remember that the Divine Unrest is almost available for the Holidays so don’t forget to contact Daniel at bellydancehusband@leyla-najma.com or me at leyla@leyla-najm.com for more information.  

Free Belly Dance Choreography Video

PS: You can find a free 25 minute choreography belly dance video and wake up your inner choreographer

The post When the Choreographer is Born appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

The Divine Unrest took 4 years of me trying to figure out a way to get my thoughts down in a way that would be an interesting read for dancers. I’m not sure what type of book the Divine Unrest is considering the fact that I did what most women do who have a million things to do; I piled together a hodge podge of articles and thoughts when I had the time.

So what would make me write my book…in the beginning some things in our dance community really bothered me. I’ll be honest here, the first draft was angry and I pointed fingers or I should say pointed words stating how I felt. It was after my last production and I was in a state of denial about my directorial debut experience plus I was physically exhausted from all the pessimism that came with the show. But as edits came and went and let me tell you, there were many plus I shortened it, added to it and changed it to what it is today in essence, my version of dance, and philosophy on life. In the end, I’m glad I got over my issues and became my ole self again.

So as I typed and re-typed it became clearer to me that what I really wanted to do is share my life as a belly dancer meaning some of my unfortunate stories and experiences along with the highlights of my dance career. I think the best way to become apart of my community is to bare my soul in a way allows you to see me without agendas but also to become the solution to what I feel are problems. I didn’t want to be a drama queen and wallow in my self pity, that was the start of this book but as time passed that impractical and useless view point changed into what I hope is a valuable insight. I pretty much write like I do in this blog so those of you who read and follow along (which I appreciate more than you know) will understand my thought process. Some stories you will be familiar with because I wrote about them here and others will be new.

Also the book has been apart of the reason of the two week absences that occurred more often than not on my blog. So now I can focus on dance and speaking of dance, I’ll give you a heads up on next week’s blog, I will share more choreography combos and such and I will write more about dance and stage performing. Daniel was telling me today that I talk about everything under the sun and that it would be nice if I went back to my dancing advice and technique tips. So that will be on the next blog.

The title of the book is called The Divine Unrest, My Stories. Advice and Personal Views on Belly Dance . We are hoping to have it out within the next week or so. It will be self published and available on Amazon Kindle and other various outlets. I’m hoping to be able to make a hard copy of the book down the line but for now, we want to get it out for the Holidays. If you have any questions feel free to contact us at either Leyla@leyla-najma.com or bellydancehusband@leyla-najma.com

Thanks for all your support and I must say thank you all for reminding me that our dance community is full of the most amazing women on the planet. You all brought back my sense of humanity, my sense of self so thank you for the spiritual support that I feel has lifted me up and brought me back into dancing!

The post Halleluiah! My book, The Divine Unrest is finally done! appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

When friends become competitors, all bets are off when it comes to the outcome of an invested relationship. As a soloist, my career has been a solitary journey that has been for the most part conducive to the success of my choices and vision. But goals change like night and day and one direction can become the opposite end of what you thought you wanted especially when joint projects are brought into the picture. Friendships make choices easier and projects more accessible, less threatening besides the fun aspect of creating with another person. But what happens when you have equally talented choreographers and dancers working together calling the shots? What happens when compliments are given to one and not the other? How do individual egos keep themselves in check when the attention is not on them but their partner? Is highschool really over?

It isn’t always a problem and obviously there are many friendships that last years while working together. Look at dance competitions, Haflas, and workshops besides huge festivals. These come to fruition because the creative dreams and aspirations become the focus and intention for an end result called success. Any time people put their creative minds together, there is no doubt a future show in the works but I wonder in the reality of the entertainment business if there isn’t a price to pay down the road? If any one of us could be a fly on the wall…what really goes on when the doors are closed and true feelings of how the days events went, flowed freely in words unimpeded by protocol. Once we take our shoes off, the truth comes out and fills the room with unspoken feelings that were on the tip of the tongue yet kept in check. It’s human nature to question the day and as an entertainer even more so to question the creative direction a project is going.

Since I have been more of a writer these day than performer, I have found a peace of mind that in many ways is very comforting and unsettling at the same time. I keep peaking around the corner wondering when the SHF and nothing happens. The chaos of a production was the norm every couple of years and the feeling of free falling without a parachute was a daily occurrence. I would wake up thinking why was I tormenting myself and the answer was simple, because I am a dancer.

I just wrote an article for Jareeda on student relationships with their husbands, partners and boyfriends and I think in the context of this blog post the question is how much of relationship do we have with our students? Do we become teacher only or can there be some underlying gesture of friendship? Sometimes when we become the councilor of our students, our advice can come around and bite us in the butt. I learned that the more advice I gave, the less relationship I had with my students as a teacher. I had a couple students who were naturals in class and as their teacher; I encouraged them and gave them as many opportunities to perform as possible. In turn they slowly became my competitors and vocally wanted to have the same dance gig at the restaurant I was working at here in ABQ called Pars Cuisine. Ambition can cloud the mind of anyone especially when they hear the applause of an appreciative crowd. Experience is queen in this business but sometimes life will put into question the position of teacher versus student.

A good example of a dance competitors undoing happened at an event that I was hired for. It was a huge Persian concert years ago in Dallas and I brought in a dance friend of mine because even to this day, I believe in equal opportunities. In the end I ended up on the losing side of a joint effort because of my friends undermining agenda. In this instance unbeknownst to me, my dance friend was calling the event coordinator and constantly complaining to her that I was being manipulative and controlling. Since I was the contact person and I brought her in, I would relay conversations and info to her and we would get together and prepare for our show that we were doing jointly. She always left happy and never led on or said a word that there was a problem. The one thing I should never have done was give her the event coordinators number. I realized that in the entertainment business your friends can become your undoing and in this case there was no redeeming myself because as soon as I walked through the hotel doors, I was yelled at. The event coordinator wouldn’t listen to reason and my dance friend stood in silence watching her actions take their course.

I looked at my dance friend confused at first but with the look she gave me, I knew she said something to the coordinator but the worse part for me was the fact she never admitted she said anything and never apologized. I have always preferred to work solo when I get hired out because there are no surprises that feel like the rugs being pulled out from under you. When it’s a friend pulling the rug out from under you, it can undermine your view of humanity.

Isn’t it funny when everyone is getting ready in the back dressing room, they like to see where they are placed in the line up. I remember being in the dressing room getting ready when a dance acquaintance said, “I wonder why they have you ending the first half?” I looked at her kind of funny and asked her what she meant. She just said never mind and walked away. It was a beat around the bush slight with a pleasant smile covering it up. Maybe someone would call that passive-aggressive. There seems to be plenty of experts regarding this characteristic but at the time I hadn’t heard of it. Local shows can cause dance friends to get a little freaky when it comes to the line up. It’s as if it’s making a statement, telling everyone where you are in the line of the community. That’s why I prefer my good buddy Selena Kareena’s method of dealing with this dilemma. She puts all the names in a hat, mixes them up and pulls out names one at a time. The line up depends on the luck of when your name was pulled out of the hat. She has a special dinner show just for her workshop teachers and another evening show for invited performers and attending workshop participants. So she understands the privileged position workshop teachers have but she also knows the baloney that can come with the line up and how it can get a bit crazy.

Do we compare our careers according to how good or bad our friend’s career is doing? Maybe we hide it when we think no ones looking but again I think we look around us to see where we are on the ladder of success. I like the quote from Mikhail Baryshnikov when he says, “I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself.” If I see myself as my competition than it makes sense that I will always strive to overcome my shortcomings and allow everyone else to do the same.

Maybe this is a saying we need to teach in class and it’s one that we need to remember. This way we can take care of our friends the way we would want to be taken care of and there wouldn’t be any need to undercut or undermine someone who is part of our community.

 “As a solo performer sometimes we have to bloom and become one with our community besides being the individual flower.” Leyla Najma

Share your thoughts on this one…what do YOU think?

News:

Morwenna Assaf’s interview is up on www.bellydancevillage.com and I have to say you will be entertained, educated and surprised at all the topics we covered. Morwenna has an insight of a true master so anyone who is a fan, enthusiast or dedicated dancer must go check out her interview!! You can find Morwenna at these two websites or on facebook.   http://ArabiDanseAcademie.webs.com or www.CreateOpenBorderscom.com

Remember to  visit Chris Hlbert’s website http://www.talkingpuffins.com and support Jareeda www.jareeda.com

The post When Friendships become Competitive appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Focusing on the dance of yourself, is a life time goal that we all share in especially when we strive to turn our dreams into reality. It’s not about comparing creative ability or competing because you think you lack in something, it’s about focusing on the dance of yourself in a way that lights your path. Think of headlights that always seem to shine a little further ahead than you can actually see.

I don’t mean this in a way that you hear from those self help gurus, not that there is anything wrong with them but I must admit that sometimes I don’t understand how being the best I can be means I have to take a 6 week course and dish out a lot of dough. I have talked to a few people, one in particular who wanted to help me make more money with my business. She asked me what I make a month and I didn’t want to tell her because it was one of those free sessions and I felt it was a very personal question, upfront. So I hemmed and I hawed a bit which made me look like I didn’t know squat about the business. She asked me why I didn’t know how much we made and I told her that I wasn’t comfortable answering her question. She then said I was trying to hinder her from helping me when “bingo” my lightbulb went off. I realized at that moment that all I was to her was another checkmark for her resume. How do you tell someone that what they are recommending doesn’t fit your specific product, which in this case happens to be me? She said I didn’t see the full picture and I told her in so many words that she had no clue what the full picture was concerning what I did. I was dance instruction and she was product management so while it looked like I could get something out of our free session, it ended up being a bust.

It’s not just the economy, and let me add here that I know when I even mention this word some of you cringe, it’s more the nature of the beast or in our case the entertainment business. But even though we want to keep the mundane world out of our dance experience the two are blending and mixing their way into a blurry way of life. It all trickles down to one thing, what you want out of your dancing and what price you are willing to pay to get there. Yes, to walk the path of a dancer, there is always a price to pay and sometimes the price is a wager that instinctively we wouldn’t pay in everyday life but in dance, the gambler in us comes out and we bet and pay for our invented peace of mind.

How is it that in order to be the best that you can be, you have to prove that you can actually do what you say you can do? This isn’t a quiz but more a question that borders on the game of scrabble. How we put together our choreographies and express them on stage is another version of building words upon words. In this instance it’s wordless motion that creates a inquisitive appearance that is formed by defined choreographies. A great show is one that is superimposed with individual creativity that constantly builds a network of inspiration. It keeps the audience wanting more besides feeding our need to entertain; it services both sides of the human coin. Sometimes the constant desire for more or the need for gratification can develop a habit of focusing only on the self. This is where we have to take a look at who we are even if that means doing a housecleaning of gigantic proportions. Looking under the rug can be a shock even if we know what’s under there but in the end it’s good to know that there’s nothing to hide. And to be honest here, the few times I did a house cleaning, I actually took back a few things I threw under the rug. It was almost like I saw things with a new set of eyes, appreciating forgotten ideas or things that at one point seemed to come back and try to haunt me. Now what once haunted me,  comforts me and what seemed like an unwanted experience became a welcome lesson.

Looking at oneself can be hard especially when looking back at “you” is the end result of concepts, ideas, beliefs that attach themselves with no regard to preferred esthetics. Who wants a zit of insecurity on the tip of their nose or dark circles that tattle on us, telling those within eye range we sleep like crap or we aren’t as healthy as we say we are. Fear can be the grey hairs of worry but with a good dye job, no one knows the difference except our pocket book or the stained towels on the floor. Buying into the dance persona can become a opiate routine, making the gentlest of souls immune to the daily joys of life, because for most entertainers, they want the exhilaration of significant fun beyond that of the normal masses. Maybe I seem to be exaggerating here but I have seen some of my friends in this business, after the bells and whistles became silent, become consumed with the need to be needed. Eventually dance became the band aide that soothed only the monetary pains of life, never healing the deep wounds of dysfunction. After all, who isn’t dysfunctional today anyways? Should I speak for myself here?

There are a few movies that never get old and I watch them because of what the women portrayed in them stand for; Dangerous Beauty, Chocolat, and Like Water for Chocolate. Dangerous Beauty has the amazing undertone of the feminine image stating what it is and making no excuses for what it has become. In other words, a courtesan embraced her role in society and because of the paternal dictates of her day; there was always the danger of becoming inconsequential and forgotten. It didn’t stop her from being true to her feminine self even if this truth cost her, her life. Chocolat is about old traditions that dictate how to be acceptable and apart of a community based on paternal and religious dictates that are oppressive. Becoming inconsequential has it’s appeal only if a person is existing and not living. It only takes one unique view to come into the mix that gets people thinking, and in the end new ideas can co-exist with old ones. Like Water for Chocolate teaches about the restraints of old tradition that have no conscious, compassion or emotional connection to the ebb and flow of life in the moment. It’s as if life stands still and people walk in and out of day to day living like a residual existence. Eventually we have to stand up for ourselves even if we feel no one is listening.

So why are these movies among my favorites…for what they remind me of. I don’t want to apologize for being born a woman and I don’t want paternal dictates thrown my direction without my permission. I like the view from my experiences and because I have walked my path for awhile, I don’t feel the need to ask who I am anymore. If I am who I am than this means that I take my beliefs and views everywhere with me. I don’t want to have to silence my convictions because of  authoritarian oppression. Traditions are apart of all communities but sometimes they can get in the way of modern progress which enables everyone to partake in life’s opportunities. Malala, the little girl who spoke up against the Taliban is a great example of this, she stood up for her right to an education and for all of us, she should be the shining light of courage and fortitude.

Accepting the good, the bad and the ugly means that we all take responsibility for our lives allowing for a little abandonment to come in along with the accountability. I admire women who are the end results of their lives, laughing, smiling and encouraging women around them to live their lives to the fullest. We have to follow history and we need to keep alive in us what makes us uniquely us. I love the passage from the book Conversations with Alice Roosevelt Longworth by Michael Teague, that stated:

Mrs. Longworth confides, and I can almost hear the glee in the telling, that she was indeed unruly as a child, that she knew that keeping a pet snake called Emily Spinach in the White House was bound to create talk, and that smoking in public as well as placing bets with a bookie was not the sort of demeanor expected of a turn-of the-century President’s daughter. Yet we know that if she had it to do over, she would be just the same.

Making a statement that is your trademark, whatever it is and wearing it like you do your favorite dress or outfit, shows how comfortable you are in your own company. The dancer in you performs the opus of your life on stage, not just in one choreography but through out your life as a performer. It’s all about looking back and saying, “I’d do it all over again,” and reveling in the fact that the feminine heroine that you represent is your testament to future generations.

My heroine is Malala the 15 year old girl who stood up to the Taliban,  surviving a bullet at close range to the head. May we never forget what she is doing for her generation and may we dance in her honor, remembering that through out history we have found ourselves through trials and tribulations. Sometimes if we are lucky we find our purpose for dancing so as I write this, Malala is mine. If she can stand up to oppression, I can stand along side her and dance in her honor.

Dance, when you’re broken open. Dance, if you’ve torn the bandage off. Dance in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance when you’re perfectly free. Rumi

News

The Divine Unrest is being edited right now meaning that I will get it back and make the final changes. I’m hoping it will be out by December. I’m crossing my fingers, and knocking on wood that it will finally be out. It’s a short book some of you might find interesting. Pretty much my ramblings like here.

Hey everyone…Morwenna Assaf’s interview is up on www.bellydancevillage.com and I have to say you will be entertained, educated and surprised at all the topics we covered. Morwenna has an insight of a true master so anyone who is a fan, enthusiast or dedicated dancer must go check out her interview!! You can find Morwenna at these two websites or on facebook.   http://ArabiDanseAcademie.webs.com or www.CreateOpenBorderscom.com

Remember to  visit Chris Hlbert’s website http://www.talkingpuffins.com and support Jareeda www.jareeda.com

The post Focus on the Dance of Yourself appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 “There can be nothing more infrequent than an occasional drink.” Oscar Wilde

I watched good friends drink after shows and with the drinks available to us for free at clubs, it’s easy to loosen up etiquette when the word “free” is involved.  I tried and enjoyed the tastes of a variety of drinks, dirty martinis, cosmopolitans, my all time favorite drink, margaritas and numerous other drinks through out the years. The drink called the vampire literally turned me into a vampire the next day. I would wake up, pale white, and look like all the blood had been drained from my face. The dark circles under my eyes made me look like a combination zombie/vampire and no amount of blush could give me color…it seemed to be sucked into my dehydrated skin. It never occurred to me that alcohol would become such an obstacle, one that I finally had to face. Hard liquor isn’t necessarily where my problem lies, to this day, I still crave wine.

When I went out on gigs and did workshop shows or community events,  drinking was never in the picture because I never put two and two together, even though the opportunities were there. Getting my costume on, working on my choreography, visiting with friends, well…it seemed like a different kind of environment that didn’t include alcohol. Put the word nightclub into the mix, along with the live music, dancing after hours and the two became apples and oranges. One included drinking, the other didn’t.

To speak of my indiscretions is a bit embarrassing, but then I really don’t hear much about belly dancers or dancers in general talking about drinking problems. I thought I would come clean at least in a way that let’s those who are hiding their problem know that they aren’t alone and the only ones dealing with this problem.

The funny thing is, I told myself I drank only on the weekends so 4 nights out of the week became, girl’s night out. That left 3 days to recoup which looking back seemed really absurd. If I was dancing at restaurants that served wine, there was always a glass waiting for me when I arrived and when I was done with each set. By the time I would go home, without even thinking about it, I would end up drinking up to 4 or 5 glasses of wine in a night. With my dancing and eating coming in intervals, no one could tell I drank that much. I had the perfect cover, hiding even from myself the progressing habit that eventually led me to a fateful decision that helped me regain a sense of myself.

The buzz can start to become a normal state of conversing with people, hiding the insecure or shy woman. I knew if I had a few drinks, the giggly and inviting part of myself would come out, almost as if on cue. In many ways looking back, I can see that my crutch was drinking, because there was so much at stake every time I performed. We can feel as if we are naked up on stage, surrendering to fickle crowds. Some weekends were successes and others a depressing reminder of the indifference and folly that entertaining can be. And it wasn’t so much the crowds that I’m talking about, many times they were my saving grace, it was working with dancers from all walks of life that at times, became a precarious at best.

The PMS dancer combined with everyday life, relationship problems and money issues can be a ticking time bomb. One instance that sticks in my mind has to do with a particular dancers self importance that went beyond the average Diva. At a club I danced at, I was in the back dressing room getting dressed for my show, when a dancer that I had never met before came into the dressing room, demanding I leave so she can get dressed. Considering there were 3 mirrors and a bathroom, I didn’t get her request or attitude. I told her that since she was new, she needed to know that we all shared the dressing room. In mid sentence, she stomped out of the room looking for the manager of the club. Right after that, another dancer came in that I worked with and I told her what had happened. I could tell she was  PMSing by her demeanor and with a crazed look on her face, she gave me one of those, “Oh hell  no,” looks. So the new dancer came back with the manager and before he could even utter a word, the two went at each other. By the end of the yelling match, the new gal was in tears and my dance friend was spitting out fire, ready to tear her head off. I tried to mediate as best I could, so I suggested we finish getting ready and I would let the new gal know when she could come up and get dressed. Needless to say, the new dancer left that night, never to return and the sense of relief we felt, was immediate. We had drinks after our shows and I toasted my dance friend telling her that her PMSing, saved the day.  This is one of those stories were we drank to ease cramps, crankiness, melancholy or just for the sake of a drink. Anything in life was a reason to drink, and PMSing was one of them.

Where do we draw the line? At certain points, not even religion will keep someone from that fateful drink. Good times, laughter, live music and attention that strokes the ego, all come into play with the unsuspecting dancer. I’ve always said, “Compliments are a dime a dozen,” and when you surround yourself with attentive patrons, it’s easy to get caught up in the moment, forgetting your true purpose.

Traveling an hour and a half, one direction and then back in the wee hours of the night sometimes was a bit like the twilight zone. I realized one night when I was coming home just how important having my wits about me came in handy. I was being followed by a truck and I knew he had been behind me for about 30 minutes but I was focused on getting home because it was so late. At certain points he seemed to be right up on my back bumper which would freak me out, so I changed lanes only to have him change lanes with me. I was grateful to come into the town of Fort Worth, thinking more cars, more people to help me out if need be. All of a sudden the truck passed me swerved in front of me, and actually ended up facing me in my lane. I  put on the brakes on and stopped about 30 feet from where the truck was. A tall scary looking guy came out of the truck and started to walk quickly to my car. I was about to step on the gas when another car zoomed in between the cowboy and my car and honked their horn at him. The scary man ran back into his truck and sped off. The guy who helped me out was an off duty cop and he told me, he saw what the driver was doing a couple lights back and followed behind to make sure nothing happened. I can only imagine if I would have had a drink too many, what would have happened on the highway coming into Fort Worth.

After that experience I sobered up and decided on a two drink limit the nights I was dancing. But let me make myself clear, it’s not like I drank myself silly and was a falling down drunk, as a matter of fact I was one of those drinkers that could hold my alcohol so well that it was to my detriment. I’m not the only one in my family who can do this.

The only time I didn’t drink, period end of story was when my daughter came to the restaurants and clubs with me. I know there are some people who think she had no place being at the clubs and restaurants but it all started with a very bad experience with a babysitter. The following evening  I had my daughter in tow along with blankets, pillows and stuffed animals. I had the support from the places I worked to the patrons I entertained.  I eventually found a good babysitter, I could trust but it took a long while. By the time Savanah was 3, she was a Shirley Temple connoisseur, loved by everyone at my work. She was my saving grace because not only did patrons understand I was a working mom, they never bought me glasses of wine when I had her with me.

In the end I realized that I had a drinking problem when I bought wine just for myself hidden in cuthberts in the kitchen from view. It wasn’t that I drank everyday, it was again those damn weekends, that proverbial habit that stayed with me no matter where I lived. One bottle of wine was always for me and everybody else had to share from what I had opened for them. It was a bit selfish I know, but an addiction always seems to include only one person. I finally threw in the towel and ended my drinking all together when I started to think two bottles were better than one. It was hard in  the beginning especially at work, because people would buy me a glass of wine and send it to my table. As word got out I was no longer drinking, I noticed that the people I hung out with who drank, no longer invited me to join them.

At certain points in this business alcohol plays a part whether it be New Year’s, anniversary parties, business parties or live music and dancing. It’s there and the temptation of  just one drink can turn into two and then three. I taught my students not to drink and dance but in some ways there was a part of me that felt like the hypocrite. But experience in this case proved to be the best teacher because if I hadn’t experienced what I did, I wouldn’t have been emphatic about them not drinking. The alcoholic is  always looking for herself in the mirror but the dancer sees herself. I would rather look in the mirror and like what I see.

Teach me to feel another’s woe, to hide the fault I see, that mercy I to others show, that mercy show to me.

Alexander Pope

Hey everyone…Morwenna Assaf’s interview is up on www.bellydancevillage.com and I have to say you will be entertained, educated and surprised at all the topics we covered. Morwenna has an insight of a true master so anyone who is a fan, enthusiast or dedicated dancer must go check out her interview!! You can find Morwenna at these two websites or on facebook.   http://ArabiDanseAcademie.webs.com or www.CreateOpenBorderscom.com

Remember to  visit Chris Hlbert’s website http://www.talkingpuffins.com and support Jareeda www.jareeda.com

The post The Drinking Belly Dancer appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

For awhile I have been thinking of how energy affects the base of belly dance and if female and male energy intertwine with each other to give our dance her longevity. Both are apart of nature, life and human existence but how much do they share in the dance world?

The female energy consists of virgin, lover, mother and sage archetypes that as I have found, create the vivaciousness and a mold for women through out their careers in dance. How do we integrate the male energy? Is it our husbands, lovers or partners that give us our sensuality on stage? Do we display our sensual and sexual selves based on how we relate to our relationships with our partners? Does a relationship have anything to do with dance? If anything, how we feel about our femaleness and our attractiveness states how we put together movement into our creative inspiration. If we look at the details of a dancer’s movements, we will see her relationships, inspiration, and family life emulated in her choreography. How can it be any different?

From The Song of Eve by Manuela Dunn Mascetti:

There is an old Sanskrit legend to the effect that, after making man, the Creator took the rotundity of the moon, the curves of the creeper, the lightness of the leaves, the weeping of the clouds, the cruelty of the tiger, the soft flow of the fire, the coldness of the snows and the chattering of the Jays, and made woman and presented her to man. After three days the man came and said to the Almighty, “This woman you have given me chatters constantly, never leaves me alone, requires much attention, takes all my time, cries about nothing and is always idle. I want you to take her back.” So the Almighty took her back. But pretty soon the man came back and said, “She used to dance and sing, and she looked at me out of the corner of her eye, and she loved to play; she clung to me when she was afraid, her laughter was like music and she was beautiful to look upon. Give her back to me.” So the Almighty gave her back to him again. But three days later he brought her back again and asked the Almighty to keep her. “No, “ said the Lord, “you will not live with her, and you cannot live without her. You have to get along the best you can.”    

Perhaps the above example explains the complexity between the eloquent dancer and the misunderstood woman. I have had better relationships with men as the dancer because the dancer carries the attributes that attract men’s interest more than the average woman. They tend to want to give back the day to day aspects of life instead of understanding that all the above make up the imagined heroine. Is the belly dancer only shown during performances, or does she come out to play at all hours of the day and night? Truly, it is obvious that the belly dancer is the absolute embodiment of woman, enhanced, visually brilliant and refined.

From my vantage point, I have realized that Daniel brought in the male perspective which doesn’t look so much to the creative aspect of the journey but more so the pragmatic details that make the journey profitable. The drama is secondary to the profit margin and in this way of thinking, it breaks down the trivial incidences of  life, making them inconsequential to making a living. Just as in the Sanskrit, the irritations of the feminine image can cause the masculine energies to wonder, seeking a reprieve from the ever present drama. Even within our own communities we seek our own reprieves, not so much because we don’t understand our issues but because, pulled together in a crowded room, even for us they can become too much.

Through out history, it has become apparent that we played a part in the desires and retributions of the male energy, creating a dichotomy, the beginning of  a feminine psychosis. Maybe this is apart of what audiences feel when they see us dancing on stage. The excitement of seeing the imaginative muse on stage, one that means something different to each viewer, quickly mixes the energies together, adding to each show. If the male energy wasn’t in the mix, I think our creative force would be two dimensional, because there has to be some type of unwavering tension, almost an exasperating, opposing nemesis to bring out our strength and convictions with such vigor. When the two intertwine in seduction, the two energies burst into pure creation, a timeless union that revitalizes the reservoirs of  inspiration. So it is obvious there is a dichotomy between the positive and negative reactions the two energies have with each other.

From The Song of Eve by Manuela Dunn Mascetti:

Moon symbology lingers on nowadays in any case in Catholic countries such as Italy, France, Spain and Portugal, where the Virgin Mary, the mother of mothers, is sometimes called the Moon of the Church, our moon the spiritual moon. A woman may count the length of pregnancy term as the passing of nine moons, for it is believed that after the ninth lunar cycle the baby will for sure be born.        

A huge part of the feminine energy is the birth of life, the ability to carry life and nurture life from our bodies. The seed once planted is taken into the miracle of life and the moon lineage is continued with each generation. We can’t become mothers without the seed of life, so I see that it is in our natures to become the seducers of men. The moon cycle eventually makes her voice known and we either answer her with child or with the self restraint of a childless seducer. In some ways men want both and within the dark mystery of the seductress, so does she.

The role of mother and companion is played out within our choreographies unless of course our path is that of the seductress with many companions and numerous stories detailing that of conquest or surrender. How many relationships contribute into a belly dance performance? It seems as if I am saying we have more partners than the average woman, which isn’t at all what I am getting at here, what I am saying is do we perform with our parents in mind, our children or more so than not, our lovers. The cycles of the moon implies that we instinctively understand our bodies, desires and emotional outbursts with a psychic perception that includes creative expression. This is where I go for inspiration and ideas because within my psychic awareness, I remember experiences that bring out the drama of life, those moments of pain and yet most definitely of elation. It’s evident that we hold onto moments that shape our feminine image, the symbology of our definitive selves called the modern woman.  But it’s in the archetype of the ancient stories of women, where we really understand that not much has changed for thousands of years, in regards to how men and women constantly strive to understand each other.

 From The Song of Eve by Manuela Dunn Mascetti:

Women have a birthright to procreate in the most beautiful way, breaking thus the curse that patriarchy set on them. For out of woman comes the future of mankind.

Women can carry the male energy within them thus making us archetypes for both male and female energy. It’s the fact we can birth both sexes that places us in a realm of the Goddess. How we dance on stage enhances the symbol of who we are and I think because of this, people without knowing it, sense they are getting a glimpse of the Goddess. Can I say belly dance is the dance of the Goddess, or is it really the dance of the female and male energies?

The funny thing is, when my Dad is in the audience I tend to want to cover up my feminine image to his respectable view of me or if my nephews come to watch me, I want to introduce them into the feminine image that is all encompassing. These are two opposite ends of the spectrum but it makes sense. Our fathers don’t want to see us as symbolize a seductress up on stage and family members don’t want to see the full spectrum of attributes we represent. People want to select what we represent so that they can watch without feeling they are experiencing something inappropriate. It all has to do with how they connect with the feminine image and if there is any blemish left unresolved or locked away. I even think because of this, we dance our family inhibitions and conservative ideals which is cultivated in us as children growing up. Our identity as the feminine self started with the first taboos of becoming a woman. We dance out these experiences from our memories and feelings of being inadequate, depressed or repressed. The female and male energies have to face up to outside delusions in order to become completely what they need to be.

Energy is the life source, God created for everything on this planet, so it seems natural to want to understand how to utilize our lineage in a way that allows us our individualism or in other words freedom to be our female or male selves. I am every thought, idea and taboo on stage because I am what the audience says I am. Because I am comfortable with who I am, I can allow definitions that are not my own, placed on my dance persona. I am female energy that encompasses so much that in the end, I am everything people think I am and nothing like what they say I am. The Goddess, the Moon Mother or the Seductress lives in a world of partial truths so that everyone’s truth can live and thrive. The male energy is the missing link to the feminine image because the two share a creative and spiritual relationship that completes each other. In the end, I have found both energies are on stage, choreographed and danced through movement, the divine source and connection, a unified bond.

The post Female and Male Energy in Belly Dance appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Since I’ve been hanging out and doing my own thing, I’ve realized that changes in belly dance have happened that to be honest, I’m not too crazy about. I like ATS but I don’t like the line laid across the sand between Cabaret and Tribal dancers. We support the same dance form, just in different ways. I heard through the grapevine that Tribal was considered the authentic representation of belly dance and I wondered where Cabaret fit into this mindset. I think belly dance history is getting muddy and if women don’t do their own research, they will find themselves caught in the middle of hearsay, because they won’t know what’s true or false.

I’m wondering if Tribal dancers are saying they are the modern day Ghawazee or Gypsies. In, “Serpent of the Nile,” Wendy Buonaventura writes:

When they settle, however, gypsies assimilated the local traditions and made them their own. They took native folk dance and music, amplified and polished them, and then went on to use them as a means of livelihood.  

It’s apparent that through out history, belly dance changed with the ideals and traditions of the usurping rulers of the day. But the gypsies took this dance through it all. They are the ones who kept it alive and in the forefront of obscurity. If you really think about it, they established the entertaining dancer, singer and musician. Today it can easily take a life time, learning what our heritage in belly dance is really about. So why is there a need, to decide what is original especially here in America? I’m being a bit sarcastic here, because I think that too much is put on titles and not enough effort put into finding out the truth. Wendy Buonaventura’s book is an excellent way for dancers to get started on educating themselves on their dance form.

http://www.buonaventura.com

Looking back at the big names in our dance business who have passed on, such as, Ibrahim Farrah, Bert Balladine, and Serena Wilson, I wonder what their thoughts would be on the changes and divide on what’s original or authentic to belly dance. I do know that there are dancers today struggling with seeing burlesque in the same headline with belly dance. As far as burlesque is concerned, I actually have always been fond of Gypsy Rose Lee, and I think she brought grace and humor into a once thought of as herky- jerky style of stripping. Granted with the female body, entertainment and money, there have been women who have done both, I even had a famous stripper come to my studio years ago, who first started out as a well known belly dancer in Las Vegas.  I appreciated her honesty because when I asked her how becoming a stripper affected her belly dance career, she flat out said it ended it. She was able to put her 3 kids through college stripping, so she had no regrets.

The contradiction of adding or fusing different styles of dance into an already established dance form, forever changes the institution and foundation roots, creating an amalgamation or in other words, a hybrid of itself. Is this really what dancers want to do? I guess in belly dance we can have our traditionalist or libertarian outlooks on our dance form but the question remains, is giving so much room for change a good thing? Perhaps the fusion styles such as Gothic and the alternative interpretations of belly dance are especially for me, a little hard to swallow because I am a traditionalist. Can they be their own dance forms without the belly dance name attached to them? I will admit that my interview with Khalida Serqet now up on BDV, really made me think about the fusion styles because the more I thought about it, I guess the more uncomfortable I became with them. So if you want to hear our discussion on this subject, go to my membership site and check it out.

On one occasion I was invited to go to an underground Gothic club. It was mixed with vampire impersonators, grunge dancers, pretty much it was like Mad Max came to my hometown. Yet to my surprise and for the most part delight, I saw two women belly dancing up on stage. They were actually very good dancers but in the middle of their performance, they stopped dancing, one of the dancers was tied up, while the other one started to flog her in front of the crowd. I know my mouth dropped open and my eyes almost popped out of my head because I was so shocked at what I saw. And what made it even more bizarre was the fact that the dancer being flogged was enjoying it, even though her back was swollen with red marks. I didn’t see the connection between belly dance and flogging and what really bothered me was the fact that the people watching their performance, without being educated on the facts, will always think that is apart of belly dancing.  That was the first time I realized that our dance form is being taken way out of it original and traditional context. It can’t fit into someone’s interpretation of what they want it to be without respecting it’s original history because this dance belongs to cultures that are thousands of years old. I always say that I am an American belly dancer and I perform my interpretation of what belly dance means to me but I respect the guidelines of what my former teachers taught me. I understand I represent them, various cultures and a multitude of belly dancers when I perform.

Its obvious how dancers dress, says so much about what style they are. I have always loved the assuit dress and saw some that were very old in at the Cairo market. Zohair Zaki wore her famous blue one that I love to this day. And Suhaila Salimpour did one of the most incredible dances I have ever seen in her black assuit dress when she was a teenager. So these two dance stars, for all intense and purposes are, cabaret dancers. Yet here in America,  Suhaila’s mom created the tribal look many years ago on the west coast. To find out what tribal was doing on the east coast another good resource is Morocco. If you want to know the indepth details of belly dance, she is a walking encyclopedia. http://www.casbahdance.org

In the early days, the two styles were never an issue. Most dancers performing in nightclubs wore the cabaret costume which resumed it’s precedence as the official club costume. Today there is so much added to the tribal costume including colorful tattoos, boots, spikes and netted hose, that I feel it’s taken on a life of its own. But does the look hold water to the statement that I heard about tribal being the authentic representation of belly dance?

But my quest here isn’t to say interpretation is a bad thing or that alternative inspiration can’t be brought into the creative process. What I am saying is read up on your history before believing everything you hear through the grapevine. In 1926 Badia Masabni opened up the first night club for women in Cairo and before that around the mid 1800’s the Gypsies started to develop what we call today, belly dance. And believe me, there are so many men and women of importance regarding music compositions and choreography that paved the way for what we have and hold dear to our hearts. All I’m saying is that sometimes when you leave something the way you found it, when you come back to it you’ll discover there’s so much that you missed the first time around.

 News

Chris Hilbert’s interview is now up on www.bellydancevillage.com so be prepared for a fun and informative interview. I had a ball talking with Chris aka khalida Serqet and I learned quite a few things from her that I didn’t know. Daniel finished off the interview with a wonderful gallery of photos from Chris’ dance years which spans most of her life, since she was in the 10th grade!  Chris has a great website that takes care of all your photo restoration needs,  http://www.talkingpuffins.com/

The post Changes in Belly Dance appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

For the past two weeks I’ve been dealing with my daughter’s registration, college books, campuses (there’s four) and teaching her to drive to each location. She’s a newbie at driving so it’s been an interesting, white knuckles exciting week with a few moments of melt downs in between (not mine, just to be clear). But having survived all of the above I can’t say much for my sanity. If anyone thinks an 18 year old is ready to leave the nest, in this day and age, their nuts!

With my minimal moments of sanity, I thought about what I would opine about so in the end I felt compelled to write about  mixing the pot of life, combining a multitude of thoughts and insights and piling them all together. The pot consists of, all hypothetical to real experiences from friendships, productions, studio drama and performing venues. Let’s be real, 50% of what happens to us, first starts in our imaginations and eventually comes to life in the real world. But as we all know, reality has a way of throwing in unexpected pot holes or dead ends. From these experiences we learn or do we?

Sometimes when I look back at my dance career, I wonder how well I did or if I missed the boat. I didn’t make the friends that I thought I would make and I did my share of pissing people off. I will say, a majority of this was unintentional but there was a small margin of intentional that I at least admit to. Sometimes in this business two mindsets collide and how principles and values are presented sets the stage for a winning  team or at least  an interesting game of theater and drama. I saw early on that study was the road to enlightenment especially in our dance field. But I have come to realize that the study part is mixed in with living life, feeling life and learning about life. Perhaps this is why belly dancers stay in their field of choice because there is so much of the themselves invested in combining their personal and professional lives. In the end, I have come to realize that the study part isn’t just about workshops, practice and curriculums but understanding how to juggle placing everything into it’s compartment of importance and having the ability to provide needed attention at a moments notice. Perhaps part of the attraction to belly dance for most women, is an unconscious  desire to put to test their ability to multitask. There have been moments where I flunked my subconscious test and went completely bonkers trying to fit it all together.

The pot of life requires only that it’s filled daily and what it’s contents are is up to the individual pot stirrer. I stirred in an interesting spice years ago that didn’t taste very good in the end. It was a concoction that just didn’t work because I didn’t know what ingredients were needed. Working with dancers and people in any circumstance can involve unexpected outcomes. The truth at the table stated from a friendly face can have double meaning when a person’s back is turned. Truth just like beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Our dance field is constantly churning the tides so that every time I look  into her  essence, it’s always a different experience. Since women are nurturers by nature and nesters by trade, it seems fitting that we become apart of her changing pace. It’s just, sometimes I don’t like the direction she goes in.

It’s the sensitivity to the creative process that makes the performer or artist more acute and aware of life and pain. Leyla Najma

Why is it in the end of each production, the soul goes into a depression that pulls the dancer into a slumbered state of incomprehensible doldrums? How can any idea become such a chaotic ordeal that it pushes the psyche of any dancer to the brink of madness? Creativity is the process by which we learn the details of our character so I wonder if madness is the hidden stitches, holding together our sanity or if it’s barely holding us together with safety pins. I remember the day when the last production I co-produced and directed, was about to open. I thought to myself, “By this time tomorrow it will all be over. Just think, all you have to do is get through today.” Over a years preparation took place to make it happen and there I was hoping it was the day after the show. Dealing with drama can become a rehearsal that never ends. Okay, let’s be real, dealing with certain people can be the unexpected pot hole of a great idea. Sometimes they create them everywhere  they go so walking, chewing gum and talking all at the same time can become hazardous to anyone’s health. To be blunt, specific people who think their worth is more than anyone else’s in a show can create this cacophony. Actually I read a  short article a little while ago about a group of dancers going through the same thing with one of their troupe members. The writer tried to be as “politically correct” as possible but the underlying sentiments spoke volumes because sometimes it’s what is inbetween the lines that sticks out like a red flag. Humane folly can take a successful show, troupe or career and ruin it within moments. The spiteful tongue, speaking words that can’t be put back in the tube of camaraderie can change friendships within the blink of an eye. Is it women who do this to a academy award performance or is it everyone?

Are dance friendships harder to have, nurture and keep than regular friendships? Is there an unspoken competitive rivalry that happens by nature, I mean we compete to a certain degree with our siblings as we grow up so why not our dance friends. I have felt the hint of unspoken dialogues with dance friends, almost to the point of psychically knowing what is said because we all understand the dynamics of struggling to keep the peace. What’s said, what’s not, is written in a persons body language every time dance friends meet. I remember meeting a dance friend for lunch who was  irritable with me, cutting off my sentences, ignoring questions and basically being a stinker. I asked her what’s up and she said she was just having personal problems. She fessed up with a lot of prodding on my part stating that I was the  problem because I was hired to perform for a private party that she was suppose to dance at. I called the hostess up and asked if  she would hire my dance friend since I was working with her a lot and she whole heartedly agreed. This wasn’t good enough for my dance friend because she wanted the dance gig to be her baby. Needless to say, she didn’t show up, I did and that changed the dynamics of our friendship. That one incident was pivotal in me understanding how fragile friendships are, especially when we sell our dancing ability to the masses. We can become a slave to our own image because selling what we do time and again, can affect our sanity, rationality and self confidence. If we measure ourselves according to someone else’s path, than we do an injustice to who we are because we have to find our own measuring stick for ourselves.

We are freer then the average woman because we are able to create our own works of art continually through out our dance lives. . Leyla Najma

The constant in all of this are the friendships that do sustain their longevity and create a strong bond that survives the tests of time. The real gems are the friends who understand you and let you grow with little or no conditions and judgments put on the friendship. Sometimes we have to grow away from each other in order to appreciate what the friendship is all about. Traveling, meeting the extremes of life head on, helped me realize that my goals were simple; to be easier to talk to, a better listener and a more compassionate friend. I think belly dance doesn’t just mold us but she some how brings together our puzzle pieces in a way that allows us to put the puzzle together in our own good time. As we see the emerging picture, we start to understand not only ourselves but the reasons things turn out the way they do, perhaps with a more philosophical outlook on life. But I have to also say, that my wild side came out more so with belly dance than at any other time in my life. I think most women can attest to the fact that, we embrace our hidden desires and we somehow make choices based on being passionate and in the moment, living dangerously, vicariously through our dance persona. When I lived in Egypt, I was never freer or more abandon with rules and doctrines. I’m not talking about doing anything illegal, it was all about opening up to my desires and playing out the parts of my dreams and fantasies. I came back a different person because I found many puzzle pieces that I didn’t even know existed. How could I put together an understanding of my life when I didn’t even know what was missing?

 I remember walking  the streets of Maadi or going to Luxor with Sakti, realizing that sometimes we just have to be spontaneous or we will never live life to it’s fullest. I was in a place that was my soul’s sanctuary, my companion of spirituality. The City of the Dead was one of those experiences where you know that you have witnessed something that is once in a life time. Queen Hatshepsut’s burial place was beyond anything I had ever seen. I remember the feeling of looking at the vast pillars and numerous steps and being in a place where a woman changed history by taking control of her fate thus becoming the symbol of the masculine, never losing her femininity. She was my martyr, my heroine from that moment on  because I felt a closeness and over whelming comfort in her courageous life.

Every woman who goes into the farthest reaches of her heart knows that magic is alive and by proxy, we are its ambassadors. Leyla Najma

After all is said and done, I have realized that, as we live life, we never stop being who we are, we just become better impersonators of ourselves. Eventually on stage, we not only dance authentically but we inherently become genuine entertainers; the end results of living our life path. There’s nothing more beautiful than watching a woman dance who embraces her individuality. In the end we put our families in the details of our movements. Love, passion, anger, laughter are the descriptive ways we bring to life, our lives. It’s always been about how we embrace our humanity, dance with humility and love passionately. Mixing the pot of life is much more than adding spice, it’s the ingredients of the soul mixed in with creativity. Combining all of life experiences, lessons learned and not learned creates the most the most beautiful design of all; the individual dancer.

News

Chris Hilbert’s interview is  coming up next so be on the look out for her interview on www.bellydancevillage within the next week. I’ll keep you all posted. I must say I had a blast talking with her, she made me laugh and she is so knowledgable about so many aspects of belly dance. I know you will all enjoy her.

I will be interviewing next the amazing Morwenna Assaf. As you can see, exciting women in belly dance are all over the place. I feel blessed these amazing women are in my life and in our communities.

Remember to check out the oldest belly dance magazine in existence www.jareeda.com and listen to Mezdulene’s interview on BDV. It’s not to be missed!

The post Mixing the Pot of LIfe appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Many students have asked me to tell them stories about private parties and gigs that I have participated in through out the years. I do have stories, but I was thinking that it might be a good idea to share tips for dancers,  especially since some of the experiences I have had, were close calls. Sometimes it’s hard to know ahead of time, how something will work out. But all dancers want to get to that level of the working belly dancer. Parties and gigs are the next step to the belly dance rite of passage. Not only are private parties and gigs money makers, but they are the icing on the cake during holidays and special events that we otherwise wouldn’t be apart of.

Even in restaurants and nightclubs, I have seen restaurant and night club managers deal with unpredictable people. Alcohol is usually the culprit but sometimes it’s personalities, and issues brought into the establishment. When you walk into someone’s home, you are not only trusting your hostess or host but you have to assume they are respectable people. The best parties I ever danced for, were from local customers who were patrons from restaurants or night clubs I performed at. You can’t get a better reference than that and it’s always a good point to start from. If they know the manager or restaurant owner, than you can bet that you will be in good hands. And I’m going to state something here that might make some eye brows raise; my favorite groups to dance for are Arabs and Persians. They tend to have more respect for our dance form plus obviously, we don’t have to explain to an ignorant crowd what we represent. American parties are fun but I have had more problems with touchy, feely people or antagonistic spectators.

Years ago, I was hired by the R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company to dance for their summer extravaganza themed shows in Albuquerque. I’m not or never have been a smoker and I don’t advocate smoking, but the money was good and I was a single mom at the time. So I asked some local dancers to perform with me, for a gig that probably was a really bad idea. We went to a country and western dance hall to represent Camel cigarettes. There were fortune tellers and henna artists besides a bunch of us in belly dance costumes mixed in with cowboy hats, tight jeans and a very hostile audience. They were the angriest women and the men were die hard cowboys who had not tolerance for the culture we represented.  The timing to say the least, was the worst and we had to have body guards with us the entire time we were there. It was so bad that we couldn’t go to the bathroom alone; we had to pair up. We performed one show which was booed, with insults and threats being yelled at us so the representatives for R. J. Reynolds company  told us to get our things and leave immediately. It was the first time in my life, where my dance form and costume caused a negative reaction from a crowd that for many years, were apart of my life. I worked cattle for years, wore cowboy hats, and had great friends who were cowboys. To this day, I still remember the prejudice and realize how ignorance can play such a huge role in people’s attitudes.

Tip 1

Send information to any hostess or host who has never had a belly dancer at their parties so that they can educate their guests before you arrive.

Tip 2

Make sure that if you are hired for a gig or private party at a public location that you will have security. Know your contact people ahead of time and find out if you need to come dressed or if there is a dressing room at your disposal.

 One reason I don’t drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time. ~Lady Astor

Alcohol will be an issue that will be your nemesis because it will be included in many parties and gigs especially with Americans. With  Arab and Persian parties, alcohol  usually is never a problem, but the tendency to  dance through the wee hours of the morning can get the best of any dancer. I have literally arrived home and crawled into bed just before sunrise. I remember one instance,  I woke up at about 2:00 in the afternoon after a long night of dancing, and I felt something stuck to my back. When I got out of bed, I found twenty dollar bills stuck to me. I recommend all dancers experience this… at least once!

Even when I am hired for private parties at restaurants, I become weary when I learn that the parties are either for someone retiring or corporate end of the year get togethers. This is because I had one experience that was unfortunate and a bit dangerous for my well being. The lesson learned is one I share with all my students;  perceptions can be warped with alcohol. The corporate party I danced for, itself was harmless and the group of people seemed to genuinely  appreciative my first show of the evening. As the night wore on,  I went to the back dressing room to change costumes for my second show.  There was one man who by that point drank way too much and he was looking at my dancing as more of a striptease. I knew he would be trouble but I assumed his party would keep him in check. I came out and started performing my second show when all of a sudden, he started yelling obscenities at me and to my horror, he stumbled up on stage. He started rubbing himself against me while at the same time, trying to put his hand down my belt. I pushed him away from me but this only made him angry. He grabbed me and pulled me off the stage towards his table. Some of the people in the group started to yell at him, trying to talk sense into him while others were trying to pull him away from me. He had a good grip on my wrist and he wasn’t letting go of me. The owner came over to the table and with one hard shove, knocked him on his back which thankfully made him let go of my wrist. The drunk man was escorted out of the restaurant, right then and there. I had a bruised wrist and needless to say my show at that point was over.

Tip 3

Before you dance for any private parties or gigs, make sure you let people know, nobody comes up on stage with you, without your permission.

Tip 4

If you see people impaired by alcohol, make sure you talk to your hosts about the dangers. If you are dancing for a private party at a restaurant, then make sure if you see people drunk and belligerent, that you let the owner know they could cause you problems.

“If you don’t follow your instincts on things, than you pay the price for ignoring your own warning signs.” Leyla Najma

 

Sometimes we get confused with exotic dancers and if belly dancers call their shows exotic, this puts us right up there into the imaginations of a multitude of people who view suggestive dance forms as stripping. Now, let’s be realistic, our costumes and movements even when performed well can be misconstrued by just about anyone. Burlesque and stripping have been around for years and I have found with our society the way it is today, most people won’t even try to educate themselves on the differences. Belly dance is thrown in there somewhere in the middle. So when you get hired for private parties or gigs, make sure the people hiring you, know exactly what your show consists of and you make clear what YOU expect from them.

I had a lady call me years ago and our conversation to this day still  irritates the hell out of me. At first, we talked for a few minutes regarding if I was available for her husband’s birthday party and what my fee was. She than asked me if I kept my clothes on or if I took them off right away. There was a long silence on my end because I couldn’t believe she asked me this question. I then asked her, what kind of dancing did she think I did. She stated she knew I was a belly dancer. I then asked her why she would think I would take my costume off? She said quite frankly that she knew her husband liked strippers and she thought she would surprise him with one for his birthday. I told her that she needed to get educated on the difference between strippers and belly dancers. I also told her that for a professional dancer such as myself, that’s about the worst insult you could say to us. She became defensive and said she didn’t see any difference between the two. I must admit, I became exorcisty on her and told her she was about as dumb as they came and I hung up on her. She called me back,  insisting I needed to dance for her husband’s birthday party and I told her when she was willing to educate herself on belly dancing, to let me know and I would think about it.

There is nothing you can do about cultural stupidity but from that one experience I decided to change my pamphlets and business cards, stating that I am a dance coach and professional dancer and producer. This way the message gets across that I make a living, teaching dance. I had, available for private parties on my business cards and decided after they were gone, I would no longer state that on my cards. And let me tell you, this wasn’t an isolated incident that caused me to do this, this was the one that was the final straw. Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself and your dance.

Tip 5

Make it very clear to any potential customer that you are a professional dancer and that you represent a cultural heritage that goes back thousands of years. Perhaps a few questions in the beginning of a phone call can help you screen potential customers.

Tip 6

You can’t always educate, ignorant people but the one thing you can do, is if you feel you aren’t getting the respect you or your dance deserve,  you can always say NO.

 “Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.”  ― Euripides, Bacchae

Private parties and gigs can be so much fun and in the right circumstances very lucrative. Just remember that if you don’t use your own common sense, people will take advantage of you. Guidelines for what you expect from them is just as important as understanding what they want from you. The important thing here, is to stay safe, make some money and enjoy yourself.

Go to www.bellydancevillage for belly dance info, articles and instructional videos. Immerse yourself with delightful interviews from some of the most fascinating women in belly dance today.

Support Mezdulene, publisher of www.jareeda.com and let’s keep the oldest belly dance magazine going strong!!

The post Private Parties and Belly Dance Gigs appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Now that I am finally at the cusp of achieving and finalizing the last editing of my book,The Divine Unrest: My Stories, Advice and Personal Views on Belly Dance, I was thinking about the belly dance education I had over the years, and if it was the kind of learning process I expected.

Perhaps I ambled less on the general highway of dance and scuttled more on various hidden trails that lead me to conform my ideals in a way I never thought possible. I wonder if I am a traditionalist in my views with an underlying liberal attitude. Belly dance can take the naïve expectations of a beginner belly dancer and through time, change the unsullied mind with tainted experiences.

My goal here isn’t to spoil the belly dance experience for anyone, only to state that belly dance is a superb teacher and she will teach with an indifference to the outcome of the lesson. Since belly dance is life lived and learned, it is the best tutelage any student can have, even the hard knocks of life have invaluable lessons in them but that doesn’t make them any less painful.

As I have gone through this last edit, it doesn’t seem as volatile as I once thought it would be. I wanted to spill my guts for everyone to see and bring to the table my experiences, for what they were, perhaps raw but as real as I could remember. But as I have looked at them all, it is obvious that I had and still have wonderful experiences, that have outshone any of the negative memories. And even the negative memories had funny experiences to go along with all the insanity. Add in the spice of women in any art form or career choice and you have a recipe for a hot, spicy and sweet cuisine that lives up to it’s name. But sometimes with women, you get hot when you want sweet and sometimes you get spicy when you want something salty. I found that it just depends on who brings in the most embellishments along with them. Sometimes it’s important to make a recipe work with the ingredients that present themselves. I have often thought back to my cowboy days, when we would cook a cowboy goulash over the campfire. It consisted of whatever we had with us at the time and sometimes the end result was a pleasant surprise for the pallet and other times dissatisfying.

I have observed, that the one beautiful aspect about women, is they are born with an innate mystery that is as individual as the woman herself. Belly dance just brings this out, almost magnifying it to a blinding and glorious burst of brilliance. It’s not always accessible on command, so there is no telling when this mysterious brilliance will shine. But even though belly dance is able to coax this mysterious ambiance out of women, the end results can become intense and overwhelming.

“A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon.” Arnold Haultin

If life was smooth sailing all the time, there would be nothing to write about and as a woman, I have found that even within my own intensity, I tend to languish, to the point of losing myself in my own, self evaluation. It’s easy to blur what’s  insignificant with what really matters. In the beginning, the reason for writing my book, was to find out which aspects of my career path were within, which category. In the end, I ended up taking paragraphs out and even shortened chapters because as I wrote, I slowly started to heal myself. It was almost like writing my book about my belly dance experiences, helped me take a good look at what really mattered to me and to let things go, like water under a bridge. For awhile there, because I couldn’t see the forest for the trees, I felt disassociated from something that had been a burning passion for much of my life. Belly dance entered my life at the early age of six, so I wondered how it could be that I had come to such a barren place, where I didn’t or couldn’t bare to even talk about it…this is when I knew I had to stand up to the plate and not just re-evaluate belly dance but put it in a perspective that held water within my own understanding. My foundation hadn’t crumpled, but it had cracks in various places that over time, became big gaping holes. I didn’t stop to think that my lack of motivation and care, helped to create my foundations expanding weakness.Belly dance can be the double edged sword that inspires many fantasies and fictitious novels, one side is magical and the other, is the normalcy of  everyday life. This particular side can be like a death sentence for us as belly dancers, because within it’s walls we can feel imprisoned with obligations, creativity shackled with no way to create from our inspired thoughts or desires.

Belly dance is an all encompassing world of successes, failures, unwanted lessons and experiences of new heights of euphoria along with the downward spiral of despair. I really don’t think it can be any other way, otherwise women wouldn’t be so attracted to belly dance. It’s a way of living life not just to it’s fullest but gaining something that can allude us through out our lives, the chance to create from our individual artistry and to be accepted in a way that validates who we are.

So I thought I would share with all of you, one paragraph from my book because as I found out today, I have come a long way from where I started; the journey and return…back to myself.

Being in a state of awareness from an older and wiser vantage point, is the best part of being on my path now. Within our lives as dancers, we affect the connection we have with our dance form by accepting who we are as women and feeling comfortable with what we see in the mirror. This is where the duality of the two comes together and we dance from a place of freedom. It’s not about the audience or the applause; it’s about us coming in and placing ourselves where we belong, in the eternal circle of life. The, Divine Unrest sets in motion the first baby steps we take as dancers and it never leaves us until the fires of creativity burn out or the inspiration fades away to dust. I was born a dancer and I will die a dancer. As a Norman Cousins quote states quite well, “Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.”

Check out www.bellydancevillage for interviews, articles and of course instructional belly dance videos.

Photography by the awesome and wonderful Michael L. Miller mlmiller@9point.com

Ladies, please go to Mezdulene’s website www.jareeda.com and subscribe to her magazine. Let’s keep our belly dance history alive by making sure Jareeda Belly Dance magazine endures for generations to come. If you want to find out about Mezdulene’s annual dance camp or more information on  the Belly Dancer USA competition, go to her website and click on the links.

The post The Belly Dance Education appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

“Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, “She doesn’t have what it takes.” They will say, “Women don’t have what it takes.”

~Clare Boothe Luce

Freedom is a way of life that can be taken for granted by those who live within its limitless possibilities. Take away the right to be human, to be seen as human and heard as a human being, and you have an existence that squashes any hopes of change or the very idea of freedom. Doctrines can limit the achievement of those few steps taken to freedom by those who don’t have it. Rules, cultural etiquette and religious script can take away or give to the way of life, each person they affect.

Last week I heard about a new woman’s channel from Egypt that is gaining a lot of attention. The women are fully clothed from head to toe, dressed in their Burka’s, even wearing gloves to hide their hands. The eyes are barely visible which for a western woman such as myself, was uncomfortable to watch. I instinctively felt they were hiding away their individual representations of what the feminine image is for them. Yet they claimed it is a success, because there is a desire and need for a show just for women within their society for their feminine culture. Are they achieving their independence and freedom by hiding their feminine image? Was it a day to shout out a zaghareet?

It seemed like a twisted contradiction that made me actually watch the news trailer twice. Each time, I didn’t see a victory for freedom; I saw a few steps backward for women’s rights. But let me say this, I am speaking from an American view, and I understand how religious beliefs play a huge part in how a particular society views it’s own cultural esthetics. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I didn’t see a smiling face looking back at me, I saw fabric speaking back to me with the innuendo of a woman’s voice. I didn’t see the physical likeness of what I take for granted, women unadulterated within their own individual personalities, speaking with unrestrained poise. The eyes are windows to the soul, so with so much hidden, I couldn’t grasp what I was watching was freedom for the individual woman because I equate this to what I see every day in my world. To me, freedom is seeing women live life, deciding what their own dress style should be.

I am a canvas that changes every year that I am living, breathing and learning. My physical body tells the story of who I am and where I am going. I celebrate by wearing clothes and make-up that make me feel good about being a woman. I walk with a Goddess swing and the curves of my Picasso hour glass. My bosom shows how I nurtured my daughter as a baby. I have the wisdom of a woman who has lived life and yet, I still feel childlike with each day that unfolds before me. Do these women embrace any of this and if so how do they enjoy their ability to nurture and carry life. Are they even free to think this way?

They made me invisible, shrouded and non-being A shadow, no existence, made silent and unseeing Denied of freedom, confined to my cage Tell me how to handle my anger and my rage? — Zieba Shorish-Shamley, from “Look into my World” published on the 50^th anniversary of the United Nations Universal Declaration of Human Rights

Living in Egypt was a constant learning experience. My freedom which was a black and white definitive outcome of my upbringing, changed into an unrecognizable meaning that was pinned down into a confusing doctrine. Awhile back, I wrote about waiting in the wrong line at a government building for stamps. At the time, I didn’t know I was in the men’s line. I saw everything through my integrated eyes, people in a common place just like back home. I was standing for what seemed hours and my patience was wearing thin because of the heat. Once I was up, I approached the window requesting stamps. The man refused to sell me any, stating I was in the wrong line. He pointed to the women’s line which was really long. I yelled at him, reached for his shirt and told him he was going to sell me stamps. Could I blame the heat for my stupidity or was it my feminine rights that took to the cause of such an outrageous predicament. I don’t know, but I can tell you what I did, wasn’t a smart thing to do. Just before an irate man behind me was about to intervene on behalf of the government worker, two women came over, grabbed me and put me in the front of their line. With Soldiers approaching the line the women pushed me towards a taxi cab so I could get away without getting into trouble. I was grateful to the women but I must say, I was not ready for segregation, yet I was in a place where it was looking at me square in the eyes, with unmistakable consequences.

When we are together, everyone here is talking about how the Taliban has destroyed our lives. They won’t let us go to school because they want us to be illiterate like them.” — Nasima, 35-year-old Kabul resident

Misunderstandings can happen because of appearance and prejudices especially if a strict faith and ideals are a daily focus and mantra. I experienced this on a trip to Saqqara, the step pyramid. I was hit in the back of the legs with a long tube of some kind by an old woman who was angry because she thought I was Egyptian and dressed inappropriately. I was in a turtle neck sweater and loose fitting jeans with high top boots. I guess she felt I was too westernized. I turned around to punch whoever had just hit me, when Ahmed a dear friend, pushed me back into the van we had hired for the day. As I spoke expletives in English, the woman realized her mistake and started wailing. I couldn’t understand this especially since I was the one hit, with huge bruises on the back of my legs.

Even with a conservative dress code that I took to heart, problems arose. I had friends who went to Egypt and covered their hair and were even more conservative than me, wearing long dresses and shawls. I just couldn’t cover my hair in the summer heat plus I brought my cowboy hat which I thought would cover my hair appropriately. But this didn’t work because I ended up being chased by a huge mob wanting to know if I was in the TV series “Dallas.” I literally dove into a taxi cab and went on to some friend’s apartment. I gave away my cowboy hat that very night because I didn’t want to deal with another scenario like I had just experienced. I learned anything out of the ordinary could create a stir because religious views and protocols don’t always allow for options or change. I was complacent in my views and I had to realize that women were viewed in a certain way and even though I couldn’t understand how to conform to this, I realized that I already represented a different lifestyle and culture by how I expressed myself.

Cathy Young from the Boston Globe Writes:

“Meanwhile, using the language of tolerance to justify oppressive practices is a grotesque perversion of liberalism. The veiling debate is a case in point. No amount of rhetorical sleight of hand can disguise the fact that the full-face veil makes women, literally, faceless. Some Muslim women in the West may choose this garb (which is not mandated in the Koran), but their explanations often reveal an internalized misogynistic view of women as creatures whose very existence is a sexual provocation to men. What’s more, their choice helps legitimize a custom that is imposed on millions of women around the world who have no choice.”

If the Koran does not mandate this, then how can the progress for women’s rights be represented by women covered? If any woman is covered, how can she express to humanity her expressive right to be a woman? When I saw men walking around in their galabeyah’s comfortable and relaxed on the news trailer, I just became irritated. There are Egyptian women who don’t cover themselves in Egypt, so I wondered where they were and why they weren’t the friendly faces of this new program. Could I even suggest that there might be something subliminal happening here? I wonder what the message is.

I respect a person’s right to choose whether it be religious, cultural or ethical beliefs but when it eliminates the physical self into a masked, imageless representation of a gender, it affects humanity as a whole.

Al-Hazzaa, in his doctoral dissertation, describes the situation of women in his native Saudi Arabia, as follows:

“While the discovery of oil generated large-scale wage employment opportunities for Saudi men in towns and cities, it lead to massive unemployment for women who became totally economically dependent on men, and their role for the first time, was reduced to full-time housewives. The wealth generated from the oil boom in 1970’s made it economically feasible to perpetuate the old customs of veiling and seclusion of women in Saudi society. Today, the segregation of women is completely institutionalized and begins in the early childhood stages. Now, women live most of their lives entirely with women. Separate entrances and reception rooms for males and females in homes, different facilities in schools, zoos, restaurants and public parks only perpetuates the belief and practices of the separation of sexes in virtually all aspects of life.”

Saddeka Arebi, a Saudi Arabian woman professor of anthropology, who teaches in the United States, has written an important book about the women of her country. In Women and Words in Saudi Arabia: The Politics of literary discourse. She stated:

“There are three reasons why Muslim women may generally find it difficult to adopt a western model of feminism predicated on premises deemed universally applicable. Firstly, Muslim women do not perceive `family ties and kinship ties [as] a hindrance to women’s liberation’; secondly, there is a resentment of `the West’s identification of “the problem” of Muslim women as a religious problem’; and thirdly, wages have not necessarily functioned as a `liberating force’ in the sense advocated by western feminists.

Since views of finances differ with Saddeka Arebi and Al-Hazzaa in the role they play with Arab society, I wonder what if any is the consequence of keeping women at home. They can’t play an important role inspiring and leading young women into the future, at least not like western society so perhaps this new channel for women in Egypt is a start.

I guess I am a western feminist and I feel for any woman who isolates herself within a society that dictates to her a specific dress code. Yes, it is a cultural conundrum for someone like me but the bottom line is, if a woman has to cover herself because of religious dictates by men or because of indiscretions by men, what does that say about their logic?

“Women are not given the right to instigate divorce because they are prone to emotional and irrational decision making. A husband, however, can divorce his wife at any time he so wishes.” Ayatollah Ali Moghtadai

With quotes like the one above, I wonder how long it will take before our Arab sisters can find solace in the fact that they are not only equal to men but their natural counterparts. Obviously it’s not a one way street. Men have to step up to the plate honoring and acknowledging the important role women play in society. It’s a tough one; because anyone can make anything, even religion mean whatever they want it to. And when you have an illiterate society, there is no way for them to know the difference. It has to come down to those who do know, to take a stand for those in need of help who don’t know their rights. Talk about your feelings on this matter and keep it alive so that no one forgets we have sisters in the world who don’t know freedom, with no rights, kept hostage within their own gender.

News:

Mezdulene’s interview is up on BDV! It went up yesterday! So everyone please check it out because Mezdulene was a blast to interview. She has done so much in her life and for those of you researching dancers who have made a difference in our community, she is definitely up there with the best. Remember to go to www.jareeda.com to subscribe to the longest running belly dance magazine to date. Let’s keep Jareeda and Mezdulene going for a long time…what a treasure they both are. 

Chris Hilbert’s interview will be next to edit…that is going to be a fun interivew so we will keep you posted when that one will be ready. We are a little back logged so thank you for your patience everybody! 

I will be working on the Friday Training from Home video for www.bellydancevillage.com at the end of this week. After that the next video will be combinations for troupes so I’m excited about that one!

New voices for Women in The Middle East by Ragai N. Makar University of Utah.

The post The Idea of Freedom appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

The woman tick is my terminology that came about within time based on dealing with emotional reactions from our gender. I’m not saying that men don’t do this, but I have found that women more times then not, can be more emotional than men. I have also found this tick can be anyone’s Achilles heel, because this particular problem can be adverse to gaining the advantage in business or even in side hobbies. It’s a given that with time, comes experience but sometimes being the expert can get in the way of learning and growing. As we say in our dance field, we are all eternal students but we can’t just say this without really believing it.

The woman tick is an emotional roller coaster of self absorbed ideals that are a very human aspect of aging. But in our field it can be a double edged sword, hindering us from seeing a helping hand or good advice. Just recently, Daniel noticed a well known dancer using ad words in a way that he thought might be costing her more money than she needed to spend. He called her up, wanting to be helpful and give her some advice on ad words, but she didn’t let him talk, told him she didn’t want to be sold anything and hung up on him. He called her back and told her he wasn’t trying to sell her anything, he just wanted to pass on his experience with ad words and help her save some money. She screamed and yelled at him and needless to say that phone call wasn’t any better then the first. Here’s a gal, who has been on the cover of Dance magazine who is well known in our dance field, yet showed the prime example of the woman tick.

It really bothered me, because I know Daniel had the best intentions for this gal and he was just trying to help but I told him when it comes to established  dancers, it’s best to wait for them to ask for help. But Daniels comes from the Corporate world, where information is important and vital to keeping up with what’s happening in the world. He just shook his head, and said he couldn’t believe that if she is as well known as I said she was, why she would behave like that.

It’s easy to get caught up in our own little world but in this business or any other, that can be costly. Even if a person dances for fun or is doing it as a hobby, there comes a time when expenses comes into the picture and they have to take stock of what they are doing. I still do this and find it amazing what really goes into making a business work, how it can change a person’s viewpoint from  entertainer into business woman. I would have to say, today I see my dance career from more of a business woman’s perspective.  I can’t understand the self absorbed mindset of… my way or the highway. To be honest, I have known it well and it served me only one purpose, obstruction of any progress I wanted to make. In other words, how can any of us make progress with blinders on. We can’t see the full picture at all times, which is why information is so vital in making sound decisions.

One thing that dance has done, is made me more aware of my idiosyncrasies. If anything, dance can be a magnifying glass that emblazons any one peculiarity for the world to see. But when a professional, no matter what profession, becomes their own expert, than the question needs to be asked, where do they go from there? It can get lonely at the top.

      “If you do not like it, ignore it; or offer your own version in return.” Salman Rushdie

In our dance world there might be some, who create their own versions of  dance propriety. It’s understandable because viewpoints are developed either hands on or researched. Women are nesters and this is also brought into decisions made with careers or hobbies. Sometimes creating an organized home and  hearth, can become an obstacle regarding preferred desires and wants. I have literally watched two women get into an argument over how a show should be managed and organized. It eventually went beyond an argument, to outright animosity, because neither wanted to yield to the other. Both were well known dancers with earned status, but at that point it became obvious that they both felt they were experts, perhaps beyond a bit more than the other. The expert dilemma added with the woman tick can become a bloated fish syndrome that keeps creativity and ideas on the backburner of obscurity.

Turning on a dime, is a quote that has multiple meanings in our dance form. We can do a pivot turn on a dime, change our minds just as quickly or turn on each other with a the speed of a viper. Entertainment deals with vanity, and as a matter of fact it actually requires a tad bit to show through at times. With this requirement, it is only fitting, almost obvious, why at certain points we develop agendas and issues. As individuals, working on specific dreams and aspirations, the course of action is based on what the end goal is. But even with individual goals, I think at a certain point, we can all  become experts in our lives, allowing for other experts to come into discussions on business, life, love and womanhood. There is a saying that water seeks it’s own level, so it would seem, we would want to naturally surround ourselves with other entrepreneurs just like ourselves.

 “Every act of conscious learning requires the willingness to suffer an injury to one’s self-esteem. That is why young children, before they are aware of their own self-importance, learn so easily.”Thomas Szasz 

I don’t want to always blame the media, culture, society and so on…for our woes as women but can it be that even in a dance form that embraces the female image, also aggravates existing issues whether they be cultural, community or media based. It’s a thought that crosses my mind occasionally because through out my dance career, I have come across the woman tick in, some form or fashion. Sometimes it’s low key and barely noticeable and other times it full blown and obvious. What is interesting, is the emotional imprint each experience has left on me, changing my opinion of the sisterhood of this dance. Women seem to hold out, the smallest reserved prejudice just incase their preconceived insecurities pop up. Most of the time issues aren’t about anybody else, it’s the battle that plays out continually within themselves. But in saying this, it’s interesting watching these battles fought within the confines of dressing rooms, stages and rehearsals. The outcome is abrupt with silent gestures of an unspoken dialogue that has significant meaning with confusing elements that can be hard to grasp. Inner dialects can have thousands upon thousands of  meanings only known to the individual herself.

 “The inner dialogue occasionally wants to yell out to the world, I am me, I am okay. The funny thing is, we are yelling this to ourselves, instead.”  Leyla Najma

The woman tick can become daunting and tiresome. It’s not just a stigma to our gender, it’s a tale that is spoken out of context. Maybe it’s time we just saw ourselves as women, definable by our joy, laughter and tears. It’s okay to be melodramatic and laugh the next minute. Emotions are the one aspect  of our feminine image that allows us to honestly state our truth. But we have to remember, that truth can hide away when our blinders are on. If we focus too intently on our path, never stopping to look around, we can become the end product of our inhibitions. With the instance Daniel experienced, this gal had no idea what she missed out on because her blinders of self importance got in her way.

In the end it’s all about going to bed and knowing that no matter what, tomorrow is a new day and when we wake the next morning, we wake up as better people. But I wonder some times that if the woman tick is a genetic detractor, how can any of us can overcome what is innately apart of our nature. Only time will tell.

Belly Dance Village Interview News

I am finishing up Mezdulene’s interview and I will have it up within a few days. Mezdulene sent in wonderful photos and I think you will all enjoy listening to her! I sure enjoyed talking with her. I also interviewed another wonderful dancer, Chris Hilbert, aka Khalida Serqet. BDV members be ready for some fun times and good laughs!

Go to Mezdulenes website www.jareeda.com for information on subscribing to Jareeda, Dance Camp and Belly Dancer USA

Sad News 

We are in the process of losing our cat, BooBoo who is 17 years old. She went down hill fast two weeks ago, so we are making life as comfortable as possible for her. Those of you who know Booboo, wish her well on her journey. Sad times right now…

I am working as fast as I can so when you go to Belly Dance Village be ready for some awesome interviews with amazing women who are making a difference not only in their communities but in our belly dance world!

In Loving Memory of BooBoo 1995-2012

BooBoo died last night after we published my blog post. It was devastatingly hard to lose her. Today and the weeks to follow will be a constant heart ache.

The post The Woman Tick appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Sometimes in our daily lives, we don’t always want to be politically correct or play nice. We can become alittle exorcisty and being politically correct is the farthest thing from our minds,  at least for that particular moment. We can excuse ourselves by saying, I’m in a full blown PMS state of mind or it’s the weather and a good one that I like to use is, I woke up feeling an impending event is going to happen. I prefer this last one, because people can’t really say your bonkers, well…at least not to your face. The question here, is what do entertainers do when they get the blues? Have you ever walked into a dressing room full of women and felt that familiar vibe of anxiety and grumpiness mixed together, (aka) gloomy apprehension. Add in attitudes and preconceived ideas of strained relationships and voilah, you have the evil twin ready to make her academy award winning performance.

Being politically correct can be hard sometimes. I’ve had friends who walked into work and with no words spoken, just a look, so I could tell it was going to be one of those nights. The on switch looked bent, to an almost unrecognizable shape because when a dancer feels “off”, the on switch can get beat up. It’s even harder to have a conversation with  someone, who has no desire to be civil.  I know this one well because years ago, I had a dance friend who for various reasons, one night was a real stinker. If I said it was a great night, she would say it was a horrible night. If I said the crowd was friendly, she would say they were unfriendly…you get the picture, she pretty much opposed anything I said. If I talked to her, she would interrupt me and start off on another topic. I gave her that friend look that said, knock it off, but she just shrugged her shoulders and walked over to another table. The following day, she called me to apologize and I accepted the apology but I told her, I was not a door mat. She was upset because her former boyfriend was at the club with another woman. I understood her irritation, but I would have rather she just dumped a pitcher of beer on his head and be done with it. And yes, I did recommend she do this, for the following weekend but like  all crazy couples, they got back together, broke up, got back together…

Words have power and I have found when women have an issue tucked away, they tend to get loose lips or the wagging tongues. Add in alcohol and the wagging tongue has daggers at the end of it. Let’s be real, being politically correct  goes out the window at this point. Sometimes the words can be insults that are wrapped around cushy and questionable dialogue. For instance, the insult is said and then our minds stop in their tracks wondering, did she just say what I thought she said? Or you know you heard the words, but you realize you either have to address the insult or let it slide. Letting it slide, is always the hardest part for me, because if I get my knickers in a twist, I want to engage in expletives. Like with all people, if we let someone off the hook after an insult, we feel like they knocked us off our cloud, and all these amazing, smart rhetorical comments come to us, days, weeks and months later, compliments of our brain. Thinking about conversations can be comparative to a  broken record that plays itself over and over again just to indulge our ego. My broken record memories come compliments of wallowing a bit in past experiences that still sting a bit or maybe poke me every now and again. Students poke the worst sometimes, and I wonder why this is so but I’m sure there are stories told about teachers doing the same, as well. One memory is a short one. I was at a students house teaching dance classes years ago, enjoying the companionship of my students. I mentioned that a dancer was coming to study privately with me from out of state, and one of my students said, “ I wonder why she’s coming to study with you?” I looked at her for a minute and said, “Maybe because she thinks I’m worth it.” She looked at me and said, “I don’t get it” and she walked away. I let it slide but from that day forward, I knew it was going to be down hill from there. Months later, circumstances lead us to parting ways. Was I politically correct, I don’t know, but I do know I wanted to punch her, right then and there but her husband being a cop stopped me. Pretty much, words represent who we are and if we don’t change our dialogue, we can stand to lose friendships and good memories.

Every production that I was apart of, made me realize that there is always a good time for being politically correct and a time for the evil twin to appear. The problem is the timing for either. My evil twin would appear behind closed doors when nobody was around. How could I prove I even had one…okay, there might be a few people who witnessed this alter ego but her timing was always off. Creative efforts when connected to dancers, bring about scenarios worthy of Hollywood yet a nightmare to experience in the moment. There were twisted tails of drummers gone wild, composers gone mad, (literally) character actors who disappeared without a trace, solo dancers who flew the coop with ruffled feathers and the show stopper ending, that almost wasn’t. The list goes on as every producer knows but nobody told me how long the list was. Being politically correct can cause insanity leading a person to become their own rendition of , One flew over the Cuckoos nest.

I brought up this topic of being politically correct because I wonder if it exacerbates the issues we face in our communities. What about issues that are swept under the rug? Bad behavior, bad attitudes, underhanded activities and back stabbing aren’t just in the movies. I guess what I’m asking all of you is, what is your opinion about being politically correct? Is it the nirvana way to a better way of living in our society? Who then deals with the issues down the line or do they change by our actions? Lots of questions, but I’m sure you all have lots of answers!

One morning I woke up grumpy, growled out of bed and snarled at Daniel and Savanah. I was exorcisty beyond normal (hard to believe) this particular day so I got my coat on, and went outside to start the car. To my utter surprise,  I stepped on black ice, flew up in the air and landed with a quick and swift thud on my back. I waved at God and said, “Okay God, I’ll be nicer today, just no more surprises…okay?!” Needless to say God taught me a good lesson that day; he’s always watching, so play nice! I don’t know if this has anything to do with being politically correct but I do know that I was a lot nicer from that moment forward. I even laughed as I walked back inside from starting the car. It’s all in how you look at things.

Video News

I have the Friday class to finish and then the practicing at home videos will be complete and then…dant ta  da…I am doing a choreography video for troupes. So that means all you gals out there who have troupes, tell me what you want in a video and I’ll put it in. Maybe it will be two videos…who knows but I want you to know they are for YOU so feel free to pass on your desires, opinions and ideas. Email me at Leyla@leyla-najma.com

Also, exciting news for BDV members, I interviewed Mezdulene, publisher of Jareeda magazine yesterday and I will have the audio interview up in a short amount of time. For those of you who are not subscribers, all new, first time subscribers get a necklace and earrings (while supplies last) with their subscription. Go to www.jareeda.com

The post Politically Correct appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

What is in a title or one that is considered an insult? Many things come to mind when I think of the word, Crone and little did I know that it’s a derogatory name given to women over forty. Its companion is the hag and the insult is based on appearance, age, obviously gender and attitude. The preferred definition of the Crone is a wise woman, respective to the ideologies and idiosyncrasies of her feminine self. Who came up with the name, Crone anyways? It seems that the Crone is the third aspect of the Goddess, the curse of death or the fear of the mother’s curse. The Virgin who is pure and inexperienced, is the direct opposite of the Crone who for all intense and purposes, is the destroyer of life…hum…or in my way of thinking the head priestess that has seen it all, lived it all and has the mind set to teach her learned ways.

The three aspects of the Goddess are Virgin, Mother and Crone, but if we add in the Child then we have life’s seasonal changes or the four phases of the feminine image.  Cycles, vestiges or rotations are the unspoken language of a primordial history seen within trees, rocks and the land itself.  Our image as women survives on our remnants of rituals, ceremony and chronicles of how we lived through out history. This means our life cycles are a testament to the younger generations, what they have to look forward to in life, changes they want to make but a blue print of where they have come from. The Crone becomes not only a wise woman but the symbol and definition of accomplishments and the perseverance to keep alive the vivacity of cultures, ancient dance forms and the esthetics of defined movement. Since the Crone defines the grass roots of generations, it seems only fitting that she is placed in a revered position in society…but are we loosing her to subcultures that take and duplicate the styles of belly dance, eventually changing the movements to fit their position and viewpoint in society. In the long run, this is a tough question to answer because we have to first assume something has been lost or changed to a point of being unrecognizable.

Within Egyptian folklore, the Crone is in a way symbolized by Ma’at, the Goddess of Justice. Her main “job” is to keep balance in all matters of creation; birth, death and rebirth.  You can consider her like a triple Goddess with Bastet representing the Virgin, Isis representing the Mother and Sehkmet representing the Crone. All three are bound by the concepts of order, truth, and justice which can make the Goddess Ma’at seem more of an ideology than an actual Goddess. Since Ma’at looks into the heart of those passing into the afterlife, we can assume that she see’s the true essence of each individual. Belly dance in a similar way, looks into the influences of how each dancer weighs in their choices. I call this the trickle effect because in this instance, not only does the end justify the means but it defines it.

The feminine image can be likened to the four seasons, Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter which is the mirror opposite of the Crone, who beckons the closing stages of each cycle. Each aspect of human experiences can be weighed with life lessons which can make the heart light with joy or heavy with guilt. Belly dance symbolizes this concept, because within the elements of our choreographies and stories, how we feel in the moment of dance brings it all to life. Perhaps this is where the risk comes in, because in order to bring belly dance to life, performers have to work within the details of  their own fears, phobias and insecurities. This can be what is unrecognizable, the style of clothing, the movement to music, the music itself and the venue merging an individuals reality and fantasies together.  The combination of varied aspects of the mind, emotions and body can open the door, revealing hidden secrets. It is inevitable that the changes in belly dance have to do with the challenges each generation faces. Maybe what is unrecognizable are the issues, expressed in dance and not so much the rudiments of belly dance itself.

The Crone is a necessary aspect of our dance form because without her we wouldn’t have the desire for introspection which is vital to a dancer’s growth in choreography. The best choreographers are like the best script writers or authors because experience is the best sustenance that keeps creativity abundant and alive. The end of each cycle is the most exciting because how each dancer or character is developed within their experiences , leads audiences or viewers into the story being told or performed. We have to put a little bit of our own experiences into the mix in order to understand each character or performer. It’s this connection, the desire to compare our experiences with the story or performance that allows for the  Crone to come in and relate our similarities within the cycles of life. We are all intertwined to each other, the only difference depends on what season we are alive in and how much of the Crone we allow in our lives. I hate sad endings myself, but since I know we have similarities to the Moon, I wonder if the end is just the beginning of  another cycle within the eternal circle of life.

When I teach beginner students, I feel like the Crone especially with my age; the priestess who has lived almost the full circle. Have I kept my fires burning, is my temple the example of lessons learned, this I can’t answer yet. Menopause is my Crone experience at the moment but I notice that I am constantly comparing myself to the youthful Goddess, the concept of ageless knowledge that can no longer sustain my mind frame. The youthful Goddess as invigorating as she may be,  cannot give answers to questions that she, herself has not experienced. Just because I understand what the Crone is, doesn’t make it any easier admitting to myself I am her. The wise woman always seemed to be a white haired woman with wrinkled skin, commanding her audience and teaching with a vivacity of the ages. This mindset has elements of human folly because the Goddess concept is within our grasp now, it’s not in folklore or fairytales but alive within each woman who searches for her true calling in life. So the wise woman can be looking at us everytime we go to workshops, learn, laugh and find similarities with each other. The introspection of who we are as a community is our testament to every cycle of the Goddess and this means the Crone, wise woman or triple Goddess is apart of us, our dance and our stories as women. The river of life sustains us all and even though many of us walk along beside her, sometimes it’s important to take the plunge and swim within the essence of where we come from so we know who we are.

“God may be in the details, but the Goddess is in the questions. Once we begin to ask them, there’s no turning back.” Gloria Steinem

For now, I am sitting back getting to know a new season, the cycle of the Crone. I dance inside my heart with every phase of my Goddess experience. Perhaps this is the one aspect of the Crone, she merges into all of her experiences becoming a testament to her life. The dance of the Crone can be called, the divine feminine. The cycle of the Crone can be called, the exuberance of life.

Within this experience I am finding that the darkest moments have the undertone of the luminous self, the temple is within sight and my fires are burning. I have within me the vivacity of  all the seasons, leading me to believe I am really one aspect of the eternal circle of life. As Diane Mariechild states, “A woman is the full circle. Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform.” The Crone is not the end, just the connection from one experience to the next. I may not be comfortable with my Crone self yet, but I can take comfort in knowing I am the forbearer of  an extraordinary lineage called belly dance and the Goddess self called the feminine divine.

Trail Blazing Journey

Still taking the journey slow but enjoying my new found energy!

My Thursday Training from Home Video is up so those of you who are members, check it out at www.bellydancevillage.com

The post Dancing Like a Crone in the Age of the Goddess appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

Is it rational in these economic times, for dancers to think they can even make a living with belly dance? I’ve been wanting to write about the inevitable financial pitfalls we can all land ourselves in for awhile. There is no quick get rich scheme out there that will make you a top notch dancer that’s wealthy. The economy affects our gas, food, utilities and everything else, so why wouldn’t it effect our dance hobby or profession. Since I know that many women belly dance as a hobby, I want to relay my feelings on things that are done that can create an economic downfall that effects our dance communities. Some of these things might seem innocent enough but they ultimately effect the community as a whole. Dancing for free or below the going rate at restaurants or nightclubs, dancing at events for free, teaching class for below the average scale are just a few areas that have a domino effect. It’s important to remember that the lasting effect that free has on the minds of businesses, corporations or event coordinators stigmatizes our dance with the undesirable title of little to no worth. Benefit shows are not included in this because the intent is not to get something for nothing but to raise money for a worthy cause.

Years ago I received an email from a dancer who taught classes in a town Southeast of Albuquerque that stated she was offering classes for a whole dollar…yes that’s right, in case you thought you read it wrong, $1.00. I was flabbergasted and I wondered why she would do this to her community. She was a well known dancer and one that I like, so it made no sense whatsoever why she would do this. The impact on her dance community was as expected; no one would take from the other teachers because they charged $10.00 a class. This type of erroneous thinking is costly because if she wanted to raise her prices, who would pay her more? The economic pitfall bit her on her nose because she not only devalued her worth but she devalued the dance community as a whole. We are interconnected economically in more ways then anyone would think. At my studio I charged $15.00 drop in, $12.00 weekly and $10.00 if they took two or more classes a week. I occasionally received phone calls from women wanting to get in for less but I knew all the studios charged around the same price and this made it easier to set my price. We all knew we had to uphold the price so we could all make a living.

Making my own videos was a cheaper route to go that made them more economical for my students. My first video as I have stated in other blog posts, has finally made its money back but if I knew then what I know now, I would have done it all differently. Obviously, I would have made my money back a lot sooner and there would be more videos out. Sometimes cheaper is the way to go but invariably you have to do your homework to find out the best direction to go. Daniel did his homework and at first I dug in my heels thinking I needed to go the expensive route but as I thought about it, it became the obvious choice. I have more control over my videos and I know that the work I put into them will be a financial plus down the road sooner and with less stress. Plus I must emphasize here, Daniel is a tech wiz so that is imperative to a well thought out plan. You have to have the right back up and skills to make any decision work. I am lucky with Daniel and I’ll be the first to admit it.

Restaurant and nightclub performing is the biggest pain in the butt, especially when it comes to the drama and problems that dancers create. I was paid less then other dancers, other dancers were paid less then me and in the end it was all worked out. But the area that is the costliest, is dancers performing for free. Student night is not included in this, experience is golden but when a professional or professional hobbyist dances for free, this is the Achilles heel that brings the whole community to its knees. I wrote in my book about losing money big time to a dancer who performed for free at a nightclub I performed at in Houston. I couldn’t compete with free and what made it so disconcerting, was the fact she is a very well known dancer in Texas who should have known better. But when it comes to the ego or golden opportunities, some dancers just don’t care. The bottom line is, don’t dance for free if you are a professional unless it’s for a cause that is dear to your heart. I will dance for children’s hospitals for free and that is my vow to God for blessing me with my success in dance. Other then that, I am worth what I charge so I set my prices accordingly.

Now, I know there are small town gals who will say nobody will pay us. So here’s a rule of thumb that I think is very important. First, if they can’t afford to pay you, ask that they pay for gas or ask that you and your troupe at least are fed. Also make it clear that if you dance for them, they need advertize. Advertizing can be as cost effective as flyers and it doesn’t cost anything to contact local newspapers or TV. If you ask for nothing, they will give you nothing but expect you to perform for free. The value connected to free is usually not much. I know I’m repeating myself here from an earlier blog post but I think it’s necessary to state again because I get the same questions asked over and over again regarding problems with paying gigs, freebies and undercutting. I think dancers today, have to look at dancing for free versus their time, gas, costume expense and time away from family. It all adds into what’s worth your time versus what costs you for your time. If you come out on the short end of the stick, you have to look at new ways to make your dancing pay off especially in today’s economy.

I did a lecture/demo at the Hibben Center at UNM a couple of years ago. I was paid a limited amount of money but they did an amazing job of advertizing me in the newspaper, radio and mail outs. They were very appreciative and had me come back for another cultural event the following year. Another way to help gain the price leverage you desire is to dance for high profile people. I danced for world renowned Egyptologists when I was a member of ARCE, (American Research Center in Egypt) for free but I was able to listen to their lectures, meet them at private parties.  As we all know, dinner parties can be expensive especially if they are by invitation only. Everyone at the private dinners were lucky enough to hear, first hand information of new discoveries before the general public, so I was in heaven because my alter ego has always been an Egyptologist.

Bob Brier(Mr. Mummy), Aidan Dodson, Kara Cooney (Discovery Channel, Out of Egypt), Salima Ikram (History Channel, National Geographic, Discovery Channel), are a few who I danced for. Adding high profile personalities to my bio has been priceless and I have gotten work because of this. Professional dancers know that being connected to celebrities, if even with those in their hometown, gives them the advantage and edge they need for their performance price. I’ve danced for the Mayor of Albuquerque, FBI and Diplomats domestic and foreign so all of this helps. When I give out my bio, I want interested patrons to know who I’ve danced for, because I have found most customers won’t feel the need to bargain down my price, especially if they know I’ve danced for well known people.

Producing shows takes a dancers professionalism up a notch into the realm of recognition and prominence. In any art form, what a person does to gain more acceptance and notoriety helps the outlook of their art form. It’s not just Hafla’s anymore that will keep the studio doors open, but dance plays and shows outside the studio. The economics of today will challenge performers, and I have a feeling that many dancers will find it necessary to have a regular job outside of dancing. For those dancers like myself making a living with dance, marketing, technology and training courses are a given. This means that with I-phones, Androids and I-pads coming into their own, my on-line classes and their accessibility have to catch up to everything coming out. We have Amazon, Kindle and Barns and Nobles, Nook so if you are a writer this is another way to earn extra income. Advertizing in dance magazines might be done for a variety of reasons. The question is, how much income individuals really make from the advertisements. I guess that would have to be independently determined but Daniel and I advertize for a few reasons, one is changing and upgrading our sites, two is new videos, and three is new applications. The websites have to show that changes are happening, otherwise people feel a particular product or person is inactive or unproductive.

Understanding your target market is vital today. I want beginners all the way through professional level but I have to know what each level wants. Doing videos has helped me understand that each group wants and needs something different. This also means I have to teach each level differently and that is the key to making videos that relate to dancers needs. I am still a student and I know that my needs are different then ten years ago. So Curriculums have to cater to the knowledge and needs of each group, changing to fit each level. This is what makes on-line different then live classes, the technique has to answer all questions before they are even asked.

Economy will always play a part in the decisions and direction dancers take, but in today’s day and age I think it’s important to be realistic on what’s over the horizon. Down the line, students might have to choose between gas or class, so Daniel and I are making sure the on-line classes are secure and up to date.

In these economic times, think about ways to keep your cash flow coming in. Think about gyms, military bases, dance schools and retreats for furthering your income. Revamp your image in a way that attracts students, dance gigs and corporate events. Work in your philosophy of life and dance experiences because attitude and success really go hand in hand, you just have to figure out your own formula.

Trailblazing Journey     

I’ve lost an inch and a half in my midsection…yahoo!

I just finished the Thursday Train from Home video so it should be up on www.bellydancevillage.com by next week!!

The post The Economics of Belly Dance appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

What do people and families really think about belly dance? This is an open discussion that extends and co-exists with the life of the dancer. When I started out belly dancing, the hardest part was acknowledging to myself that it was a life time plunge of commitment and sacrifice.

Belly dance is a different kind of world that is like an endless ocean of undiscovered possibilities and hidden treasure troves of opportunities. To the individual dancer, every time we get on stage, we take a chance of either acceptance or rejection. If you think about it, it’s kind of crazy, this innate need to entertain audiences far and wide without knowing ahead of time, our outcome. We go on faith, and it’s this faith that leads us insistently on our belly dance path. In the end, what we have within us is the one truth that lights the way even in the darkest of times. I’m not being so melodramatic out of silliness, in one way or the other, we all walk the path of an explorer. It’s because of our commitment to develop our dance personas, wherein lies our human nature to languish at times or flourish. It just depends on the quality of our daily lives and commitment to their families.

In a way, every dancer has their families up on stage with them which is why the essence of a dancer is always so much bigger then just herself. Drama, passion, anger and joy all come through within the movements of each gesture and hip thrust. I have danced after an argument with Daniel and after it was all said and done, I drove home with the issue less problematic. Dance allows our emotions a healthy outburst without losing our cool. Our audiences don’t know any better unless they see us carry our issues with us when we walk in the front doors.

My parents have come to a meeting of the minds with my dancing and yet I can still tell it makes them uncomfortable. The rest of my family is beyond the intrigued stage, and find it normal and perhaps a bit boring. Savanah and Daniel support me when they can but I have come to a comfort level within my dancing where I don’t need them to see every performance. Because I made my intention clear regarding belly dance, everyone around me realized it was a fact life. But what about women who really want to dance and they get backlash from family members or friends? Years ago, a dance friend of mine met a guy who she really liked. He was handsome, wealthy and he swept her off her feet. He knew she was a belly dancer and at first he celebrated her dancing, but as their relationship ensued months down the line, his true feelings came out. He didn’t like the costumes, he didn’t like the music and he thought she was flirting with men on purpose. He said it was degrading and he felt she should stop dancing all together. At first, because she really cared for him, she decided to take a break from dancing but every week she would hear from her dance friends and they would talk about the shows and dance gigs they peformed at. She was miserable and deep down inside, she knew she allowed his insecure feelings to dictate her individual happiness. Interestingly enough, she found it funny how he didn’t want her to dance but yet, he felt it was okay to go to gentlemen’s clubs around town. When she questioned him on it, he said that it was different because they were strippers and he wasn’t associated to them in any way. Finally the light bulb went off when she realized he was the epitome of double standards, so she ended their relationship. The problem here isn’t strippers, it’s the mind set of people who live their lives according to double standards, insecurities and phobias. Plus, hello…we keep our clothes on!!

One experience that I had with a student has to this day made me aware of how interlaced our private lives are with the feminine self. A new student came to her first class because she had just lost a lot of weight and she was feeling confident about herself. She had always wanted to learn how to belly dance and decided it was a good time to start. As the classes progressed, I could tell she was happy and enjoying herself. But every time her husband came to pick her up, he would sulk and ask in a loud voice when class would be over. I finally lost it and told him that he would have to wait outside. He was angry and called to his wife to leave with him. Unfortunately, even under the protest of students asking her to stay, she left with him and the following day called me, telling me she would have to quit taking classes. She said her husband felt they were a waste of time and he didn’t like his time being taken up, having to drop her off and pick her up. I offered to help out by picking her up and dropping her off but she told me that the classes were causing problems in her marriage. She allowed her joy and bliss to be swept aside for a selfish man. How many women in our society do this and at what cost?

The mind can become scrambled and confused, especially when it comes to sexuality and sensuality. Society throws us into a melting pot that has nothing to do with us. We are apart of a different kind of buffet that has endless tastes, smells and delights, so the desire to separate our dance from others types, is based on it’s own unique aroma, called the spice of life.

I went through problems with my first marriage and I had friends who supported my ex’s feelings. I remember a friend who knew nothing about belly dance, came up to me and said, “Why would you want to move like that in front of a lot of people? I think it would be very embarrassing to do that.” What do you say to someone as ignorant as that? It was apparent, that this woman had self image issues, besides wanting to drag myself confidence down to her level. Now when I see some of these friends, they can’t wait to ask me about what I’m doing and they genuinely give me support that they didn’t in the beginning. I think the difference with belly dance from other dance forms is this “prove me wrong” type of attitude. It’s like we have to go through a rite of passage with family and friends that can be exhausting. The saving grace for most of us, is the empowerment of who we become as we progress through life as belly dancers. I know we really don’t have anything to prove, but in the end, just the fact we are doing what we love, speaks volumes that is not only heard but felt by many.

There’s the other side to this coin that is really on the perverted side. I had a private student, whose husband insisted that he watch us practice. He loved belly dance, or so I was told and his wife would be required to dance for him after I left, which I thought was kind of weird. Anyways, I noticed that he was asking me to stay for lunch more and more after class and then he would sit close to me at the kitchen table and before I knew it…his hand was on my thigh. If looks could kill…he would have been massacred. Needless to say after that incident, the private classes ended at their house and I made her come to my studio…alone.

And…believe it or not, nightclubs sometimes attract the darndest people, some who have bizarre fetishes. I had an experience with a couple that leaned towards the kinky side. A husband and wife would come and watch me perform at a restaurant/nightclub called Sinbad’s in Dallas. They would come on the weekends specifically to see me perform…ahhh…well, this is what they said. The woman asked for my business card and told me she was very interested in having me come to their house for private classes. They were a very attractive couple and I thought she would down the line be a beautiful dancer. I got a call the following week from the woman stating she wanted to take classes but she had a bizarre request. She wanted me to specifically wear, an evening gown, garter belt and high heels. Time stood still and for a few seconds, I couldn’t get a word out no matter how hard I tried. When my voice came back, I asked her why she would insist I wear evening clothes and heels for dance class. Her answer through me for a loop, to say the least. She said, “I want us both to be dressed up so we can dance together, in front of my husband and then maybe take our clothes off.” Panic, fear and every major emotion went through me and I tried to politely decline her offer. She was insistent then her husband came on the line and I finally just hung up and had to sit there for a minute in order to gain my senses. I’m normally not a nervous Nellie by nature, but I was panicking the following weekend because I was dreading the mere chance they might be at the club sitting at their favorite table. Lady luck was on my side, because I didn’t hear or see a peep out them that weekend. But my luck didn’t last, because a few weeks later they came to see my show and asked the owner if they could talk to me. I was in my dressing room when the owner came over and said a couple out front wanted to talk to me. My heart dropped and I told him I would be out in a minute. I knew it was them, and low and behold it was, so I went over to the table with one thing on my mind, to set things straight. They wanted to talk to me about the phone call and I put my hand up and said, “I’m a professional dancer and what you were asking me to do was insulting. We have nothing more to discuss.” So I walked away from the table and never saw them after that…thank God!

Some of the strange things people say, makes me wonder if we have thoughtless people out there, or if our dance puts people in a hypnotic trance that makes them say things they normally wouldn’t under normal circumstances. When I danced at a restaurant in town called Pars Cuisine, there were a few occasions’ people asked me questions that seemed out of place. One guy was sitting with his wife and parents and he blurted out, “I here that belly dancing is great for sex.” His wife stared at him, his parents went white and then red and I tried not to laugh. I told him belly dance was good for everything and I emphasized the everything part. Another patron accused me of flirting with her husband who I must say was about as attractive as a doorknob. Anyways, I told her that I was really dancing for her since it was a woman’s dance and her husband said, “See, I told you she liked women.” That was one of those moments where I just stood there and stared at the customer. Poor couple, they got my gospel according to Leyla on all aspects of belly dance, the history, customs and expected manners from customers etc. I think that was their first and last time at the restaurant. Another customer asked me where the nearest strip club was, and I told him I told him I wouldn’t know. He said, “I find that hard to believe since you’re a belly dancer. I thought all belly dancer were strippers too.” I went from peaceful to ballistic in sixty seconds and made it clear the two had nothing in common. His friend understood my cold stare and suggested they go and ask someone else. I told his friend, “Good idea.”

With belly dance, it’s easy to see why people with no desire to study or research our dance form can get the wrong impression. But in many ways, it’s a sad sign of the times because we represent one of the oldest dance forms on the planet. I stress to my students, that once they begin their journeys in belly dance, they will be required to educate masses until the day they retire or breath their last breathe. Though I must admit, that with belly dance I have had the most amazing experiences of my life and the most bizarre. But hey, that’s what blogs or books are for. Who else could tell such stories without making them up…only a belly dancer.

Trail Blazing Journey

Thus far I feel really good, lots more energy and I have a new vitality. I am taking Thyroid Caps by Solaray, and Tangy Tangerine for vitamin and minerals. Menopause is a thing of the past and I do believe I feel better and back to normal because of the Thyroid Caps. Daniel can fit into his pants again..so he is very excited and I think I’ve lost a few pounds. I am doing my first video this weekend so we’ll see how I look in front of the camera. I am losing slowly but I am steady and I think with no cheeze and bread that I can really feel the difference.

The article I wrote about Barbara Sayre Harmon is going ot be in the next issue of Chronicles Belly Dance Magazine so those of you who haven’t seen the interview of Barbara for BDV, go to www.bellydancevillage.com

The post What Do People and Families Really Think About Belly Dance? appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

Imagine this… you have a great idea, one that you have been thinking about for quite awhile. You’re excited about it and you feel it’s a good idea and one that will succeed. You mention it to one or two friends and before you know it, the Copycat took your idea, ran with it and now it’s a production, show or dance play in the making and you are given no credit. When this happened to me, first of all I was stunned, secondly I was angry and thirdly I wanted to kick myself in the booty because I had a big mouth. Maybe this can be called a guilt by association reaction because why would I even want to kick myself? The Copycat is conniving because they can make you think it was their idea in the first place leaving you feeling foolish and confused.

Sometimes I think it’s just par for the course with entertainment but there needs to be certain boundaries that shouldn’t be crossed especially if you are friends or dance acquaintances. But this is only the tip of the iceberg; let’s not forget choreography, combinations and verbiage. I don’t want this to be my rant on Copycats but I think it’s a discussion that needs to happen. I know dancers who have had combinations, parts of choreographies or themes from choreographies and productions copied. So I wonder what you all think and if it’s happened to you. What can be done about this and what do we do to stop it in the first place. Is this even logical or reasonable to assume there can be a solution for the Copycat problem?

Okay…here’s something funny…it’s actually in my book. There can even be Copycats in other areas of dance which include body image. Yes, I had breast augmentation years ago and I actually had a dancer acquaintance run to a surgeon’s office and get her breasts done right after I told her I was getting mine done. She became an expert within a few months and when she showed me her doctor’s work I realized how happy I was because I didn’t have bowling balls for breasts. There was a moment when I think the words bowling balls almost slipped off my tongue but it didn’t and I was grateful that I just smiled. I think the look on my face said it all and then I showed her mine, and I knew from the look on her face that she knew mine looked more natural. Sometimes even a Copycat can end up with something completely different and in my case with my breasts; they are original only to me and still happy to this day!

You have all heard me complain about being plagiarized in a dance magazine by a well known dancer. That was the first time I had ever seen Daniel upset to that degree and it was my first time finding out that even well known dancers don’t have any qualms about seeing what they can get away with. I think I was more shocked by this dancers audacity then anything else but today because I write so much and I’m out in the world more, I probably would do something about it. Back then, around 4 years ago, I was not as confident as I am now in my words and I feel words are as personal as the person speaking or thinking them even if they are typed in a blog or written in an article. Words can be taken and borrowed but the originator of the thought is the genuine creator. A Copycat doesn’t have the joy of being inspired directly by thoughts and ideas; they take what is already conveniently apparent and try to make it fit into an unoriginal concept. This can be said for studio curriculums that are personalized by the teacher instructing their class or choreographies that come from music then formulated into ideas and then put into movement and combinations. Each person has their own stamp on how they put together moves and those moves are original to their body. That’s why in workshops most dancers don’t look as fluid and at ease with the steps as the workshop instructor, the moves aren’t original to their inspired creativity. We can follow movement and try to feel the inspiration of various choreographies and for most of us there are moves that just feel awesome and others that don’t feel good in our bodies at all. But workshops allow for this. Taking a choreography and borrowing every step and taking credit for the originality of it, is (I’ll put it bluntly) stealing. Mentioning the name of the choreographer should be a given and if a dancer performs a choreography well then both the original choreographer and admiring dancer win. A dance performed beautifully is a symphony for the eyes. There is no better compliment to any choreographer then seeing her or his original thoughts and ideas come to life in a dancer who understands their inspired and original concepts. Troupes are the best example of this and when they perform well, there is nothing more breathtaking then seeing a group of women demonstrating their understanding of conceptual ideas and inspiration…together! A Copycat just doesn’t understand this.

There can be Copycats who dress like us and pretend they are us. I actually had this happen to me in my twenties when I was married to a cowboy/artist. I dressed in my gypsy skirts, bolero and cowboy hats and peasant blouses which for New Mexico is called the Santa Fe style. But I was born here so I was just dressing like my heritage.  One day a friend came into a gallery I had at the time and told me there was a woman in town saying she was me and telling people about my lifestyle which included living in a teepee and my ex. Since he knew me he told her that she was not me and that she should stop telling people this. In the art world I am known as Rainbow (it’s my medicine name) so it was weird having another person going around telling people they were me, Rainbow. A few weeks later this woman came into the gallery dressed just like me all the way to the bolero hat and I confronted her with lying to people. She laughed and said she was just joking around but I told it wasn’t funny and that she needed to stop immediately. I had many friends who where police officers so I wasn’t too worried but she was fixated on me and wouldn’t leave us alone. We left for the winter to go work cattle in Mexico so after that I never heard from her again. I almost felt like I was in the movies called, The Body Snatchers and Single White Female, and to say I wasn’t paranoid is an understatement. I was always looking over my shoulder worried she was right behind me. This kind of Copycat is demented to say the least.

There is an unusual kind of Copycat, one who watches from the sidelines everything you do, then in a moment of opportune time they try to take away your thunder. I remember I was written up in the Fort Worth Star Telegram and the whole experience was just amazing. The photographer and writer came to the restaurant I worked at called Byblos and I experienced alittle bit of what it was like to be treated like a celebrity. The article came out two months later and right after it did I received a phone call from a dance friend telling me that all her friends called her to congratulate her on being in the news paper. She said they mistook my photo for her which I thought was strange since she was 4 inches taller then me and a different body type. A few days later after the phone conversation, we had lunch and the whole time she talked about how people thought she was in the paper. She didn’t say congratulations to me or say she even liked the article. Personally I was a bit mortified with the article because I sounded like an airhead and I don’t think I came across as having a very high IQ. But all I wanted from her was a congratulations and it didn’t happen. Some of my other dance friends didn’t bring it up until I asked what they thought of it and I got a few, “Oh, it was nice” or “I didn’t know you were in the newspaper,” those unfortunate kind of things that say so much with so little verbiage. The only two people  who congratulated me that first week were the restaurant owner Marios and my daughter who was aged 4 at the time. I showed her the photo of me and she hit it with her wand and said, “Pretty Mommy.” After that I didn’t care if anybody else said anything, my daughter’s approval was more then enough.

Another example of this type of Copycat is someone who thinks they will let you do all the work and then come in and take credit for all of YOUR hard work and efforts. The Copycat hears what you did and then speaks to people with this inside knowledge leading them to believe that they were the ones who did all the work. This kind of Copycat is more prevalent in our business then you would think. One time I brought in two dance friends into an article that was going to be written in a local magazine just right after 9/11 and what ended up happening is one of my dance friends took over the conversation with the writer and ended up being the expert in the article. It was suppose to be varied view points, that’s why I brought them in. She made it clear to the writer she was the “more” famous dancer at the table and I remember just looking at her and wanting to wring her neck.  At first I tried to make it okay but as I thought about it more, I felt it just wasn’t right. If a person is invited to partake in something like that, they should respect the person who invited them in. This is just another way a Copycat tries to steal your thunder.

So these are just a few of my experiences with Copycats…write in and share your stories. I know there are many of you out there who have dealt with a Copycat. I would love to read your experiences!

Trail Blazing Journey

Okay…doing pretty good this week. Daniel and I are implementing a protein shake into our busy schedules for one meal. I do this in the morning and we also add in a mineral complex from Youngevity into the shake. Just before we go to bed we take a cleansing pill that does its job in the morning! So I am thinking that it will take about 2 weeks before I see if there is a difference. I’ll keep you all posted.

On another note, I’m getting ready to do my videos next week. I’m hoping for an okay from my doctor which I think I will get. So I will be doing Thursday and Friday Training from home. In order to get the Training From Home videos go to www.bellydancevillage.com

The post The Copycat appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

Okay…maybe I am getting myself in trouble here but I’ve had this on my list of things to talk about…I was wondering what your thoughts were about the changes in dance instruction. Including into this is of course on-line belly dance classes. What I thought I would do is give you my take on things and then hopefully those of you who comment in will give me yours. I think all viewpoints are necessary in making the carousel of life go round. I’m hoping for varied viewpoints and thoughts on the matter so I’m crossing my fingers you will write in. Even if you aren’t a fan of on-line classes all comments are welcome so don’t be shy.

First off I know that on-line classes are a mixed bag for studio trained and experienced dancers who are old school in their views regarding the problems that can arise from on-line classes especially for beginners.But Daniel and I decided to do the on-line classes because we both felt that there dance enthusiasts living in isolated areas, economically strapped, the single parent or both parents who worked who deserved the chance to learn. Daniel did a survey and we sent it out to dancers from all over with different levels of dance expertise. What we received back really surprised us both. The questions asked ranged from what would you like to see in class to what are your problem areas and the obvious questions of location, teacher availability and class time versus family time. There were multiple questions we asked but these are just a few to give you and idea of what we were looking for.

First off, some experienced dancers loved their teachers but they wanted more instruction than they were getting in class. On-line classes gave them this opportunity in the privacy of their own home and some felt this was better because they didn’t want to upset their teachers by telling them they wanted more instruction. Some women who wanted to continue their dance instruction couldn’t afford to go to classes anymore with the gas crunch that came our way 5 years ago. Others found that work hours didn’t allow them the time they needed for dance and surprisingly we had women write in who didn’t like their teachers or they had problems with other students in class and on-line classes gave them a way out. I love that I work with teachers because I’m able to share with them ideas for class time along with my philosophy on dance and students. Sharing curriculum ideas is the best part!

Location and teacher availability was way up on the list with women checking out my website and we received emails from dancers who traveled two hours one way or more for dance classes. This includes either no teachers in specific areas or sporadic workshops that dancers had to travel far to go to. The survey went out to dancers and students from all over the world so those who wrote in from Australia or from different locations in South Africa wanted options. I had women who lived in rural areas here in the States and Canada that had no teachers at all. There were women taking belly dance instruction from videos who told us they belly danced after the kids went to bed or others in the morning before work. I’ve had dancers say they love the option of practicing during lunch time. My main concern was for women who wouldn’t have the chance at all because of where they lived. Let’s remember, I lived on ranches hours away from any towns and in those days (I’m telling my age here) there was nothing on the internet in the way of classes, it just wasn’t thought of yet. I had videos that saved the day and the dancers who made them are appreciated to this day more then they will ever know.

Personally, I know that a live teacher in a classroom is the best case scenario for any student of dance. Believe it or not there are women out there who don’t want to be in a room with other women or men and they want to learn in the privacy of their own home. This is why I offer private classes now because I want to be able to work with beginners or the private dancer who won’t go to a studio. For myself, I love workshops, always have and always will because I’ve made wonderful friends and I’ve learned from the best teachers in the business. The expense for dancers now is a debate for students who put time and effort into something they are passionate about. With my accident and other ingredients put into the money pot, there won’t be any trips to workshops this year. A side note here, I will be preparing to do workshops next year so we are planning on the green light for that.

Workshops have always been important to me and I always suggest to dancers to go to as many workshops as possible. We all know that belly dance magazines are a wonderful place to find out who is teaching where and the dates that allow for a time frame because most of us have to save up in order to go. Yaa Halla, Y’all is a really good gathering for some of the finest dance teachers around. Every year Isis brings in a diverse array of dance styles, teaching techniques and dance stars for the professional or beginner aficionado of belly dance. There are a few Isis has brought in who do on-line belly dance classes as well. Isis is also the publisher of “The Belly Dance Chronicles” besides being a top notch and refined dancer and teacher. Isis has allowed me to write about on-line belly dance classes in past issues and Daniel and I were featured in an article for the April/May/June issue. On-line classes are getting popular and with today’s modern dancer, it’s obvious they are here to stay. I keep hearing through the grapevine that more belly dance teachers are looking at on-line belly dance classes even those who balked at the idea when we first came out with my classes.

Following dancers is exciting and with the on-line classes I have had the chance to meet women who I would never have met otherwise. Let’s face it; unless we are jet-setters, own our own planes and have stashes of cash within hands reach, traveling is usually on a budget. I would love to go to South Africa or Australia, Ireland and the list goes on…so the second best way is talking to women from these countries and finding out about dance in their communities. Belly dance is booming and I think one reason is the availability within the drop of a finger, YouTube and the fact that Shakira and other dancers have brought it into the main stream media. I’ve had the chance to create choreographies for a sister group called Sparx and soloist Kimberlee Ann Lopez. They are popular here in New Mexico and both Sparx and Kimberlee have a growing fan base that is changing with new fusion dance styles. Belly dance is changing the way the younger generation sees singing and dancing because they would most likely not see belly dance moves unless they were interested in learning our dance form. I ended up seeing many of my combinations in both shows and seeing the moves done well. Professional entertainers practice until perfect so they were a delight to teach. They wouldn’t have found me without my on-line classes so even top entertainers are looking for our dance on the internet.

Along with the on-line classes I have found that many dancers ask me specific questions on how to set up studios, workshops and productions. The more a student gets involved in her dancing the more doors open and ideas come to life. It’s not just enough to dance in shows, eventually dancers want to produce shows or bring in their favorite dancers. I love dance plays and anymore those are the only shows I like to produce. They are hard work and a labor of love because following a script and bringing in dancers to play characters isn’t as easy as it seems. But I have found that because I have to follow a script with my on-line classes that I am more comfortable setting up a schedule for projects. Since I have been teaching in front of a camera I’m more detailed when I’m explaining things in a private class or workshops. The on-line classes have changed how I teach because the student is in my mind and I have to answer all her questions within that class before it’s over. The on-line classes actually encompass so much besides just dance that I think they become a link for dancers who want to know what is happening with belly dance including news, workshops, new fusion dances and the latest gossip. Yes…let’s be honest, gossip is apart of all facets of life even belly dance or I should say especially in belly dance.

The drawbacks are obvious to on-line classes and I think if any teacher who teaches on-line doesn’t admit to these then they aren’t being honest with their students or themselves. I can’t see my students, that’s obviously the number one problem. How do I know they are doing the move right and how do they know they are doing the move right if they are a beginner? Watching student’s videos help immensely but not all my students want to send in a video of themselves. If they are living on a budget most likely they don’t have a video camera. Phones can take short videos now but I prefer performances or in home demonstrations of what they are doing in their dance. Number two is I miss the live classes I use to teach and the relating to real students. I tend to talk to myself way more now then I use to and I think it’s because I talk in a room by myself in front of a camera for an imaginary student that’s not there. If I wasn’t nuts before, this could actually do me in!! Number three is I love working on choreographies with students and helping them create their own signature moves. This doesn’t happen all the time like it use to unless I get hired for private classes. Workshops are fun and I look forward to them even more so now because of the interaction with dancers and students.

The big plus with the on-line classes for me is that Hip Phylosophy has grown because it’s a mix of my take on what belly dance is besides a changing community curriculum. It’s so rewarding when dancers take what they have learned and grow with it and make it theirs. I think on-line belly dance classes help exchange ideas and when we can talk to each other about problems with performing, opposition hips, curriculums and choreography it makes us all a community without borders. Since we have advertized and placed Hip Phylosophy in the main stream media, I feel an obligation to research the history of belly dance learning new tid bits of information every day. I’m in love with anything Egyptian and when I lived in Egypt I realized that the history is what makes it so mind shattering because you can actually touch and see it for yourself. So to me in a way this is what on-line belly dance classes have done for belly dance. Where in the past it was accessible only to those who were fortunate to live in big cities or in towns that had teachers and studios now women can learn anywhere they live. Today if a student finds she loves belly dance, the accessibility to learn and find other students of belly dance is easier. And we all know that if a woman is passionate about something enough…she will find ways to study it further. If on-line belly dance classes give enthused students a helping hand then the community is blessed with one more dancer that might one day be on the covers of belly dance magazines and teaching workshops herself. It’s the helping hand aspect of on-line belly dance classes that gives me a sense of pride. I was one of those dancers years ago that only had my enthusiasm, determination and passion to guide me. My how times have changed!

Week Two on my Trail Blazing Diet path

This week I am on new Thyroid pills from Solaray called Thyroid Caps to help balance and stabilize my body. So far so good and now I’m on my third day and I actually feel better than I have in a long time. You know how you can feel bad and that is the new norm but once you start to feel good again it’s amazing to think feeling bad was normal.. It’s kind of weird.

You would have been proud of me…I was at this great restaurant called Flying Star that specializes in baked goods. I didn’t have my carrot cake but days later I caved for a piece of keylime pie. I was dissapointed in myself but I have done good on the cheeze and bread. My daughter and I have been going on 1/12 hour walks and that is going well. Mother’s Day no bread and no baked goods. That was a good day and I hope all you Momma’s out there had an awesome time too!

www.bellydancevillage.com and www.leyla-najma.com are both my pride and joy (thanks to Daniel) so feel free to check them out!

The post What do you really think of on-line belly dance classes? appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

Are drama queens born not made? Was I a little drama queen when I was little…I don’t think so because my parents had the paddle of dread. Does this title only have to do with girls and not boys? I don’t think hormones or gender has anything to do with emotional outbursts but more to do with attitudes, circumstances and stress. In my twenties, people used to tell me I was the easiest going person they knew. Travel twenty something years into the future and now I am a bit of a neurotic, paranoid and worn out dancer that looks a little tattered. It’s not just life but the choices I made, the consequences of those choices and the people that were apart of those choices.  I think all the above helped to develop the drama queen but I was the artist, the sculptured figure and choreographer of my dance destiny.

In the beginning of my dance career, it seemed that the magical and wonderful world of dance offered me choices only dreams are made of. But as the years past, I realized that I was amongst many dancers who were choosing to become belly dancers too, in other words it’s only a matter of time before heads roll and tongues wag. I can remember the high school drama of, “Oh, she’s just jealous,” and the comments of, “They just don’t like me,” being common among the girls I went to school with. In theater we learn about drama in the acting sense but what about outside the theater? The more theatrical an actor is, the more drama he or she emotes so would this mean that since we are on stage, then we emote this drama off stage as well? It’s the embellishment of emotions and reactions to life that makes a drama queen even more over the top but in saying this…too many drama queens grouped together can suck the air out of any room.

I love attractive people and most of my friends are beautiful so perhaps there’s this part of me that believes success is part of a package deal. I really think a person has to work hard at being ugly. For example, my daughter’s biological father could be a Brad Pitt stand in but by the time I had Savanah, you couldn’t pay me to stay with him. He had exhausted even the most obvious and simplest elements of attraction. So is a beautiful person more prone to become a drama queen? In many ways I think it’s a mindset of persistent opinions, a slight passive aggressive trait and self importance. Well…okay beautiful people tend to get away with more crap then the average person. In my book I write about a beautiful dance friend of mine that I used to do shows with at restaurants and nightclubs and I found that sometimes I was invisible. Holding my ground sometimes felt like I was in a world of unfair standards and I finally understood I either had to focus on my dancing or crawl back under my rock.

One time we walked into a huge room of excited patrons waiting for a Persian singer to perform. The atmosphere was electric and we found that our music was already with the DJ and we were up next. The concert hostess unfortunately didn’t know how to manage things well and everything was chaotic and off schedule. If we wouldn’t have walked into the concert hall at the time we did, we wouldn’t have known we were up to dance. This group knew my friend well and everyone was yelling her name. A few people asked me who I was as we passed by but I didn’t have time to talk because our music was starting which was odd especially since we weren’t introduced properly to the crowd. I ran up to the stage and started to perform, a little out of breath with a frenzy kind of energy that started to take over me. All I knew was that I was so happy to be on stage, it was heaven, it was divine inspiration and all eyes were upon us. We ended with a drum solo that was from one of Hossam Ramzy’s CDs. We rocked the concert hall; I mean how can you not with his music?!! Everyone was yelling and I ended with a Turkish drop. Did they applaud…I can only vaguely remember but when we ran back through the crowd people were yelling at me, touching me as I went by, smiling their approval. It was the first time I felt like my dance spoke louder then any anxiety or insecurity I had. After that experience I realized that my insecurity of feeling inadequate could have brought out the drama queen in me. I don’t act out, I become quiet and self absorbed with a despondent manner to my mood. So my next question…is ego another facet of a drama queen or is it created through insecure thoughts that are backed by shallow achievements? Let’s face it, success comes and goes like the wind, what steadies us is the building blocks of our foundation.

I wonder how different a drama queen is from an egotistical person or are they cousins. Maybe they are opposite sides of the same coin and then there is a possibility of them being the same coin. There is such a thing as drama therapy. It’s a therapeutic remedy that includes, role playing, theater games, group dynamic games, mime and puppetry. The whole point of this kind of therapy is to help a person solve problems, discover hidden truths about themselves, catharsis (emotional release) and unhealthy patterns. By the way, Aristotle was the originator of this term called catharsis. There’s a good book out on the subject of drama therapy called “Drama as Therapy: Theory, practice and research,”by Phil Jones. It would be interesting as dancers if we looked at our habitual hehavior and characteristic in a way that allows for self evaluation. After the last show I produced I spent a year doing just this. It’s so important to stay healthy in this business so we don’t go off the deep end head first.

Let’s take the drama queen a little further…so what if we come across a well trained and proficient drama queen who has the passive-aggressive behavior down. I talked to my psychologist friend and she told me it’s a misused word that has become very popular in the last couple of years. I even remember hearing it on the “The Real Housewives of New York City” series where they used it multiple times through out that particular season. Some descriptions state that the passive-aggressive personality is a result from being discouraged to not show emotions growing up or it simply wasn’t allowed.  Another definition states that a passive-aggressive person acts out by procrastinating or by showing resentment after the fact. They don’t take responsibility for their actions and they turn the tables on others. Can any of you remember shows, or any projects that you took on with this type of personality? There seems to be various degrees of this type of personality and it seems to fit as part of the description of a drama queen.

I was thinking back to some experiences I have had with different dancers through out the last five years and I realize that dance can’t be a band aid or quick fix for emotional problems. Oh, and I am including myself here so please no emails from dancers thinking I’m pointing a finger. If there’s anybody who’s in the forefront of this statement…I’m willing to put myself here first. If we keep our sanity only in the office or work place and allow ourselves to go bonkers in our dance careers then I think we defeat our purpose for dancing. Belly dance is a therapy for the body, mind, soul and emotions and if we leverage it as a measuring stick to see how far we can go without taking care of ourselves then we will find that down the line we will be worse for the wear. Years ago, I had a plant maintenance business that did well but I was constantly running ahead of a large invisible rolling rock just slightly behind me and a few times it came a little too close for comfort. I was constantly traveling in my car and since I wasn’t listening to the signs to slow down, the Universe decided to do me a big favor by getting my attention through an accident. It got my attention and shortly after that I realized I had no time for myself and that the only person that was really suffering was me. I was exhausted and tired all the time due to my business, studio and then I danced on the weekends and then the gigs… Needless to say I wasn’t centered and my emotional state suffered at a cost not only to myself but to my family. Students seemed to sense I was down for the count and some liked seeing me there while others were amazing and pulled me up from my bootstraps. Sometimes when  you are in a leadership role students don’t understand you are just as human as they are. I finally said to my daughter, I’m ready for a break. So I focused on my dancing in a way that made sense for me, and Hip Phylosophy became a prominent curriculum that sustains itself by continually giving me joy and inspiration. My dance became my muse and the drama queen in me became less and less recognizable. Letting the plant maintenance and studio go were blessings in disguise.

How can we get along and keep a peaceful relationship with each other? I think in the end we can have opinions without agendas, ideas without criticism and be the consummate supporter of individual creativity instead of opposing each others inspiration. The drama queen only thinks of herself, her problems and life’s ill-fated deck of cards dealt her way. Life is a game of chance but if we play with a positive attitude then maybe we can find that even if we don’t always win, we can at least be thankful we are in a position to play. Sometimes being at the table of life is enough.

Trail Blazing Diet News

Onto the diet news…no cheese, bread and at this point I’m doing okay. I’m staying away from fries and enjoying salads more. I have lettuce growing in the back yard and it’s wonderful. I still can’t dance yet, the chiropractor says no but I’m crossing my fingers for next week. Once I can dance again and keep up with my walks I think I’ll see changes. Also talked to my aunt who’s a nurse about the thyroid and she suggested I look into thyroid pills for help. Once I get them I’ll share what they are. Menopause or not, I’m on my way and ready to lose weight! Thanks for all your help and I am also looking into everything you all suggested. Thank you all for your support!!

Look for my book “The Divine Unrest”!!! Coming soon!!!

www.bellydancevillage.com

The post Are we Drama Queen’s by Nature? appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

 

Today is the first day in over a week that I can actually sit in front of the computer and type so I have decidedly called this blog, “the curve ball of life” for a reason. I was in a car accident over a week ago and funny thing is, I’m in worse shape then my car.  A guy tried to cross a busy road from a gas station and he had to pull out just as I was driving by. Needless to say it wouldn’t have mattered who the unfortunate soul was that was driving at that very moment of this young man’s risky and obviously poorly timed decision, the collision would have happened.

So for those of you wondering if I dropped off the planet, the answer is no, I just fell off my feet for awhile. It feels good to be back again even if I am hurting. It sucks having work to do and not getting it done. The curve ball called life has no clue when it comes to schedules.

Before last week I was all gung hoe about talking to you guys about something that at this point is an ongoing topic for me so I was trying to figure out how to title it. So I came up with, “weight a minute or weighing in on life.” The weight a minute cracked me up a little and I was going to use it but now the curve ball makes more sense.

My menopause is and has been a real hindrance for me because I use to be the one gal who could lose weight just thinking about it. Since those days are gone at least for now I thought what the heck, I’ll come clean and open up about my chaotic world of weight issues and the drama that I create in my head that makes me even more insane then I already am.

I have been looking up different books on the subject and found a really awesome book that made me laugh by Anne Strieber called, “What I learned from the Fat Years.” What I like about it is the fact that Anne Strieber understands and talks about watching people around her lose weight while the pounds chose to stay on her. But obviously she lost a lot of weight and she explains in her book how she did it. I know that I will have to change my diet to the point that there will be certain foods I just can’t eat anymore but right now I’m not ready to do that. In my head I’m thinking, there has got to be another way. Darn the curve ball called life because this one nails you when you least expect it coming or think it’s improbable that it will be a problem.

I’ve looked at different angles and checked out what is going on with my body. I looked up hormones and melatonin and thought perhaps I wasn’t getting the right kind of sleep I needed. I found out that abdominal weight gain is a part of menopause. The body seems to burn fewer calories and wants to store the fat instead of letting it go. Even though I still enjoy dancing up a storm, it seems that now my life will be about new ways to exercise to help me get back to my old self. My diet is going to be interesting because there is so much out there that I love to eat. In fact eating is such a wonderful social activity. I enjoy meetings over lunch, sister talks over meals, daughter talks over meals or any kind of whatever over meals. I enjoy cooking and I enjoy going to friend’s houses to eat. Maybe it’s the Italian in me but I loved Europe and their laid back way of getting together to enjoy each others company and to feast on amazing meals. Eating can be so romantic like movies. “Water for Chocolate,” or “Chocolate” and “Julie and Julia” are all up my alley. But in order to be a dancer in our world, eating can be our number one enemy.

I’ll admit it, my ego is taking a beating too. I have clothes in my closet that I keep because I know that I will get back to my normal weight…eventually. The curve ball here is always the idea that I will eventually wear my clothes from ten years ago. If I let them go then that means that I will stay in my predicament and that is not an option, period. So my favorite clothes hang on hangers looking back at me as I try to figure out what to do looking back at them with this feeling of defeatism. That word would never have come into my vocabulary otherwise but all I know is that I have been in a state of constant denial for a few years now. So this year is my new quest to find the best way to lose weight and keep it off. The adventure starts really after I publish this blog…so part of what I thought I would do is to make my journey public so that I can’t fib about my progress. Not that I would but sometimes the Pinocchio nose syndrome does get the better of me.

Number one change that I have found is important for a woman my age (I’m almost 49) is that bread is no longer my friend. So that will be my number one change and that will be a bugger because I bake bread weekly for the family. You know that amazing smell that comes from bread baking in the oven that floats over to where you are sitting, luring you to the butter as you wait for it to brown…yup me too but no more.  And my number one Achilles heel is carrot cake so I can’t guarantee that I can keep away from that but I’ll do my best. I may sound like all I do is eat but not really, I’m just coming clean with my feelings about food. Food is apart of my identity and some of my most precious memories have to do with food. When I traveled to Egypt, I ate so many wonderful types of food including my most favorite baked goody, baklava. Sakti Rinek and I would walk the streets of Cairo at night and go to our favorite bakery that served baklava in a variety of ways that would make your mouth water. I also think I equate eating with my favorite experiences, places and people. It’s only human to do so but I must say Cairo was the one country that I traveled to that surpassed all my expectations which include smells, sights, feelings and taste. It was a goulash or a smorgasbord of delights and ever since my travels, food has taken on a different importance in my every day life. I relive my travels and experiences every time I eat and I think this will be the one thing that I will have to mentally change about my new journey on weight loss. Let’s see how I figure this one out?!!

My Aunt and Uncle moved out here from back east and they are the consummate connoisseurs of baking and cooking. My Aunt Melinda can make chocolate candies just like in the movie “Chocolate” and my Uncle Mike can make a Bloody Mary like nobodies business. They make homemade pizza, eggs benedict, and homemade dips and sauces. So this is not going to be easy because every weekend most of the family ventures off to their house to do the one thing we all love…eat! This curve ball goes right in the direction of amazing food so I’ll be staring at my clothes a lot just so I can stay focused. I either fit into my clothes or I’m going to jump off a cliff, well not really but in my mind the cliff is there and I’m at the edge.

So my journey will start on Cinco de Mayo. I thought it would be fitting to start on a holiday that remembers family members who have passed on with the celebration of food and music. I’ll keep a log on my journey and no matter if I go off course or not, you’ll know because I’ll be writing about it. If anyone else out there wants to start their weight journey along with me, let’s all go for it and see where we are months down the road. Hopefully I will be wearing my clothes instead of staring at them.

Bon Appetit!

Check out my membership site www.bellydancevillage.com and get the best in on-line belly dance instruction!

The post The Curve Ball Called Life appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

The purpose for belly dancing is as varied as the women who are attracted to the bling and colorful fabrics and tapestries that are so detailed in imaginations and stories told. It’s the before and after collective experiences that determine how our journey will take off and what will make it endure. As a woman in the belly dance field for over 20 years, I wanted to share some insights and the after effects that changed me, partially being responsible for making me the woman that I am today.

Am I any more secure within myself today? That’s a good question because in some ways I’m a warrior woman with a sixth sense when it comes to trouble. On the other hand I’m about as green as you can get when it comes to trusting people because I always believe in the best of who people are. I’ve had situations were I was shook  to my core making me even more unsure of my next steps in dance and life. The collective experiences of my dance world and life are a mix of the good, the bad and the ugly. I actually think they are all necessary in order for me to grow and mature. I will admit that there have been lessons I’ve endured that weren’t my cup of tea and I wondered why the heck I had to go through them. I’ve even put out an invisible sign to the Universe stating no more unnecessary lessons. I know some of you may be thinking, how would I know what’s necessary and what isn’t. I call it a gut feeling, my own morse code to God. Sometimes in the middle of drama I don’t always hear what he has to say and even with my gut feeling gnawing away at me, I march forward with a trance like determination. Why this happens is another one of those mysteries of human nature or maybe it’s called being a glutton for punishment. Our collective experiences from what I’ve learned are filed away into different categories I call the “the eternal circle of life.”

These categories are:

Spiritual Awakening–The epiphanies of self discovery including dance, family and philosophy based on religion, research and cultural esthetics.

Physical Awakening–Becoming aware of who you are as a human being and becoming comfortable with your body.

Community Compatibility–This includes your dance community as well as your family and career.

Self Compatibility–Finding peace within yourself and becoming your best friend.

Career Choice–Learning how to develop a passion into a career and finding the difference between making a living and having a hobby.

Family Choice–Finding the balance between self discovery and passion and family dynamics.

Financial Options–Hobby or Career choice, the ultimate decision.

Location Options–Living in a large city for night club options and family or small city or town for personal recreation and family.

Dance isn’t a simple choice when you really look at what it entails and what it takes to be a professional or the necessary skills just to perform. Our collective experiences affect choreographies that entertain the masses besides allowing us to express our own individual interpretations of the world around us. In this regard, the spiritual aspect of how we were raised and what we accept as our beliefs seems to be placed in our dance concepts by habitual living and thinking.  I remember when I first performed in front of my parents, the feeling was almost like dancing naked but in my case it wasn’t just an assumed improper dance but the fact I was their daughter doing an exotic dance that seemed to be pushing the envelope of  what they thought inappropriate. They didn’t seem to get that dance explored and released inhibitions. I was on the winning end because as the years passed I freed myself from those self imposed rules that weren’t mine to begin with. But I must be honest here; there have been times where those preconceived ideals put me in a category that was not much better off then a prostitute. The subtleties of dance can be interpreted by view points that make self expression wrong and dirty. That is why I always say I am spiritual, not religious. It’s because of dance and life experiences that I have learned to be tolerant of other people’s intolerances. In this respect dance made me a better person, more open to religions, perceptions, ideologies and philosophies. But God always puts pot holes in the road of life that keep me humble because I do fall inspite of myself.

I realized that belly dance became my number one band-aide. In the beginning of my dancing I was a size 2 and stayed that way until I hit my early 40’s. Those days are long gone but I find today that my full figure is hour glass shaped…well if I hold in my stomach and lift my chest and stand at an angle. In some ways belly dance has made me more aware of how mortal I really am, almost like an average woman on the street who is like a long lost relative I never got to know. How many of us walk through life with a smile on our faces because we are the total embodiment of the Oriental dancer. We are no longer the definition of societies assumed version of what a woman is, belly dance makes us redefine not only in our roles as women but our own analysis of what we think we are. I have changed my opinion of myself hundreds of times and it’s not just because I have matured, it’s because of the different stages of my dance career that made this so. My mortality is emphasized more now because I spent so much time being the entertainer that I didn’t get comfortable with myself and now I am left with getting to know the mortal me. The costumes, bling, make-up and details of my alter ego left no time to be ordinary, humble or the typical woman of today. The band-aid was covering my insecurities about being forgotten or as non-descript as anybody walking down the street. It has become clear to me that entertainers have more desires and needs to be appreciated then the average person. It’s not always a bad thing but a necessary characteristic to get ahead in a world that judges us not only on how we look but how we play the part.

What is a dance community? Is it a bunch of women getting to know each other in a way that works? Dance communities include glaring, hissing, whispering and some cat claws ready for unforeseen altercations. I’m talking about studios, teachers, students joining together in order to enjoy passions alike and good times. It’s possible but it seems there are always those unspoken words that spill out in those opportune times that really are inconvenient especially for anyone who has to deal with the drama. It’s almost like the joy of creating choreographies makes an insecure measuring stick that appears out of private and unspoken insecurities. The self appointed critic is born and the measuring  stick is either her abilities as a dancer or the lack of. I had a gal who used to tell me my arms needed work. (I knew they needed work and I enjoyed the process of working on them as I do still to this day.) She was a dancer in my town who appointed herself the arm expert of our community. The funny thing was from the first time I saw her perform, I felt her dancing was boring but I didn’t say anything because it was just my observation. Her dancing was her business. But she made my dancing her business and I found that as time passed, she could never get herself out of the rut that kept her own dance stagnant. Observing dance is different then critiquing others creative expression. Yes, we don’t always like what we see but that’s not really the problem. The problem comes from someone who never sets higher goals for themselves because they are so busy watching others succeed or falter. The habit of measuring can become more important then dance itself.

At this juncture in my life I have found that all of my collective experiences have made me mellower, more pensive and less paranoid. Yes, I did say paranoid because I was always worried if I was perceived in a positive light by my peers and the general public. It’s not that I don’t give a hoot about what people think anymore  but I can handle the negative comments easier now. I didn’t want to have thick skin but it has come in handy and I’m appreciative that I can’t feel the occasional stings of the daggered tongue. Being called passive aggressive was funny but more importantly I learned that people throw curve balls when they don’t like the truth. Any truth but their own is an absurdity but yet this is something that I had to learn about myself. I am the same way, especially if I don’t want to hear what someone else thinks. Yup, thick skin only goes so far but what do we do about our ears? Women are more then likely to be harder on their own gender because they base their insecurities on their own mirrored fears. Our own gender mirrors back to us what we know about ourselves yet that which we don’t want to address or admit to.

Compatibility with myself means that I’ve stopped pointing fingers at my constituents and that I’ve learned that the mirror has to reflect back who I really am whether I like it or not. At least the peace of mind that I have found when I look in the mirror is the fact that I can always put make-up on, fix my hair and change what I don’t like. Little changes, big changes, it doesn’t matter as long as I focus on myself and not someone else.

When I was in the middle of dancing in night clubs, restaurants and weekly gigs, it didn’t occur to me that I made a choice for my family in regards to my career choice. I mean, hey, I was an Oriental dancer and I was already dancing by the time I thought to ask anybody but in some ways I wonder if  I was fare with my expectations with family and friends. The duel personality syndrome was one aspect that developed along with my dancing. The rise and fall of a dance gig and my exhausted short temper the next morning especially from a late night gig was to be expected. Being “on” 4 to 5 nights a week took its toll and my career choice was a huge part of my relationship dramas that seemed to escalate as my career succeeded. I can see now that I was being selfish but back then  from my viewpoint, as long as people enjoyed my dancing and I was busy working that’s all that mattered. I was in the entertainer twilight zone, performing fast and furiously and my family had to figure out what to do about it because I was too busy. Yeah well, it was the perfect storm because there is no relationship that can survive  this self absorbed attitude. When I saw what I was doing, it was devastating to see what I put my family through but with the restraint to keep my family life together I learned that my career choice was only a success if my family life was a success.

When I came to Albuquerque, New Mexico, I left a wonderful career back in Texas and had to start back to square one. My dance friends in New Mexico didn’t know what I had achieved in Texas and to a certain extent they didn’t care because they were so busy dancing themselves. So I had to start from scratch and in some ways it affected my dance career because it took time for me to build it back up again. Once I was able to do this, I was not surprised that I had to deal with dance acquaintances who didn’t like me coming back, making a place for myself. Everywhere I’ve gone I’ve had to work my way up which I find exhilarating and challenging. Small towns are not the places to make a living with Oriental dance but if you are in favor of keeping the family peace then opportunities have to be self created. The on-line classes have not only been a saving grace but a wonderful dance experience. The productions I’ve co-produced were challenging, a pain in the butt but great learning experiences. I didn’t make money from them which I will change in the next one I decide to produce myself. I am worth a paycheck! What you make in your salary is based on what you think you are worth. I no longer work for free, I make a better living now with my dancing and I focus on what I need to do. It’s a good life, one that I learn from everyday. The best thing is that I am my own boss and I like deciding what I will do each day. Some days I work on Sundays and I work until midnight many nights but then I can take a day off and have fun with my family.

Our collective experiences seem to bring us back to planet earth. There is nothing like doing what you love and being able to share it with family and friends. If there is anything I’ve learned it’s that being self absorbed cut me off from the most important people in my life. I can say it, I hung with people who liked me because I was a belly dancer and I made time for shallow companions who were in the moment opportunists. Looking in the mirror is being able to say to yourself, “I told you so.” What I see now is what’s important to me, family, friends and a peace of mind that comes from seeing the forest for the trees. The blinders are finally off and my reflection is the real me. Yeah, not perfect but at least happy, the Oriental dancer grown up.

Check out my membership site www.bellydancevillage.com for the best in on-line belly dance instruction.

Thanks to Vivien Skupskis for her wonderful photos!!

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Sometimes I think I’m falling off the wagon…okay the belly dance wagon.  This phrase actually came from prohibition times when as a rule women would go from town to town on a wagon and preach against drinking. If they could get a drunk to ride around with them and get him sober they felt it helped their cause. Even though our wagon is different, sometimes an unexpected bump in the road causes me to fall off the wagon wondering how the heck to get back on or sometimes wondering if I even want to get back on.

As of late I have been reading different opinions on our dance and I’ve been slowly taking these varied ideals in like a sponge. As the years have gone by different attitudes seem to permeate and effect the changes in our dance field. And I don’t know if I agree with everything I read. I like to see  people’s different perspectives on things but sometimes I think that opinions have specific agendas behind them. And of course I’m the pot calling the kettle black here because I have my own views on dance that not everyone agrees with.

I have occasionally been the hypocrite because I didn’t allow my students to drink on the job. Years ago, I actually had a glass of wine in between shows and finally acquired a problem with the so called “wine bottle” syndrome. I come from an Italian family so we enjoy our drinks but there is a point where a drink here and there adds up to a problem. The one time I did have a student drink happened to be when a local group had weekly shows at a tavern an hour away east from town. She decided to start an argument with various dancers and brought up my name and studio.  This happened unbeknownst to me because the following week when I brought some of my students to perform at the same tavern for open dancing, I was confronted at the door by the angry dancers caught in the argument of the prier week. I calmed them down and told them she didn’t represent my studio or business that I did. They didn’t get her name and when I confronted my students at my studio the following week about what happened no one was willing to confess so to this day I have no idea who it was. That was the first time I was knocked off the wagon by one of my own students because after that incident we were never invited back to the tavern.

The gig question I’ve mentioned before in another post but I’m not really sure what the problem is for some dancers regarding belly dance gigs. Belly dancers have been doing gigs way before I started to belly dance which was over 20 years ago, a drop in the bucket. Belly dance gigs were apart of the way I was brought up in belly dance. Now according to some dancers, the gigs should be a thing of the past. I agree some gigs were not exactly what I thought they would be but the only reason I stopped doing them was because of my age. I’ll be honest here, what comes with age is a life time of accumulated impatience especially when it comes to people’s ignorance of our dance. But in 18 years of dance gigs, not all were degrading and my most favorite parties were for friends, some Arabs and Persians and let’s not forget the corporate gigs. Maybe my falling off the wagon was my preference to be on stage. It’s my first love. After awhile I just got tired of some people comparing me to a stripper but in saying this I realize that if I was dancing in nightclubs instead of small town restaurants I wouldn’t have had this problem. Smaller towns or cities seem to generate a laid back attitude of cultural ignorance. It’s a coin toss up in the air and how you decide to read the outcome depends on your dance experience.

The click mentality has been around since the beginning of Eve but here’s my thought on this one, there is a part of me that is so tired of seeing dance acquaintances or community politics decide our value as a dancer, teacher or person. I’ve worked with people in shows who haven’t spoken to me since these shows. We all put in our part and I must say with all our creative efforts, I wonder why some people think its okay to disown a friendship already in progress? I’m not talking about close friends here, I’m talking about those who partake in shows if invited and then you never hear from them again unless you decide to produce another show. I know in life we find out who we don’t mesh with but effort has to have some worth at least in the large scope of things. Sometimes effort is misinterpreted and exchanged for shortcomings in people’s minds. They see the cup as half empty instead of half full and rising. If we all rose together, the wagon would be full of merrymaking dancers who you aren’t telling your life story to because you are too busy living your life story with them.

Sometimes I wonder if some of my students of days past think I don’t care about them. In keeping with my philosophy on dance, I have turned students out before they felt they were ready to leave my nest. I had this happen with my very first teacher, Dina who shooed me out the door after 6 months. She felt I needed the tutelage of Sakti Rinek and you know what…Dina was right! At the year point I tend to do this to my students because once they start on their own choreographies and gain confidence to perform I feel it’s important to continue study with new and different teachers. Everybody has something to share, teach and I know with the many teachers that I have had my lightbulb moments came when one teacher explained something in a way I could understand. Verbiage is unique amongst teachers so a demonstration with the right words can change a feeling of “I didn’t get that to an elated, I got it moment”. I studied from so many teachers and I feel they are the soil that started my growth in this dance. Remembering my teachers keeps the soil rich with memories of each of them and this keeps my foundation strong. If I am ever overshadowed it is only my willingness to see my limitations through others actions and words. Each teacher I had who nurtured me through out the years has helped me grow out of my own self criticism. If I have fallen off the wagon here it has been my own insecurities listening to what I think others are saying. It doesn’t matter if the words seem real, what matters is how I react to them.

I took this year off of all engagements, workshops and shows to regroup and get my mojo back. I thought that if I didn’t dance every chance that came my way, I would be letting the belly dance experience slip through my fingers. I’m older now and I feel that if I don’t look at my path and see where I’ve come from then I won’t be able to see the meaning my path has for me. As we all continue on in our dance careers I do believe there are times when it’s important to study, learn, research and grow from the details that we have forgotten or are newly discovered. I’ve learned this year that there are so many powerful and remarkable men and women who through out their careers started out doing Oriental dance before venturing onto other dance forms. Imagine the turn of the century and the impression our dance had on the minds and imaginations of those patrons of the Chicago Worlds Fair. This year is going back in history and learning the who’s who of our dance field and my favorite study of all time, the Egyptians. For the first time I feel I am not only in the wagon, I’m leading the horses in the direction I want to go. Sometimes we have to fall off the wagon in order to get back on and find ourselves. This time it feels good knowing where I’m going but more importantly where I’ve come from.

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My title, let’s talk online belly dance  videos, came about because I get a monthly blog that is very good and full of important info. It by chance had an article on the do’s and don’ts of creating a professional instructional video. Some of the things stated in the article I didn’t agree with so I decided to let you all know my views on what it takes to do videos and the time involved to make them consistent.

I think the first thing that came to my mind was the dress code for doing an instructional video. Look, I do many videos and I don’t think people buy them because of how I am dressed. They buy my videos because of the content. I dress in color and in black with a hip scarf, nothing fussy that can get in the way of the combinations and moves. Sometimes I’ll wear a skirt; it just depends on my mood. But the bottom line is you don’t have to go and wear fancy costumes each and every time you do a video. Your statement will be with your content, not your clothes. Dress for the occasion but not for a dance gig.

The lighting is so important. We started out with natural light coming in from the windows and the one thing everyone forgets or doesn’t know, is that a one hour video will take up to two to three hours to do. That means the light from the window will change and you have to account for that. The change is subtle but noticeable once you start to edit the video. You will see it’s not consistent with the shadows on the wall and on you and your face. The best lights to get are professional lights so that you can have even light distributed on you at all time that is strong. Another misnomer is to videotape during the day. No, you don’t have to videotape during the day and just so you all know I do some of my videos at night due to my schedule. What matters is the consistency of the light. Direct light on your face, from above and coming in from the back and front corners will make the light in the video more even. You can keep the light consistent each video if you use artificial light that professionals use. We use daylight compact fluorescent lights that are the ones that snake around like a light bulb. Believe me they are bright and once you get down how you want the light to look on camera, then you don’t have to worry about the natural light coming in from the window changing on you. You save time each and every time you create a video.

This is a preference and if you don’t agree, that’s okay but I don’t like mirrors in the background because I think they confuse students. I have had students tell me that it’s easier to follow from the back and I agree because what do we all do at workshops; ask to follow from the back. The background can be a green screen or blue screen which means what…you can’t wear green or blue. You will be a floating head if you do which might be fun for Halloween but not for an instructional video. The background should be what makes you happy. I have my tapestry from Egypt behind me and it brings in such a magical ambiance to my classes. We used the color beige on the walls of the studio which was recommended to us by friends who are independent film makers. It warms the room and it made a huge difference on my skin color. It works really well with the direct light we use. I use a rug but would love a wood floor. The rug gives me occasional rug burns especially when I do turns. If you put an oriental rug on a slippery surface just remember it will go where you go and sometimes that’s not a good thing.

Also most videos are done for students and not clients. I send off my performance videos to clients who want to see my dance ability so there is a distinct difference between these two groups. Even if I get hired for a workshop based from someone buying an  instructional video, I am being hired for my content and teaching skills by dancers who are students first. I think that a target market needs to be in place and a plan devised before you ever get in front of a camera. Videos created that state they are done for all levels miss the mark because I have testimony from women from all over the world stating these kinds of videos are confusing. Remember a beginner will read all levels and think she can do the moves. She won’t be able to follow combinations made for an intermediate dancer. Think of your student base and who you want to target; is it beginners, intermediate level or professionals?  Make videos that are easy for students to choose from that make sense. An instructional video isn’t about the flash of a costume, it’s about the content and how easily accessible it is for students to comprehend and learn from. In the end most students are working on their own dance skills so they are buying your video to get ahead. Give them what they need to move along easily and effortlessly.

Regarding music, I use my CD I had created for my students to practice to. The music doesn’t have to be live especially if you have a good strong mic on your camera. We use a shot gun mic and it works perfectly. I also have speakers that I plug into my boom box and the speakers with the top gun mic work perfect. Editing in music after you have done the video is a major pain in the butt and it’s not necessary. I edit my videos so I know there is so much that goes into them plus then Daniel has to go in and do his magic with chapters and such. Make the process as easy as possible because if you do more then one video you will find they can get very expensive and that’s money you put into them before you even sell them. Marketing them afterwards is not just another blog post but should be a power point presentation. So if you want to create an online belly dance instructional video remember who you are making it for. It’s about your future target market aka, students and making the process something they will enjoy and implement into their dance. It’s all about sharing the joy of belly dance to women all over the world.

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Sometimes in our specific entertainment misunderstandings can happen not only out of ignorance but wrong impressions. I call this problem, shades of grey. For the general populace there seems to be this impression that belly dance is a fun and goofy kind of entertainment that anyone can take up and do.

Most professional dancers like myself have witnessed men say to their wives, “Hey honey, you should take up belly dancing so you can dance sexy too.”

This is common and based on a variety of cultures that are ignorant beyond their immediate surroundings and priorities. Basically if someone isn’t interested in learning something beyond the immediate they will keep their ignorant beliefs out of indolence. What this means for us is a lifetime of varied problems that can multiply into irritating phone calls, requests and situations that could be avoided if people did their homework. But for most of us we find ourselves educating the masses out of necessity because our dance some how through the years still retained it’s reputation as a “hoochy coochy” dance. First impressions can lead people into a multitude of directions based on their own frame of mind. This we obviously do not have control over.

Recently on our new bellydancevillage forum, Cleopatra’s Court, bellydancevillage member, Najla brought up a really good question, “What do I say to someone who wants me to teach for free?”

My dander goes up when this type of thing happens. How on earth could anyone call someone up and ask them to take time out of their busy schedules, pay for gas and text besides haul everything needed for class…for free? Maybe our reputation needs to be revamped but I doubt it has to do with the lack of professional dancers educating people; it seems more the lacksadaisy way in which our dance is approached by people. Do people educate themselves today like they did ten to twenty years ago? I think our dance evolution can answer this question by the problems that follow it’s growth and cultural esthetics. From my experience there seems to be a trend of indifference to learning about something that is unfamiliar or outside people’s comfort levels. It took my parents years to get comfortable with my dancing because in their minds it was an exotic dance form inappropriate to watch but then again this assumption was based on zero information just uninformed opinions. Without my guidance their opinions would have stayed the same way even to this day.

Do we unintentionally help stir the pot of indifference by dancing for birthday parties or bachelor and office parties? Do we unintentionally give out the wrong impression by the very fact that we dance for a living or dance for professional aspirations? I stopped doing birthday parties when I turned 43 because I ended up dancing for a young man who turned 18. His friends wanted me to do a lap dance for him. I asked them why they would ask a belly dancer to do that and their response both shocked and exasperated me; they said what’s the difference? I abruptly ended my show and thanked them for an enlightening evening because little did they know they taught me a good lesson. I let the restaurant owner know that very night I was no longer willing to perform for birthday parties, bachelor parties or office parties. It hit me then and there that if I was dancing for a culture that didn’t know the difference between me and a stripper then I didn’t need to dance for them. I was paid to perform at the restaurant as a dancer not a stripper so I ended the party gigs that night.

I decided after that to do more stage performing because for some reason the stage seems to dissolve the very problems that restaurant dancing creates or perpetuates. There seems to be a higher esteemed esthetics to stage performing and I found that nothing can beat the lights, curtain and ambiance of entertaining to an enthusiastic crowd who is educated in our art form. Bottom line, people who pay to come see belly dancers perform on stage understand and appreciate our efforts before we ever get on stage.

But why are there shades of grey in our dance field? Remember this dance attracts insincere people who become a vortex that pulls into it people who don’t understand the true heart and mind of who a dancer is. They attract people to them who help to perpetuate the confusion of dance esthetics by diluting an art form and turning it into a fast food market. All dancers who are true to their art form no matter what it is have an insatiable appetite where they constantly hunger for knowledge. We strive to achieve goals and aspirations through out our careers as dancers and performers living in the state of proficient grace bound by an old school dictum of practice, train, learn and grow. The shades of grey can sometimes become a refuge from a black and white audience and disingenuous peers.

There is no cut and dry answer that explains why after so many years we are still plagued with cultural taboos and misconstrued beliefs regarding an ancient art form that we bring to life every time we perform.  It’s within the nature of our humankind to follow fads that create myths and untruths. Add in self created ignorance and this can be the start of problems. But if these myths and untruths were mirrored back to us, could this change people’s perception including our own?

If Najla said to the woman who wanted her to teach for free, “Do you work for free at your office? Would you like it if your boss said, I want you to travel and do this work for me but I can’t pay you so you’ll have to pay for all your expenses out of your own pocket?” What would be her response…?

Okay, we all know what her response would be but the question is why would she assume Najla would do the very thing she wouldn’t be willing to do? I think as belly dancers we have to acknowledge our dance as a business and not just for fun and relaxation or recreation. Once we put this dance form into a place of business then people will understand that it costs money to learn, pay for costumes, travel and teach. I think we have to give our dance form the integrity that it deserves by word, action and education. Any reason for dancing is valid but men and women have to understand that within our dance form there are many professional dancers, those whom make their living with dance. To some, dance is a calling as intense and prevailing as the elements that cease to slumber constantly flooding the senses with desire. For those working their way up to master their own creativity, understanding this calling and reverence needs to be apart of approaching the fundamentals of our dance. It’s not about achieving a goal in less then a month, it’s about allowing creativity to nurture and blossom within it’s own time.

Shades of grey happens when common sense is thrown out the window but in saying this sometimes this is necessary in order to grow in a dance field that requires us to tear up the rough drafts of life within each performance. Every dancer has to come to a point in his or her dance and figure out their individual goals. But these goals have to respect the customs, dictums and dictates of an ancient art form that has roots as old as the bible. It seems that once we understand the history of what we are dancing, we become freer to interpret our own creativity within it’s learned knowledge. A true dancer knows they can spend most of their lives learning their dance form and yet know they will never learn it all. There is a comfort in knowing this because life really is a full time endeavor where sleep can get in the way.

So is it what we have allowed to languish in our dance that has effected our image? Is it short cuts to learning? Is it perhaps older dancers impeding progress with younger dancers by not passing the torch of accomplishment? Is it generations who have forgotten their history? Did we stop educating ourselves therefore dancing in an insensible ignorance or is it all the above? The answer lies within each of us and only we can answer this for ourselves. Some might answer that none of the above equates to them. Individual paths are walked in a multitude of distinctive ways that displays each dancer’s sense of worth, humanity, enlightenment and philosophy. Choices are made not only according to lessons learned but the integrity of the dancer’s view of his or her dance. This perhaps is what the audience sees thus making opinions based on visual interpretations of life showcased in dance. It can be a carnival of symbols and tutorial appearances. What they see is how they view life not necessarily how they see our dance. But the confusion of dance and life can merge together not only justifying their beliefs but tainting our dance with opinions that have nothing to do with us.

I have a simple philosophy: Fill what’s empty. Empty what’s full. Scratch where it itches. ~Alice Roosevelt Longworth

So I am sitting back looking at the shades of grey and in a way I realize that if our dance was black or white we wouldn’t be as interesting. It’s the avant garde attitudes of our dance that captures an audience’s attention along with our talent. Maybe what I’m saying is the shades of grey actually keep us on our toes guessing what our fate in dance will be. I would rather see shades of grey then limited black and white choices. As a Erma Bombeck quote says quite well, “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, “I used everything you gave me.”

Visit www.bellydancevillage.com and enjoy a potpourri of videos, articles, history and interviews!

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Following a life time of any ambitious endeavor, calls only to those special souls searching for a different kind of adventure that requires the fortitude of strength and unwavering convictions of an artiste. The journey is the place of origin that is redecorated with scenery of a multitude of sights, smells and experiences. Perhaps the only way to understand how to appreciate the journey is to remember each day is the revival of a different dance age.

The memories of life passing along lonely roads lingers within the shadows of a days journey that tells the curious or faint of heart stories that either shout out warnings or whisper breathless conquests. In today’s hustle and bustle of life, do dancers hear the ancient chronicles of forgotten dancers memoirs? I still listen to the vivacity and enduring stories of dancers who have gone before me paving the road for dancers to follow in their stead. Here are a few dancers of stature and eminence to keep within our hearts, alive as we choreograph our way through dance and life.

The Ruth St. Denis name is synonymous with modern dance. As a matter of fact she is called the “mother” of modern dance which predates Martha Graham. She made her career in America unlike her contemporaries Isadora Duncan and Loie Fuller. Modern dance can be called interpretive dance which allows for moving free form continuously within a variety of expressions and movements unlike choreographed performances. Ruth St. Denis utilized bare feet, a more liberated and expressive torso with uninhibited arms along with subtle movements and expressive gestures.  Her inspirations and studies came from Japan, India, Siamese, Thailand, Egyptian, Javanese and China. Like many of us, her personal life was tragic not in the sense that Ruth St. Denis didn’t live life to it’s fullest but the drama queen in her and her emotional and deviant symptoms lead to unfulfilled aspirations of her feminine ideals.

I love the fact that Isadora Duncan danced at the age of 6 and taught other kids in her neighborhood to dance. Isadora Duncan is also called the “mother” of modern dance decidedly being the creator of a new way of dancing perhaps called free form or movement that is absent of formalities. It’s interesting to say the least, who came first between these two matriarchs of dance but perhaps the difference is Isadora Duncan’s untimely death and her unconventional views for her time regarding relationships and marriage. She joined the Loie Fuller touring company traveling to Budapest, Vienna, Munich and Berlin. She eventually opened a school in Moscow only to find that the Russian Government didn’t fulfill a promise to provide compensation for room, board and a classroom. In order to support herself she went back to the stage and was unsuccessful in America eventually touring Europe once more as a dancer. It’s interesting to see that the path of each dancer is reminiscent of choices that lead to extreme disparities in a dance world that is small and yet so broad in interpretations and consequences.

Loie Fuller captivated Paris with her ability to use special affects including lighting designs, stage adaption’s and costumes. She used fabrics in a way that mesmerized her audiences along with lighting techniques that put her ahead of her time. She was a visionary artist that adapted her own unique style and was an improvisational dancer with the background of burlesque as a skirt dancer working in vaudeville and circus shows. Loie Fuller traveled to Paris after sensing that she wasn’t being taken seriously by American audiences. France became her place of residence with a fan base that appreciated her efforts. The Art Nouveau movement became enamored with Loie Fuller with such notable artists as Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec, Jules Cheret, Francois-Raoul Larche and Henri Pierre Roche to name a few. She had many patents related to stage lighting and chemical compounds created for using color gels and the use of chemical salts for luminescent lighting. Her use of the stage is obvious and reminiscent in today’s dance productions with the use of fabrics, lighting and stage symmetry. Loie Fuller’s ability to see the advantage of color with motion and lighting made dance a three dimensional spectacle that set her apart from her formidable counterparts.

I have to say that Martha Graham is my favorite not just because she did so much here in America but because she really took dance to a new level of interpretation. But I must admit there have been times that the awkward poses, gestures or positions left me in a confused state. That said I like the expression of non-repetitive dance movements because obviously I love spontaneous choreography. Her main teacher was Ted Shawn though she studied Oriental dance from Ruth St. Denis. Ted Shawn a dancer in his own right was married to Ruth St. Denis. Ted Shawn helped Martha Graham find emotional empowerment and interpretation so much so that she became a success and known as a Denishawn star. In 1923 Martha Graham left the tutorial guidance of Denishawn and became a featured dancer in the Greenwich Village Follies for two years.  Martha Graham’s 1927 performance was a social statement that left audiences unimpressed perhaps because of the conservative environment. After connecting with Louise Horst who was formerly the musical director for Denishawn, she danced with a troupe consisted only of women but eventually brought in a male dancer name Erick Hawkins a ballet dancer to join her company. The idea of bringing in human emotions and conflicts into choreographies resonates with present day choreographers such as myself because life is dance. It seems fitting to bring in social statements and philosophies into a dance that is free form and interpretive to each dancers emotional state. She also used biblical themes and obviously a variety of influences that creates interesting and captivating performances. She created a dance technique for modern dance that had foundation roots from ballet and Oriental yet opposite in her final definition of modern dance. She made her own way and you can’t help but admire her for her individual creativity that lives in each dancer who dares to follow in her incomparable footsteps.

Who doesn’t love the musical Oklahoma with the amazing dancing and singing. Agnes De Mille was the choreographer for this musical but it’s no surprise with her father being playwright William Churchill De Mille and her uncle who was film director Cecil B. De Mille. Add in such notable musicals Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, Paint Your Wagon, The Girl in Pink Tights, and it’s obvious to see that talent was passed down in abundance to Agnes De Mille. Her background in ballet afforded not only an understanding of movement but a timing that such notable choreographies must have either for the screen or on stage. She did however write a controversial biography of fellow dancer and choreographer, Martha Graham entitled, Martha in 1991. Friend or foe, it just depends on how you interpret the book.

These amazing women are a constant reminder of not only the revival of a different dance age but of the raw talent that matured into the most notable and talented dancers of our time. To create an individual interpretation of creativity and showcase it as the new form and style of dance means that there is a place for those of us who march to our own tune with no apology for our creative expression.

Dance Divine

“ We are free of time and space. The gestures of our right and left hands

in the meetings and partings of our rhythms are the fulfillment of our completed selves.

 In the endless avowal of that selfhood which is divine,

we use our translucent bodies in a new language to express the glory of our love.”

Ruth St. Denis 

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Is self indulgence a good thing for performers? Another word for self indulgence is decadence which I think is vanity’s appetizer, enticing us, making sure she lures us in. Where is the fine line from fantasy to self indulgence and when is there a warning that we are believing too much in our dreams? Making our dreams into a reality is life’s greatest lesson and teacher, making us the women that we are but I wonder if our choices aren’t skewed in the direction of an alter ego that slowly but surely takes over our every day life.

“I am a woman who enjoys herself very much; sometimes I lose, sometimes I win.” Mata Hari     

Legendary dancers through out history had to create opportunities in dance when there weren’t any. Zoheir Zaki is a good example since she had to overcome her father’s disapproval of her dancing. The night club circuit can be daunting and she had to start from square one just like everybody else. Was it Zoheir Zaki’s shear determination that created a successful career eventually leading to a legacy every dancer reads about and follows? How much do we have to believe in what we do versus over indulging in the complexity of our image? Sometimes proving ourselves to family, friends and dancers can become a life time endeavor that becomes a way of life.

Taheya Carioca married 14 times so Elizabeth Taylor had nothing on her. The unfortunate results of an entertainer’s lifestyle can be her overindulgence in keeping her lovers as muses instead of companions. Fifi Abdou had no less than 6 managers but she is considered to this day to be an excellent business woman who knows what she wants and is willing to fight for it. Her name is connected to scandals, controversial shows and provocative behavior that seems to push the envelope in a country that is contrary to both. Nagua Fouad at the tender age of 15 ran away from home to Cairo without a penny to her name. She by far has the best rags to riches story of any dancer because she rose to the top of her profession to became one of the most renowned belly dancers in Cairo.

“Great dancers are not great because of their technique; they are great because of their passion.” Martha Graham

When passion is mixed in with a woman’s objective to become successful, the world becomes her accomplice and witness. The end result can be a million to one shot with no guarantees. Nobody talks about the Drama Queen that is molded from the unforeseen choices that a dancer makes through out her career. Is the Drama Queen in a woman’s make-up to begin with or do we nurture this overbearing characteristic with false praise and words of encouragement that are superficial. Choices that women make in entertainment seem to create an overindulgent reaction to how the world should respond to them. We all want to be appreciated with every performance, a standing ovation but realistically the audience has their own agendas to contend with and sometimes they bring them along.

I was thinking about entertainers in general who die young like Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson. What was the neurosis of their fame? Was it the “on” button that became stuck or was it an insatiable appetite to be appreciated on and off the stage 24/7? Once the stage becomes apart of any person’s career choice, normalcy just goes out the window. To be the center of attention can create double standards that become a way of life. Being on top can take a toll on the psyche of anyone expected to be in perfect form every time they perform. With the desire to succeed there is a price to pay that at the end of the day might be costlier then anyone expected. My nightclub days were everything I expected and more but what ended up happening was I became a wine-a-holic by the end of my nightclub years. After 5 years, I thought I hid it well but most alcoholics think nobody knows or can see their secret. It was obvious to everyone in my family I had a problem but me.  Sometimes hiding a problem can become more important then acknowledging the problem exists.

At the end of every performance there is a state of mind that engulfs the performer. It’s a human barometer that starts a million thoughts to overtake the mind. Comparing and deciding how a performance rated along with everyone else’s puts the performer in a constant state of  uncertainty and self doubt. Words of praise can become secondary to the applause because to many dancers the applause becomes the only reassuring response they accept as valid. I wonder if performers at high levels of success become deaf to  verbal praises because words can become empty with no sustenance other then false pretenses. When the applause is no longer enough where does a performer go from there?

Entertaining can become a lonely endeavor which is why I think belly dance is so popular. Success or failure can be shared with women and men who understand the pitfalls of this business. But I think down the line we have to look at our unrealistic views of what success is. What is success to one dancer is failure to another. It’s the same old story, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.

“Most human beings today waste some 25 to 30 years of their lives before they break through the actual and conventional lies which surround them.”

Isadora Duncan

So the answer isn’t an easy one but it’s one that I think is important for us all to look at. Here’s a quote that states quite well what we do as performers.

“Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent to the dark place where it leads,” Erica Jong

We go as comrades into the creative unknown searching for our perfect dance that has meaning beyond the ordinary or mundane. We want to be the muses for the masses and this is where it can become hazardous. If we go down the rabbit hole we have to make sure we know our way back to where our unbiased, pure aspirations started from. Our roots matter more then we know especially when success knocks at our door. We are apart of a society that needs stimuli 24/7 and it’s easy to forget that it’s not only left up to us to entertain the masses.  Maybe that’s apart of our self indulgence as performers, we take on a hungry monster that is never satisfied.

“Going home means getting comfortable being who you are and who your soul really wants to be. There is no strain with that. The strain and tension come when we’re not being who our soul wants to be and we’re someplace where our soul doesn’t feel at home.”  Melody Beattie, “Finding Your Way Home”

Being home is remembering that it’s okay to be the average woman or man on the street. How can anyone entertain the masses if they don’t remember they are apart of society. Once a performer is comfortable and content with themselves, every performance becomes a reflection back to the audience that is a true gift; they become a living example of contented bliss.

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. Albert Einstein

Belly Dance Training at Home ”Wednesday” video is now out on my membership site www.bellydancevillage.com If you want to check out Monday and Tuesday videos,  try my membership out for FREE!

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As most dancers who do their own choreography know, we can’t just leave alone what we have already choreographed. For example I didn’t like what I came up with in my original text for Wednesday’s class so I redid the combinations. This means that if I have to redo the video, I will have to go over each drill and see what I came up with. I think I helped Murphy’s Law without intending to. So with this week coming to and end I have decided to end it with my favorite drink, a margarita and enjoy the Super bowl with family. Murphy’s Law is not invited.

On a really good note, the Body Image issue of Jareeda came out and a Belly Dance Village member, Najla (Allison Flynn) had her first article published in color titled “Looking Through the Glass.” It was great talking with Najla on the phone, she was ecstatic, dancing on cloud nine. The photo of her is just beautiful and her article is a really good read. My article, “Second Act” was published in color along with the photo of my dear friend and mentor Barbara Sayre Harmon and myself representing Fall and Spring. I highly recommend investing in a subscription to Jareeda so that you can support Mezdulene and her long running magazine. www.jareeda.com

The 8^th editing of my book, The Divine Unrest, My Stories, Advice and Personal Views on Belly Dance is almost finished…yes you read correctly because writing a book just really means you edit and edit and…

I have been putting out quotes from my book on Twitter so if any of you are following me on Twitter, now you know where my quotes are coming from. I thought it would be interesting to see how people reacted to my quotes and so far they have been favorited by friends and dancers. My book isn’t a long book, it’s a little over 200 pages so for dancers it will be a quick. I’ll let you all know once we get it ready to publish. Three years and counting…we’ll have to celebrate some how.

Last but not least, Sakti Rinek and Barbara Sayer Harmon’s; videos will be next on my list of editing after the Wednesday class. I will be doing articles on the life and careers of both Sakti and Barbara so down the line you might see them in The Belly Dance Chronicles.  www.isisandthestardancers.com

Remember that you get access to all my videos if you become a member at www.bellydancevillage.com so what are you waiting for? My membership fees are pocketbook friendly plus you get a family support that’s dedicated to making sure your belly dance journey is as unique and special as you are!

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A few weeks ago I ventured up to Taos, New Mexico and interviewed two very important and special women in my life. It was like going home and remembering where my passion started from even as naïve as it was. I went homeward bound to my belly dance roots because my dance journey really started in Taos. It was in Taos that I met Barbara Sayre Harmon and Sakti Rinek; the two women who would be instrumental in making my belly dance dreams come true.

On my trip up to Taos, I had forgotten how spectacular the drive was because everywhere I looked was breathtaking. Coming up from the canyon you are met with a panoramic view of the Gorge and the Taos mountains. They greet you like an old friend that has been around since the beginning of time. The view is always, fresh, new and awe-inspiring, no matter how many times I see it. In many ways, I said to myself, “I am home.”

The lingering memories of learning an ancient art form was almost like a pilgrimage going back to a place that transformed my life. From the day I saw dancers performing so many years ago, I knew belly dance had placed her mark upon me. Taos in many ways represents my temple of learning. Sakti and Barbara were the two women that took me by the hand and guided me into the poetic dance movements of ancient times. Sakti’s studio always had the feel of being an ancient sanctuary with a high priestess energy to it. As I entered her studio, I always knew I was there to study and to understand that the dance was a privilege to learn. Sakti’s curriculum was detailed and full of combinations that were easy to absorb and practice. To this day I find that Sakti is the one teacher through out my career that shared everything she knew about belly dance with me. Sakti always reminded me of a high priestess because she took belly dance and made it ageless. It was as if she took it from an ancient manuscript and brought it to life, always youthful with no apparent age to the movements. With ageless beauty emanating from her varied movements I knew when I saw Sakti dance that I wanted to be apart of this ancient heritage that was a rite of passage, the path of the enlightened and worldly belly dancer.

Every woman who goes into the farthest reaches of her heart knows that magic is alive and by proxy we are its ambassadors. Whenever I walk up to Barbara’s courtyard I am not only taken back in time but I think time stands still out of reverence. It’s a vortex of magical fairies, dragon flies, and an array of flowers of all colors and shapes leading up to her cottages that are alive with whimsy and delight. Walking into Barb’s studio is a piece of pure enchanting revival to the eyes. Everywhere there is a painting that leads you to another one and then another so that the senses are filled and slightly intoxicated with pure creativity. The colors seem to emanate off canvases that come to life telling their story from creative inception to completed masterpiece. For a dancer, the atmosphere can easily captivate the mind and stimulate the creative link between creativity and inspiration. With both studios apart of my up bringing and training in belly dance, it is no wonder that my dance persona is part enchantress and priestess. I think with most women, this is our rite of passage and one that we often forget.

Coming back to Taos was like coming home after a long pilgrimage where I ventured out looking for answers to many questions. I started off each adventure as a naïve novice and as time passed the proficient dancer emerged. As I was driving up to Taos, my accumulated experiences somehow looked me square in the face when I looked into the rear view mirror and I wondered if any of my experiences had amounted to much. I realized my fear was like a dress that shows off all my imperfections and magnifies them with no regard or consideration for my state of mind. I was wearing my fears of inadequacy with the details of a skilled seamstress.

The interviews in many ways were a long time coming. Barb has been living the painters life most of her life along with Cliff Harmon her husband and comrade in arms. Barbara is one of the top female portrait artists in the US besides being a well received writer of children’s books. Sakti has been living the belly dancers dream, traveling around the world for over 36 years. She has been performing and teaching her unique dance style to hundreds of women from all walks of life. They both radiate a kind of accomplishment that not many women can pride themselves in, a life time of creative study that results in endless works of art. The creative process became a way of life for both Barb and Sakti so much so that they have become one with the essence of their own inspired design. It is because of this very reason, I felt it was time to interview them for my membership site and get their stories out to aspiring dancers and artists.

Its funny how we think the world views us like we view ourselves, it’s really not a realistic way to think. As I met with Barbara and Sakti, my apprehension just melted away and I had the best time laughing and talking non-stop the whole time I visited and interviewed both of them. When I was looking behind the video camera and listening to Barb talk, I realized that there just aren’t women like Barb anymore. Her eloquence and refined gestures made me feel like I was in the presence of a legendary actress. In many ways each painting is a script or a story that has individual meaning to whoever looks at it. If I closed my eyes, I could hear the whisperings from each portrait that was surrounding me. That’s why I love going to Barbara’s studio, it’s a magical place that transports me into a world that is always waiting to be discovered or rediscovered. There were a few times I wanted to pinch myself just to make sure I was really there listening to Barb talk about her early years or the tidbits of information about Martha Graham. I decided right then and there I didn’t need Google or Wikipedia because Barbara was a walking encyclopedia. The amazing thing about artists is that they are sponges for every topic they come in contact with. There seems to be no stone unturned by the curious artist and I realized that creativity demands a studious mind. Barb symbolized this with brilliance and genius.

Sakti was as vivacious as ever just as I remembered her. I really think she found the fountain of youth and is keeping mum about it. The studio had a new floor that her boys (obvious young men) Eli and Adam put down for her. It was even more beautiful then I remember and with the new sitting area with large windows over looking her pond, it was just enchanting.  As we began our interview it was so much fun to relive Sakti’s stories and adventures with her. Sakti did what every belly dancer dreams of doing; she not only made a living with belly dancing but she became successful with it as well. But the difference here is that Sakti was “living” the belly dancers life instead of just talking about it. In the end trains, plains and automobiles become as familiar as each hotel room. It’s a gypsy life that isn’t for the faint of heart but for those who pursue it, the end result is enriched memories of cultures, people and places. Sakti’s portfolio isn’t just full of shows, workshops and performances she has the memories of each experience that lives inside her. The difference between a professional hobbyist and old school dancer is how they live their lives and what they carry within them. Experience is the upper hand in this case. You feel the experiences as soon as you walk into Sakti’s studio.

The working dancer lives a novel life that is a daily script made with continual rewrites but that is why it is so enticing for the average woman; it’s a nonsensical way of life. If women were any less complicated it wouldn’t seem logical but because we are who we are, it’s the perfect way to stimulate the senses and reawaken the soul. As Mae West said, “I’m no model lady. A model’s just an imitation of the real thing.” We either live our lives to the fullest or live to regret not birthing our dreams. And to me that’s the difference between women who go out and live their lives versus those who watch from the side lines, they make magic happen. So in my interviews prepare to meet two amazing women who made magic happen and to date are still living their lives to the fullest yet leaving room for new adventures, scripts not written and performances yet to be danced. It’s the blank canvas of life that allows us to paint masterpieces of our desires.

I will be eternally grateful to Barbara and Sakti who have imprinted upon my heart, joy; friendship, laughter, loyalty and the desire to succeed. They showed me this by example and it is only fitting after all this time I come homeward bound to my belly dance roots to thank the two women in my life who made all the difference and helped me become the woman that I am today.

If you are curious about my membership site, check it out and become a member. I have many videos to view and as you can see many more to come. www.bellydancevillage.com

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Interpretive Belly Dance – The Right to be “You”

Every year represents something that each of us holds dearly to our hearts. There are even those experiences that we let go of like dust in the wind. This year I decided to get back to my roots and talk about why I started belly dancing and what intrigued me about it in the first place. I know I stated in my bio that I saw belly dancing at age 6 and fell in love with it, that’s a given. But as I got older there was something else about it that caught my attention. I saw a chance to achieve my individual freedom to move and dance my way and be accepted for it. In my early years the women who stood out in my mind, understood their own unique style. They gave a different take on choreography and dance interpretation. These women have stayed with me all these years because they taught me it was okay to be me.

In the years that it has taken me to understand what my style is all about, I found that there was a price I paid for being “me.” As with any dance form it’s obvious there will be a multitude of opinions that are usually targeted at other people’s dance interpretation and preferences. Dancers tend to follow a doctrine that leaves little room for creative latitude especially if the style is not to their liking. In our world even though it gives the impression that creativity is welcome, there are obvious artistic guide lines everyone is expected to follow.

“As a solo performer sometimes we have to bloom and become one with our community besides being that individual flower” Leyla Najma

I’m not talking about the basic fundamentals of belly dance and good curriculum; I’m talking about a perceived ideology that women carry with them into this dance. Water seeks it’s own level so most dancer’s find their home or community that fits their lifestyle. When we mix ideologies and preferences together the guide lines become fuzzy. Everyone changes what they feel doesn’t fit their creative interpretation of what belly dance is for them. For instance, Tribal Belly Dance is beautiful but it’s not my thing. When I took Tribal in workshops I found it to be confining and confusing. I think the Tribal look with multiple layering and rich textures is eye candy for the soul but even with the vibrant colors it’s not how I choose to present my dance persona. It’s another world to me but one that is apart of belly dance. So I look at Tribal as my first cousin who displays the beauty of belly dance with refined eloquence. Tribal is the ancient sister to modern belly dance, obviously a family of unconventional traditions.

“Combining all of life experiences, lessons learned and not learned creates the most beautiful design of all; the individual dancer.” Leyla Najma

On my quest for finding the “me” in dance I realized that as I performed in shows, restaurants and nightclubs, I was molding and sculpting my dance persona as I went along. The end result was “me,” a dancer that had her own articulacy and style. This doesn’t mean that what I became was always accepted, what it does mean is that I had come full circle and brought to life my artistry in dance. When a dancer stops asking for permission to be creative then you know she has become her own masterpiece.

“Sometimes dancers are born molded and nurtured in the arts becoming the living essence of what they represent” Leyla Najma

The last couple of years have been very interesting for me because I have had problems with some dancers critiquing my on-line videos without even bothering to take a class. They have opinions based on those age old ideologies that they brought into this dance from the beginning. Empty words can echo into any community leaving impressions that aren’t based on personal experience rather personal insecurities. Allowing for creative expression seems to be a thing of the past. I think this is because there are so many dancers vying for the coveted limelight. Acknowledging another dancers success should be a right of passage especially since there are so many fantastic dancers performing now. Maybe it’s fear or self doubt that keeps dancers from giving each other a high five. What ever it is, it’s preventing success from becoming an everyday occurrence because ultimately success knocks at everybody’s door.

“If a woman asks you a question, it’s better to tell her the truth because chances are she’s asking you because she already knows the answer.” Unknown

Interpretive belly dance isn’t only about methodology and curriculums; it’s about incorporating life into your dance persona. The tricky part is making sure each movement and gesture is honestly who you really are. Dancing somebody else’s choreography is okay to learn from but eventually the movement has to make sense to your body by dancing it your way. Becoming “you” in belly dance means that music is interpreted without second guessing how you choreograph to what you hear. It’s beautiful to see dancers performing making movement second nature to the rhythm in the music.

“Walking the path as a dancer takes the same amount of steps as everyone else; it’s important not to compare your footprint with others.” Leyla Najma

Interpretive belly dance in today’s day and age is an expression of a modern day dancer who continually has questions but knows where to put the answers. Belly dance is as complicated or laid back as the individual dancer. How we stand up for our dance and self expression is as varied a statement to the dance world as the individual dancer. So this year I wish all of you a dance of great exploration and rewards. May the treasures you find lead you back to yourself, the greatest treasure of all!

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Dancing in the age of now is a question that has been on my mind for quite awhile. The best statement I can remember hearing is from the legendary Bert Balladine, “You have nothing to dance about until you are over the age of 30.” I didn’t understand this statement years ago but I sure do now. It hits home and has made itself comfy as the years have come and gone. Each year has given me a gift of introspection and wisdom that has occasionally felt like a reprimand but I’m old enough now to place it where it needs to go.  Life’s lessons aren’t about taking to heart the little inconsequential things; it’s about seeing the big and understanding where we are in the scope of things.

I think as dancers, we should step back from ourselves and see who we are in the moment. Is the image in front of us, what we imagined years ago? Every experience in dance is an unexpected roller coaster ride which makes it so exhilarating. Today I realize that I love to go forward and twirl around but going backwards makes my stomach queasy. Women can be the cat’s meow or the cat’s claw depending on individual perspectives that might be skewed to begin with. Learning how to release pent up issues and emotions has been a learning experience for me. I’ve dealt with a few curve balls in the last three years so I learned to play the game in a way that makes catching curve balls more fun then being hit by them.

Dancing in the age of now isn’t something that I have done very well. Dealing with myself on a daily basis is really like dealing with a full time drama queen. I understand me but after awhile I get tired of dealing with what I am versus what I was. So I wanted to talk about being in a place of comfort that has no regrets or misgivings regarding life…yeah right. If my age was a person she would be a confident and experienced woman. So I wonder why I want to be younger with less of both? Just because we age doesn’t mean we get any smarter. My youth has this lingering effect of giving the illusion that good times are only associated with her. What’s crazy is I believe her sometimes.

Dancing in the age of now isn’t always easy to explain. I often think about when dancers ask me how do I know how to place moves together to create a choreography. It’s always been a tough question for me to answer because through trial and error, I’ve learned to hear what the music is telling me. What I hear, I express through movements, gestures and traveling steps. How could I tell my daughter how to walk when she was one years old? She had to learn to pace herself and place her weight in a way that allowed for her to take those first steps. Once she learned to place each foot in front of the other, she was running! The lesson is about feeling what’s inside instead of waiting to be shown how to do something. Following what we know to do isn’t always easy in a world that tells us what we should be doing.

Let’s be honest here, being in a place of comfort for women really isn’t possible. I can hang in my pajamas and watch a movie and be comfortable but that’s not exactly what I’m talking about. Can I walk out of the house without make-up…no. Would I let my grey hair come out naturally…hell no! So comfort isn’t something that is naturally apart of a woman’s mind set. High heels, diets, wrinkle creams and everything else that goes into a woman’s daily regimen of creating herself has nothing to do about comfort. But in a very unconventional way it’s a comfort in itself. It’s really not fair because we get to wear vibrant, sexy and bold clothes along with make-up and bling. We can do so much with our hair and make a statement with it up or down. I think that’s why men don’t mind what we go through to be beautiful; they get to see the end results of our laborious efforts. So who is the smarter of the sexes…women of course!

Dancing in the age of now is kind of like a diary showing us our idiosyncrasies.  We never stop being who we are; we just become better impersonators of ourselves. I wonder if I really knew what I was like, would I want to be my friend? I think this would be a good question for women to ask themselves.

So my opine is pretty simple. It’s not just about accepting myself; it’s about understanding who I am. At this point I feel like I’m back home in my old room sifting through memories with them all leading up to the present me. As a Simone DeBeauvoir quote states quite well, “One is not born a woman, one becomes one.”

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I wanted to write a bit about the belly dance journey and to let you all know that every once in awhile the rose colored glasses come off and reality starts to set in even for us belly dancers. Sometimes women think that self fulfillment will happen magically with this dance and to be honest with you it takes work. But it’s the kind of work that feels more like an entrepreneurial quest. We make the journey what it is, a success or a spiraling drama. At times they kind of go hand in hand but how much really depends on you.

Just remember that you are the same person years later in the dance and the only changes are the levels of success you have with your dance and with yourself. It seems like it’s easy to forget our purpose in this particular dance field especially if you have professional aspirations and you have been at it awhile. Even women who take belly dance classes for self fulfillment reasons only can get caught up in expectations in what type of fulfillment will happen. We really are in charge of our own outcome but more times then not we forget we are our own leader and we start following someone else’s path. This is a major problem for many women because with any type of art we really have to create our own masterpiece. Even dancers who are apart of a troupe bring in their own artistry. With this type of  visual art in front of audiences it is easy to see why belly dance  has an occult like following.

As with any dancer, I started out with dreams and aspirations and they have never left me but the brutal reality of life as an entertainer and performer has tarnished my naive sensibilities.   But in saying this I also  have to admit  that I am a stronger and more focused person because  of what I have experienced. The constant drama of the stage will make any woman a seasoned performer but the important thing to remember is not to lose yourself in the lessons.

The key to the belly dance journey is to stay true to your path and follow your own gut instincts. Did you all know that gut means “God” in Scandinavian? So we just have to remember that God talks to us constantly through our gut feelings. And the gut feelings are apart of us being our own leader but of course with some help. Oh and by the way, this reminds me, sometimes you can feel alone in dance but creativity is really like a life time partner………she’ll never leave you alone and the best part of all is you will always have her by your side.

If we focus on our own gut feelings and creativity the lessons of the stage seem less dubias and  more satisfying. At the end of the day it really is about fulfilling the promises that we make to ourselves even if they were made long ago. The journey is about “you” and how you live life. The journey isn’t about  about who did what or what somebody said because ultimately it’s about what you think of yourself. Friends or no friends you will always be the one walking your path.

Last thought; it occured to me that part of the journey is being the kind of friend to ourselves that we search for in our community. It’s all in the company we keep  so with my gut, creativity and inner knowing of who I am I guess I really am not alone. It’s a good feeling!

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The Haunted Hips workshop was finally happening and I was ready and anxious not only to get started but to meet all the wonderful women who travelled to the workshop from out of town. The Magic Lamp Studio director Jami Chance is about the nicest and most gracious hostess I have had the pleasure to work with. Jami and I met through my online videos a few years ago and we have been dance friends ever since.

Saturday was a day full of opposition hip combinations that is based on the Hip Phylosophy curriculum. It was a day of laughing and dancing which is always the best way to learn dance. Everyone who came to the workshop came through the 4 hours of instruction with flying colors. There were different levels of dancers so it was an interesting mix of beginner dancers to professional. Sunday was a mini choreography on Continual Soft movement and group participation. It was my favorite class of the weekend because the girls took combinations apart and put them back together in various ways and then performed the combinations for each other. I think in the Sunday class the girls were able to see that putting combinations together can be fun and both groups came up with wonderful variations on the combinations. They could actually see that what they came up with not only worked but looked beautiful all at the same time!

The Saturday evening show was full of great energy and I must say that Jami did a wonderful job training her girls. Each performance was full of high energy and the evening flowed effortlessly and easily. It was just one of those shows that was a joy to be in. At the end of the evening Jami brought me roses and we all danced to live music by a wonderful drummer named John. It was the perfect ending to a perfect evening!!

When the end of the workshop came it was sad to leave. Jami’s family is just as gracious as she is and we feel so fortunate to have met Jami’s husband Steve, daughters Brittany and Bekah. Thank you so much for making our stay wonderful and memorable. And thank you Jami for letting me off the hook for forgetting the lights!!

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People were scattered sporadically around but when the belly dancers emerge to perform, the crowds cluster in closely almost magnetically.  I could hear Leyla Najma’s voice in my head, “When you’re out there performing you will be watched and critiqued by other dancers.” as I was taking mental notes.  There were a few lessons Leyla had been very adamant about that I became very aware of during the performance.

First, the duet is very difficult to choreograph for because it is hard to get 2 people who compliment each other and if they don’t it just looks wrong.  Second, if someone was trained in another style of dance previous to belly dancing it shows.  Third, layering is key and if you do too many of the same moves it becomes very boring.  And forth, chicken arms are the devil!

The performance I watched consisted of a young troupe of American Tribal Style dancers, and then a duet of the strongest dancer from the troupe and her teacher.  Over all, I enjoyed watching the troupe dance, the music was an interesting mix of traditional belly dance music with some electronic break beats and the girls added thier own little flavor to the dance which was refreshing.  While watching the duet I noticed that the teacher and her student looked extremely dissimilar although they were doing the same moves.  They both had technical skill and had a good rhythm that matched the music but they just seemed off because they didn’t look similar, they didn’t dance similar, and simply didn’t complimenteach other.

With the younger girl, it was obvious she must have had previous training in jazz or modern dance and you could tell when she executed her moves she had the grace of a ballerina but some of the moves seemed forced at times.  I watched them do 2 entire choreography’s and they seemed to last sooo long when they kept repeating the same hip combinations.  There was minimal use of layering and none of it was down on the floor, which I know is not acceptable in all belly dance, however it felt like I was watching a lot of the same thing for 5 minutes straight.  There were a couple accents of the hip that really went to the music and looked really great.

All in all the performance was okay, I liked that the girls were wearing fedora hats with their lacy 2 piece costumes, but the costumes themselves didn’t seem very high quality.  However, the thing that really stuck out in my mind was the chicken arms.  Leyla drilled me about my arms in the beginning and even had me hold pens in my fingers to keep them in position and to keep me aware of my arms.  I didn’t realize the significance of how much it can distract from a performance when your arms are not straight and graceful, but bent like chicken wings.  I found my self unable to focus on the movements at times because I was distracted by the dancers chicken arms, which is also part of the reason the duet looked so off.

So I must say “THANK YOU” to Leyla for not allowing me to have chicken arms! Aside from distracting from the choreography it just looks silly. So now as a dancer I am more aware that I will be watched and critiqued by other dancers and hopefully someone will tell me if I look silly so I can correct it and become a better dancer myself.  I am glad that so many women and young girls are learning the art of belly dance as a way for self-empowerment and self-expression and hope that they only become better, stronger dancers as a result of constructive criticism.

Joolz

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What I mean by this is students are learning  to understand their own choreography. The curriculum shows them how to connect the dots.

The one thing that I have noticed especially with the emails Daniel and I have received through out this last year is that many dancers don’t understand how to interpret movement to music or they don’t even know why they move a certain way to the music, they just follow their teacher. Some dancers have said that they learn the same moves over and over again but  the reason behind the move is not talked about.

I think as teachers we have to take a good look at our own curriculum and than stand back so we can take a good look at what we are teaching.

Connecting the dots never made more sense to me than it does now. We can’t just give students a glimpse of something and than hope they get it, we have to show them what happens when the dots are connected. What is so exciting right now is that the end result of my curriculum is showing itself in each and every dancer that I have.  I have beginner students who I started with this curriculum and they are advancing in leaps and bounds. I have students that have come back to me that are amazed at the changes and they can see the difference in what they had already learned to what they are learning now.

The online classes have really helped evolve this curriculum and my teaching ability. I have many students and dancers to thank for helping me understand that when a student is learning how to dance she has to be taught in a way so that she can enjoy and understand the process.

The formula is simple; opposition hips and understanding how they work together or apart. Layering with opposition hips and understanding when to work in your right and left sides. Transition steps and transition moves used to change with the phrasing in the music.

If students are given a repertoire of moves and combinations and they are taught how to use them than eventually the body will relax and take over. Once the body relaxes and takes over than accents,exaggerated moves or pauses along with level changes, lines and angles can be used in the dancers own unique way. The end result will be a dancer that is confident and well trained.

So for all you teachers out there think about how you train your students because once a student understands how to connect the dots,  the dancer in her will emerge before your very eyes and it is a beautiful sight indeed!

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That was a little creepy having a conversation with myself and than answering myself!  The other morning lying in bed I worked out a 6 week course curriculum and figured out how to make each class lead into the next.  Is creativity possessing me through choreography?  If so it is the kind of possession that never leaves you alone and can turn you into an eccentric old dancer who toots her own horn even if nobody is listening.

A wonderful quote says:

“Everything in the universe has rhythm. Everything dances.”-Maya Angelou
So maybe what is happening is that when we open the mind to inspiration it’s like opening the flood gates to creativity that rushes in with the power of the ages. I suppose that it would be easier if creativity came at the same time everyday but than wouldn’t that be a stagnant way of creating?  So creativity comes visiting  in my dreams, in the shower, in the car, when I’m dancing with students or without . And since creativity is directly from the Universe than this explains why there is a constant stream of ideas and moves coming my way.

How many of you feel this kind of divine unrest? It’s almost as if everything you look at has the beginnings of a movement. The tree branches blowing in the wind can be  either slow and sinuous  or fast and powerful movements. It’s all in the eyes of the dancer and how the tree is talking to her.  Students do this to me all the time. The best combinations I have ever come up with have been the inspiration of dance students who inspire me with their talent!

“One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star.” -Friedrich Nietzsche

So a choreography state of mind is what keeps the dancer alive and in her element.  I didn’t understand this years ago because I didn’t see movement anywhere I went. I think when a dancer finally embraces her own individuality she can finally see what was hidden from her. It’s almost like being in a magical land that at first appears barren and devoid of life than all of a sudden things appear before you that you never saw before. Maybe the possession creativity has on us just keeps us seeing the magic in life and than we see her rhythm and than we dance to her melody.

“We dance for laughter, we dance for tears, we dance for madness, we dance for fears, we dance for hopes, we dance for screams, we are the dancers, we create the dreams.” -Anonymous

So for now my students crack up laughing at my madness and I keep on tooting my own horn but the best part of all is my students hear me and they don’t mind listening!

Free Belly Dance Choreography Video

You can find a free 25 minute choreography belly dance video and wake up your inner choreographer

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One thing for sure Daniel is a trouper with a seasoned belly dance husband attitude. I often wonder what our husbands really think of our dancing which includes the drama that goes into each production, performance or dance class. They sit in the audience watching us perform knowing what we have put into our dance and than the first thing out of our mouth after the show is over is, “How did I do?” Now this really is not a fair question and it is pretty much a set up. They know this if they are seasoned and if they are not, they learn very quickly what not to say.

Of course we want honesty but than we also want praise mixed in for good measure.  I remember one performance I asked Daniel how did I do and he said, “How do you feel you did?”  We looked at each other, me of course frowning and Daniel with a blurry eyed look because it was midnight.  He told me I danced beautifully as always and had a distraught look on his face pleading with me for us to go because it was so late and his back was hurting. So off we went and I realized as we were walking to our hotel room that there were no complaints from him the whole night. Sometimes we can forget that even for our husbands the dancing can become a blur. And we can also forget how good we have it with them.

Recently  Daniel came back stage after watching  a show I produced with my dear friend Rozana al Jinan and he gave me a big hug and told me what a great job we had done. He almost seemed amazed that we pulled off the show because it was not an easy show to produce.  For the belly dance husband when his wife does a good job it some how  validates  his hard work making sure she stays sane. Sanity leaves at an alarming rate towards the end of most productions. Daniel seems to understand my insane chatter during shows and performances so because of this I am able to focus on whatever I’m doing. Not many husbands  can do this so it takes a special man to be a belly dance husband.

Drama in belly dance is a given and if we don’t  have our sanctuaries at home than the stress of our dance could really take a toll on us. So I am always grateful that Daniel understands this as well. Sometimes I’ve come home on cloud nine and other times I’ve crawled in with a battle weary look on my face. Either way Daniel greets me with a hug and understands. This is the whole point about being a belly dance husband, they understand what we go through.

Since Daniel has put so much of his time into my belly dancing we both agree that it’s about time everyone who comes to the website  read about his viewpoints of belly dancing. So I’m excited that Daniel has agreed to put more of his time into writing to all of you. And if any of you have husbands who need advice Daniel is here to help. As women it is so important to understand that our husbands go  through belly dance stress too. Since Daniel is a seasoned belly dance husband he’s here to help. So look for more articles, advice and tips from my husband and I will be here as well to help all of you with your dancing. So you all have a belly dance team to help you out and I am blessed that my husband is the other half of me.

The post The Other Half of Me (My Belly Dance Husband) appeared first on Leyla Najma's Belly Dance Blog.

What is a signature move you may ask? It is your personality and style that brings life into a group of combinations. It is you in a move and your dancing is done with your life experiences expressed through each gesture of the hand, arm, walk or turn. You are up on that stage 100%, therefore there is no carbon copy of another dancer only you. So as a dancer performs she has a select few moves that are combined and put together her way that reflect her view of the world. This view is only hers and as a consequence a signature move is born.

This year started out with a bang in signature moves. Currently I am working with a fantastic singer Kymberlyann Lopez who has just finished her new cd that will be released this year. We are working on belly dance moves that she will be incorporating into her dance along with her hiphop, breakdancing and jazz moves.

She is the new generation of singers coming out knowing that dance combined with singing can be a powerful tool to get your message across to your fan base and what better way than to teach them your own style of dance. I’m not talking about choreographed moves done to music, I’m talking about instinctive moves that accent words and get the message across in ways that the fans understand.

It is a silent code of movements that belong to the fans and bond them to the singer. Kymberlyann will be touring this year and her belly dance signature moves will make a difference and pave the way for future singers who dance to create their own distinctive moves.
Judy Maloof is another professional dancer who is taking private belly dance classes with me and we are incorporating sensual and classical moves into her ball room and salsa dancing. Judy is a risk taker and she understands that bringing in moves that speak volumes is the key to making a broader
statement to her admirers. She is one dancer that can hold her own with the best of them.

Think of ways to be yourself when you dance while you are learning to dance. I know this sounds a little crazy but if you don’t start putting in your personality and style in now than when it really counts you won’t be able to hold your own with the best of them. The best are so because they and their dance are one.

I know what some of you may be thinking; ok so how do I figure out what is my signature move?

When I work with dancers the first thing that I do is I watch how they talk and how they use their hands. Secondly I believe the body always tells its own story and if I watch enough movement from a dancer than I can catch a glimpse here and there of the bodies natural way of moving. Than I look at how a dancer holds her rhythm and how she counts to the music.

Even if a dancer doesn’t count evenly with numbers she will have a unique way of moving. So I look at this in the beginning and I can eventually see how a dancer prefers to move to music. To be a natural dancer means that you understand your preference in movements and how to time them to the music. Every dancer times her movements slightly different and this is a key element in understanding how to help a dancer create her signature moves.

Put together life and dance and eventually down the line you will understand your own unique signature moves. And for those who don’t understand or who are still searching, I’m here and ready to help.

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An African Priestess who mentored me years ago told me that we can always say no to the Universe and that our request will be honored. I know what some of you may be thinking; how can I say no especially if it is a lesson that is necessary for my growth? Sometimes in our gut we know when there is a lesson that comes around that just isn’t necessary. Realizing this can release the chains of “society expectations” that we carry around with us on our journey through life.

Our American heritage seemed to be added to the melting pot of the dance world. In many ways our lives are intermingled with each other to the benefit of us all and to our detriment.   This leads me to new insights gained from this year, insights that surprised even me. With each step I took with my yearly path of my dance education I realized that years from now maybe none of this will matter. Because I realized that in the end all that really matters is how I create my dance for myself. Does my dance end with me or will it live long past my dieing breath? Does my mark on the belly dance world even matter?

Is life like a catalogue where we can pick and choose what we want just as long as we intend the right things? This can become so vague because everyone has their own agendas. What is right for one person might not be right for another. How each dancer walks her path to me is a big deal. I usually will look at a dancers portrayal of how she views dance because it is a good indication on how she lives life. And one of my surprises for this year was that just because someone has been in this business for years doesn’t mean that they don’t carry insecurities with them all the way through their journey.

It is as if the insecurity in itself is a precious bundle that she carries along with her to insure that in the end it will all validate why she walked her journey the way she did. Is she “me” as well? Do I carry my insecurities with me only to make sure I intend things just  to validate why I carry them around? I found the answer to be yes and this was the biggest surprise of all!

Walking still further I realized that there will be those who come after me who will hear the whisperings of my name and wonder who I was. So early in the year starting in March I made a solemn vow to myself to bring solutions to various problems that dancers come across on their path. I heard the complaints even from my own mouth and realized that the answers have always been visible and accessible. I just was so busy complaining I couldn’t see the answers that were right in front of me. My surprise was how easy the answers are to see once one is willing to look. Adding to this I noticed there are those who will not look under any circumstances because to see would invalidate their complaints. It is amazing to see that those who complain help the rest of us find the solutions and in doing so we walk our paths with greater ease.

So this is one of the aspects of the melting pot we are all apart of and this is what makes walking the American Silk Road the greatest lesson of all. How we walk says a lot about how we live and how we live says a lot about who we are.

So if you are wondering what lesson it was that kept coming around the corner; well lets just say that I realized my place in my community has a lot to do with how I feel about myself. I paid my dues along time ago and those who were trying to remind me of my place did me a favor. I finally looked down the road I have traveled and realized I have come a long ways. And as the saying goes, “I may not be there yet, but I’m closer than I was yesterday.”

Happy New Year and may your journey on the Silk Road be everything you can imagine and more. As Henry Ford once said “You can’t build a reputation on what you’re going to do,” so make this year count and just do it!

Blessings,

Leyla Najma

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